I need some much needed advice for my situation. Would anyone mind listening and giving me some advice on my infidelity?? Please

Please need some advice single choice
	????
	????
Votes accepted starting: 03/22/07 07:55 PM
View Results

people will listen. it's what everyone is here for <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
just go ahead and post
(although the majority of people probably wont read it for another.... 12-16 hours, so dont get discouraged by lack of immediate response)

In the spirit of the poll I voted for ????

Now what is it you want "advice" about, waytoolong?

Over 2 years ago, I did my husband wrong after 20 plus years of marriage with a man who worked occasionally for us. It began by he and I talking while he worked for us then when he went away for 9 months we stayed in contact over the phone truly friends at first. I know still wrong. When my husband found out we was talking he said if I told him everything we would work it out no matter what. I admitted I had been intimate 2 times and that was it. Since then I have been physically verbally and mentally abused. This has went on for almost 2 years. At times I feel that is my punishment for being unfaithful so I have just allowed it. Now he is being unfaitful to me to get even still yet. There is so much more to it but is very complicated. What do I do? The physical abuse has pretty much stopped. What do I do????

Just wanted to say welcome to a great place. There are many people on here who can help you. First of all there is no place for abuse in a marriage. Can you please explain if he is physically abusing you? There is simply no reason to allow this kind of abuse.

We will need to know more details. Can you explain more about your affair and about what happened after your affair was discovered? Do you have any children?

My wife cheated on me and I divorced. I have never been violent but I have to say I have never felt such anger at what she had done. I never thought about abusing her though.

There simply is no worse thing a man can have done to him than to have his wife sleep with another man. Unless she killed me I can’t think of anything else that she could have done that could have tortured me more. You have to understand that his world as he knew it kind of ended.

Now he is having an affair. I am sure you now know how it feels now to have someone do this to you. I am also guessing that the world you now live in is like being in ******!

Can you give more details about your affair and his affair? Have you confronted him or exposed the affair? Is the OW (Other Woman) married? If you do not feel safe then it is understandable why you have not exposed or confronted.

No matter what you did again you do not deserve to be abused. Please give more details and also I have a couple of questions for you. Do you love your husband? Do you want to save your marriage? Do you have children? Please let us know and be safe.

I am not always on here but there are a lot of good people who are. Please feel free to post and again be safe!!

This is how it all started. We found out that my son had a drug abuse problem. He was about 13-14 at the time. He is now 18. This other man had just went through this with his daughter and really felt bad for me and was very willing to listen and try to help. My husband job causes him to be extremely busy all the time and he kinda was in denial about our son's problem. This other man worked for us occasionally but went back home after his job was done year after year. Home to him is over 1500 miles from me. When he left he said if I needed to talk concerning my son feel free to call anytime. We would call and talk only about children work, ect, I promise. For 2 years after that he would come and work for us for 2-3 months out of the year and nothing ever happened just talked as friends. One winter my husband and I started having problems due to he developed an extreme gambling problem. I begged for him to quit. He would for awhile but then he would start again. I was vulnerable and agreed to meet this other man twice only. I know 2 or 20 what does it matter. One day my husband saw me talking one the phone and I admitted to him that I had been talking to the other man. He told me that if I would come clean on everything we would work it out no matter what no matter what. Well when I told him, we was together twice, that is when the abuse started. That was 18 months ago. I didn;t tell anyone about the abuse except out of fear I stayed in contact with the other man. He begged to come and get me but I for some reason felt I deserved it and have 2 kids - older now 20 and 18. About three months ago my husband ran into a woman that many years ago, liked him but he says he had nothing to do with. He pretty much come out and told me that he was going to see her to get me back. What can I do? I tell him 2 wrongs dont make it right but he feels he deserves this. I do love my husband but I know he will never be the same. Now what please tell me

what EXACTLY are you talking about?