I didn't just "find out", but this is my first posting, so I thought I would start here. To tell it quickly. My ws started to treat me really poorly. Barely spoke to me, when he did it was nasty. If I was in a room and he walked in, he would walk out. Started keeping his phone on vibrate and taking it to work with him, which he never did. Quit sleeping in our bed. Claimed he "just fell asleep watching tv". Numerous times I asked him if he was mad, needed to talk, etc? Kids saw how he treated me and asked if he still loved me.

I finally looked up the phone bill on line to sort the numbers. Found a number called numerous times and in the middle of the night. Confronted him and he told me it wasn't what I thought and wouldn't tell me who it was. I told him either he told me or I would pay a pi to find out who it belonged to. He told me and I was floored. It was a woman he knew I would have a huge issue with, as she had hit on him several years before. She had just recently moved back into the area. I had spoken to her to help her out with an issue at school. Did he get her number from me leaving it around? He knew that this woman would hurt me and that is why he did it I think. When he knew I knew the number, he hung up on me. I found out later he called to warn her I knew. Much more to this story.

He tells me he didn't think we had "anything left". So after 22 years of marriage I don't even get a conversation? He just jumps right to the next one? He tells me they didn't have sex. Just talked. She is so easy to talk to. I ask what they talked about, oh, he can't remember. They talked several times a day. 6 times on our anniversary. One time we went to a wedding and he talked to her 4 times before we went and again after we got home. I asked if the idea of spending time with me was so terrible that he had to talk to her before we went and he said, no. I asked was it in fact so terrible that you couldn't wait to talk to her when we got home, he also denied that. I asked well, then what was so important that you had to talk to her, he didn't remember. I know this is a lie. We talked some and he said that he didn't realize I loved him.

I took care of my mother for two years prior to her death. He said that maybe he was jealous of all the care I was giving her, even though this occurred almost a year after my mother had died. I feel like such a fool. I thought the whole experience of caring for my mom brought us closer. A few days after I found out, I had asked him to talk to me about why, what was said, etc. Obviously she was filling some kind of need for him. He won't tell me. Then I really felt like nothing had changed as he doesn't want to talk about it. I asked him how "we were" and he said fine. I asked "fine? How can that be? A few days ago you were ready to leave?" He again said, he didn't know that I loved him. I don't see how that changes anything. He felt something or didn't feel something, in order to turn to her, and turned to this woman in particular for a reason. I have repeatedly told him I need some information to be able to move on. He won't tell me anything. Tells me everything is just great now. Like I should just pretend it didn't happen. Since, essentially nothing happened. I told him, I could have more easily accepted a sexual affair, but the fact that he says he talked to her about things he couldn't talk to me about, well, he gave her a part of himself he isn't willing to give to me and that is killing me.

My h is an officer and this woman has a history of going for the uniform. Has done it before. He fell for the the whole, your wife doesn't understand you story. He tells me nothing happened, they were just friends. He could tell her his troubles. He hasn't talked to her in 5 years and all of the sudden she is his best friend that he can go to with all his troubles. Of course, he says, she isn't like that. I felt him pulling away from me again a few weeks after this and asked him if he talked to her, he told me yes, I asked why and he said he had to. He had to tell her it was over. I said, what is to be over, when you told me it wasn't anything to begin with? He said he had to explain to her that he wouldn't be calling anymore. Nonsense. She called my house around this time and basically laughed at me. Told me that she told him that one time I was going to be in the room when she called and said that he laughed about it. Talked to one of my daughters on the phone and laughed at her as well. When we told him this, he said, oh, she wouldn't do that. So I lied as did my daughter.

Nine months have passed and nothing has changed. He says everything is just fine. But it isn't. Subtle changes. He doesn't touch me. Just normal things that he used to do. Brush the hair out of my eyes. Walk past me and brush a hand across my back. He hasn't told me I look nice since before this all happened. Surely at some point during the past year, I must have looked ok. I have degenerative joint disease. Not once has he asked me how I am feeling. I have lost over 20 pounds from vomitting over this and he hasn't mentioned a word about it. He tells me he loves me on the phone as part of his good bye. I say that doesn't count because it is just so routine, it is part of the bye. I have repeatedly asked him to talk to me to discuss things and on these nights, he just can't manage to stay awake. This infuriates me because he didn't have any trouble staying up all night to talk to her. I'm tired of trying. Tired of thinking something is wrong with me. Tired of feeling stupid that he feels things have been "bad for such a long time" and that I was totally ignorant to that fact. I have read the information here and have asked him again. I have decided that from now on it is going to be about what I want. If he doesn't care to give me that information, then he doesn't care about us and I am just wasting my time as I have wasted the past 22 years. Won't go to counseling. I wanted to go away together, he says it isn't necessary. This all started nine months ago. He tells me he hasn't talked to her again. I don't know if this is the truth or not. I know I can't keep going on feeling bad about myself, that isn't any good for me. If he cared about the relationship, about us, he would be willing to help me out here, but he isn't.

What can I do now? I really don't want my marriage to be over, but if he can't consider what I need to get passed this do I have any other choice?

I am not sure if I should be the one to reply to you but, I feel bad that you haven't gotten any other advice. I for one think that he is not coming clean about his A. It all sounds to familiar to me. I think you should read all the articles on this site pertaining to your situation. I am not completely familiar with plan A and plan B but, that seems to be a good start. Get aggressive with your questions to him. I believe he has more to tell

First off you are not a stupid wife your husband is the stupid one. Secondly, I think you should re-post this post in General II section where more people go there and you will get more advice. I can't give any sound advice because I'm the stupid one in my marriage now. Anyone who have an A is utterly ridiculous and needs a brain adjustment. So, far the advice I have received on this site has helped including the response you have given to me.

I am sure he has more to tell as well. I have asked him and asked him and he insists he doesn't remember. Worked for Ollie North, right? I think he just doesn't understand that I need answers in order to move on. Thanks for your reply. I am reading more and more everyday. Looking at both plans, but really hope it doesn't come to B.

Thanks, I appreciate your response. I did post in the other forum. I am a stupid wife. Because I didn't know that he felt something was wrong. Until it was too late. I knew that he was being a jerk to me. Didn't know why. He didn't give me the courtesy of telling me how he was feeling, the opportunity to address what was bothering him. Then when it got progressively worse, it was too late, the damage was done. It all was just a total turn around from his normal behavior. Hard not to notice when you feel like you were hit in the head with a brick. It is unfortunate for him that I know him so well and can tell when something is bothering him or when he is lying to me. It is unfortunate for me that I didn't figure out it was an A sooner. I think that is because it is just so out of character for him, nothing I would have imagined him doing. It is unfortunate for us that he didn't think enough of our relationship or me to talk to me before he decided to do this, that he didn't think enough of our 24 years together. I would have expected him to end our marriage before moving right along to someone else, especially THIS someone else. There is a long story there, but he picked her especially because it knew it would be more painful for me.

I know you have been told that you need to tell your husband. I would agree that your husband has the right to know, but I don't know that it is absolutely necessary. I could have easily lived the rest of my life not knowing this about my husband. The pain is just incredible. I can't tell you how much I hurt. That he was so unhappy and I didn't know about it, that he didn't feel comfortable telling me or that he didn't want to tell me, that I wasn't enough for him, That he didn't respect me enough to tell me what was going on in his head, that I, that WE didn't matter enough to him; that 24 years together meant so little to him. That I constantly think about what is wrong with me that he had to do this. Where am I lacking? That I am so lonely now without my best friend. The person that I could go to with any problem or concern and talk it through, even if it was about him. I have no one to talk to now because he is no longer my best friend, my confidant. That I wonder when we have sex, is it me he is having sex with or am I a substitute for the OW, that I am stupid enough to still have sex with him, that I am fearful if I don't, he will just use that as a reason to leave me. That I was not able to make him happy. That I have to watch how he acts in our home when it seems plainly obvious that he would rather be anywhere than here with me. I am just so filled with feelings of self-doubt, self-loathing, inadequacy, feel unlovable, feel like crap. Feel insulted that he thinks I was so stupid not to notice, that I am going to buy the "I don't remember" statement.

You said you don't want to hurt the OM. This just floors me. Why are you willing to hurt your husband? It is just a matter of time. He will find out. Then where will you be? This seems to tell me that this OM means more to you than your husband. Have you ever tried talking to your husband, telling him how you feel? Why do you think he doesn't deserve to know how you feel? What sent you to this OM? Did you fill out the questionnaire? Are you staying with your husband just because of your SAHM status? Please don't do that. Isn't fair to anyone, your husband, you, the OM, future OM. All of you deserve to be happy. I am also a SAHM. Quit my job to take care of a sick newborn, then a daughter that has heart failure and my dying mother. I was in charge of $50 million dollars worth of purchasing. I made more than he did. I was respected by many people. Now I don't even respect myself. I am so unsure of myself. I am embarrased. So many people always made comments about our marriage, how good it was, that they know we will always be together, how lucky I am to have him for a husband, what a great guy he is. Ha! What a joke that turned out to be. Joke's on me though, I guess. It scares me that I could actually harm myself rather than face a life without him. The kids, him, our family, they are my life and now half of that is gone. I don't have a college degree. Have some college. We met in college. He decided he wasn't going to return and I left at the same time because I couldn't imagine being away from him even for a year and a half. Now I can't get a job. Most places in my field require a college degree now. I can't get a lower level job because they look at my previous earnings and education and tell me I am over qualified. Then there is the fact that I haven't worked in ten years. I am now looking at returning to college, but that is hard with two kids in college and a little one that is used to having Mommy around. But I will never NEVER be in this position again, where I have to rely on someone else to live. I think the only reason my husband is still around is because he feels responsible for me. He knows I couldn't support myself. What a terrible feeling that is. I am a burden, an obligation to him. I want him here because I matter, because I am important to him, not out of some sense of responsibility. This is the lesson I have learned from this, you just can't rely on people, can't trust them, no matter what amount of time has gone by, no matter how well you think you know them.

You have the opportunity to spare your husband pain, humiliation, etc, yet you are not willing to do so. This REALLY puzzles me.

You really need to examine your feelings. No one wants to hurt another person, but the fact that you are claiming to want to spare the OM hurt, but seem more than willing to dump that hurt on your husband says something.

I am assuming you said something to the OM about ending it. He isn't respecting your wishes. I know you said that it isn't your responsibility to tell his wife. Did you try telling him that you had hoped to spare both of your spouses the pain of finding out about this, but if he doesn't respect your wishes to concentrate on your marriage and end this, that you will have no other choice? What would he say then? You are going to have to get the guts to do it though, if he still doesn't stop contacting you.

You really do need to think about what you want, and give your husband the opportunity to work on the marriage with you. He deserves this. If you don't then it really doesn't matter if you end this A or not, because if you aren't getting what you need from the relationship, then there will just be others.


I can only imagine what you are feeling. I am sure it has to be uncomfortable around your house with your husband, I imagine you feel guilty. Clearly it upsets you on some level otherwise you wouldn't have posted. Only you can stop all of this, but you have to be honest with yourself about what you want. Could be you don't really want the OM, but do you really want your husband? At some point, you had feelings for your husband, out of those past feelings, I would hope you would have enough respect for him to deal with him honestly, or at least to end the A and then work on getting out of your marriage. Have enough respect for yourself.

I hope you don't mind my little novel here. Please take the time to think about it. All of you deserve to be happy, to live fulfilled lives and the current one isn't the right way to go about it. It isn't fair for anyone involved, you, your husband, your kids, the OM.

allow me to tell you something, I agree that you are not a stupid wife, because if you are then so am I, maybe we have stupid moments, I left my husband just a few weeks ago, found out he had invited 5 women into our marriage, he still tells lies, its almost like it has become a lifestyle for him, where was I in all of this? I knew things were up, was I to busy raising my babies? I did kick him out a few times when I did find out about things, I just didn't know most of it until recently, then I only found out with interigation and threats of calling some of the other women, which he knew I would do. No one understands your hurt like most of us do, sometimes I think I just need to go to the hospital, I want a drug that will take away all my memory, everything, then somedays I feel ok, I know I am not a loser, I know that I am a vibrant wonderful person, I know this cause I have friends that are more then willing to tell me that, I never deserved what I got, I know this and niether did you, please, try to start feeling better, make yourself, go get something good done for yourself, start looking good, I have been married along time to, I will not regret raising my kids the way I did, that is the good thing that came out of it. I am choosing to pick the good, I will not continue to feel bitter and resentment and wish horrible disease on him and these women anymore, I will do fine and so will you, don't give anyone the pleasure of making you feel this bad about you.

Doingfine -

Thanks, you actually brought a smile to my face. I had not thought about wishing terrible disease on them. Now there's an idea. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> It would be great if there were some kind of pill to take to just make it all go away. I am going to start doing things just for me. I don't look half bad, as the construction worker that winked at me this afternoon let me know.

I appreciate your message.

Thats awesome,,,not that I really like to invite most cat calls but sometimes its almost needed. I hope and pray that we both feel good soon,,,my husband is kind of stalking me right now,,still lying and can't understand why I just want him to go away. Trust me I know it hurts. Lets make a pack to look good and feel good even if its for a few hours in a day,,,hang tough,,,let me know if you want to swap emails,,,I don't pretend to know it all but just getting it out will help.

Same reply that I posted in my post:

Sw, Thank you for writing this mini novel, the way you feel is the way my husband will probably feel when I tell him how I have failed him in this marriage. After reading your story it sounds similar to my story. I have been a SAHM for nine years now. This has been something that I have struggle with because now I'm ready to go back to work and my husband doesn't want me to go back. Lately, I have found being at home has been extremely lonely, which I have no friends. The people I talk to during the day are my children. I do take classes online, so when I do go back to work I can have something because when I research on jobs you are right most positions require you to have a degree. These companies don't care if you have taken time off to take care of your family. When they see the timespan of your last position being so many years they look right over your resume. SW, why don't you change your name to WofStupidHusband, you are not stupid. You have to see that you are the decent one in the marriage. It's not your fault that your husband choose to go outside the marriage. Just like it's not my husbands fault that I went outside our marriage. Any person who is in a marriage can fall into the trap of adultery. It's a temptation from the devil to try to break up marriages and destroy families. I had A because I was tempted to commit sin and I did not do what the Bible told me to do and that was to flee. I was weak and now this A has a stronghold on me, but it has nothing to do with my husband not being a good husband.

doing fine - I would love to swap emails. The private message thing doesn't work here I take it. I also wish they had a chat thing. That would be so helpful to me on these nights that I can't sleep. I will give you my hotmail account and then we can go from there. mommajayne@hotmail.com

Well, we had a talk. I had a list of prepared questions. Told him I needed truthful honest answers, wouldn't ask anything I didn't need to know. Told him if he didn't do this, I would take it as he was not willing to work on the relationship. While he told me some things, he kept on to some things. Does he truly not remember? I just don't get how that is even possible. He did lie about a crucial fact. Though I didn't find out at that time. He also insisted there was no intercourse. I had the feeling there was more, but no real proof. I called him the next day and told him that he could think until the evening and decide if he wanted to elaborate on any answers, correct any answers or tell me anything else.

He apologized and asked me to forgive him numerous times. He cried. I know he is hurting. It isn't fun for me to have to ask him these things repeatedly. He has been telling me it was nothing since I found out in October. Tells me it has been over since then. Yet I find out yesterday that he contacted her at the end of January or the beginning of February. At the end of January, he also drove past her house with OUR child in the vehicle. What is up with that? I asked why he did that and I am supposed to accept that he doesn't know why. It is supposed to be ok because he didn't stop there. Well, he didn't because he knew the kid was going to rat you out. He claims to have called her to beg her not to tell anyone about them. Felt that I was talking to someone who was giving me information. Yeah, whatever. He claims to have called her a previous time because she asked him to check in with her and let her know how he is. How ridiculous is that? The crucial fact he lied about is oral sex. I knew this took place someone had told me. He lied about where. Why? This is just crazy. He thought I would accept it better if I didn't know he went to her house. He did tell me about having sex with her. I already knew this, though my heart was hoping it wasn't true. But he kept denying that as well. I am not proud of how I got him to admit it. I consented to sex with him and while in the act, I asked him if she felt better than I did. More tears. I just can't understand. He says that he knew I knew, but doesn't understand why I can't understand how hard it would be for him to tell me about it. Well, why can't he understand how hard it is for me to ask. He asked if I could forgive him. For the A, yeah, most likely. For leaving me struggling with this for 5 1/2 months on my own. That is the one I am having trouble with. He just kept banking on it going away. I kept telling him as long as he wasn't truthful to me there was this wedge between us. I am grieving for what we had. I am grieving for the man I thought he was. I am disappointed in him. He works with some guys who have cheated. We had talked about it. How sad for the wife to have everyone know but her, and yet he does the same thing to me. I am sad that we will never be what we were. The total disrespect he showed me. He tells me he loves me. I tell him I love him too, but I just can't say right now if that is enough to keep us together. Had this all come out right in the beginning, we may have had a better shot. Right now, I don't know. I am trying very hard not to make any rash decisions that I will regret, but it is extremely hard to fight this desire I have just to run and run very fast away. Oh, bonus! No condoms were used so I get to further humiliate myself and go to my gyne to ask for some STD screenings.

I know you all are probably thinking stupid of me to have unprotected sex with him after all this, but we already were while it was going on and I wasn't aware so does it really matter?

I know he is remorseful and I feel for him, but I also have to worry about me. I need to get myself in a better place. Need to kick myself in the [censored] some so that I can quit taking responsibility for this. The fact that this is a skanky type of woman just makes it all the more hurtful. What must he think of me if he turned to a skank? He tells me he was weak. Ok, so next time she calls, what are you going to do? All of the sudden you are going to be strong?
Emotions are just all over the place. I do feel better that most of it is out. I feel worse that he knowingly let me suffer all this time without coming clean, and I am worried about the future. If we can't talk and we can't be honest with each other, what is the sense? We have been through several scary things that can lead to divorce, the seriousness of our daughter's health condition probably the greatest, but I don't know about this. I am just so tired of tyring to fix it by myself. I am so tired of vomitting. I am so tired of nightmares, or exhaustion. I am just tired.

I have been invited to go out Friday by a friend. Not sure what I am going to do. I told her yes, but then I worry that he will think I am going to be looking for a retalitory. Then I think, well, why should I concern myself with what he is worried about? He didn't want to do anything to help me with my worries for the past 9 1/2 months.

I just really am grateful that this place exists.

first of all,,there is not much to say about someone that would cheat with a married person, are they nice people? noooo. The problems are the lies, they just think if they can keep telling them that eventually it will go away, and in my case 17 yrs! the sooner its caught the better it is, all you have to do is know that he loves you and you love him and it can work. hang in there. P.S. I sent you an email, let me know how you are doing today

I haven't posted in a while. Things aren't going all that well. I don't think anyway. I started going to counseling. Had asked him to go with, he declined, so decided to go on my own. Therapist asked him to go in. He was hesitant but agreed to go if "I wanted him to". I told him, I didn't "want" him to, that would be like making him, but if he thought it could be beneficial, that I would appreciate it.

He thinks I should just forget the A ever happened. I would feel so much better and we could just move on from here. This is just insane to me. So what do I say next time? Forget that one as well? Admitted in therapy that the last time he talked to her was towards the end of April. So many lies, which one is the truth? Is this one een the truth? Therapist told him therapy isn't going to work if he isn't truthful. They had an individual session and he said he told her things were going great, that we had been working on us. I found this almost humorous as I don't even know what we are supposed to be working on.

A few more sessions have gone by and I talked to the therapist again today to ask what she was thinking about keeping our last discussion going in the vein it was. Seems to be sidetracking away from the A and towards his parents. She said it was because that was what we came in with. I told her no, that was what he came in with. She had asked how we were when we walked in, his said, great, she said, "well, she doesn't look so great." He told her "Oh, she is upset oversomething I told her my mother said." She called him out for dismissing my feelings and also how some past actions were betrayals, minor, nothing compared to the A, but betrayals nonetheless.

I had earlier in the day written my h a letter telling him how I was feeling and that I was shocked that he said I was great because I don't feel that way. etc.

Therapist says she has to tell me that he is showing no understanding of the gravity of this issue.

She has no confidence that therapy is helping us because he is not being truthful, he is not comprehending why this was wrong, or he just may not care. He is very closed off.

Thinks something is still going on. If it isn't still going on, it is extremely likely to happy again especially with his behaviour in therapy, most likely with same person, perhaps another.

She said, "I think if you were to cut him loose, he would be at her house in a half an hour."

Said she would recommended that I start to think if this marriage, the way it currently is, is what I want, if my feelings are worth it.

She said she knows this isn't pleasant for him to deal with, but everything is out in the open, supposedly, and he has stated that it wasn't as bad as he thought it was going to, yet he remains very guarded almost seems unwilling to commit, she wonders what more is left to hide?

So I guess my question is, what do I do now?


I also have a sex question, but didn't know if it was appropriate to post it. This would be directed to fwh's.

Thanks for any and all suggestions, comments.

stupidw

Did the two of you ever send a NC letter? Did you ever expose this A to anyone? Do you know much about the OW-where she lives, is she in a relationship?

How do you know he has broken off with her? Do you know when all this really first started? Was it back when she hit on him years ago? Why did she move back to your town? Was she persuing him? He doesn't sound like he is being open with you. Are you still keeping track of his activities? Maybe you have already answered all this, but I did not see it in this thread.
Lake

No he refused to send a letter, refused to make a phone call.

No, I haven't exposed it to anyone. She is divorced, lives with sister. Though she sleeps around, she was sleeping with someone else when she was sleeping with him, I don't believe she is in a relationship. I do know where she lives. Have all the phone numbers. Was thinking of calling her from his cellphone to see how she answered and how she sounded. Surprized to hear from him, or expecting it.

He claims one day he just quit calling her. This sounds crazy to me. She never wondered what happened? Never tried to contact him? Makes no sense to me. If someone dropped me like that I would like to know what the heck happened. He did say that after I first found out, he did call her to say he was going to stay with me. I asked how she responded when he called her the next day. He said she didn't respond in any particular manner. I asked, "She didn't say, I thought we were through?" He said she didn't say anything like that.

She didn't move back to our town, but one about 30 minutes away. I don't know when or the time frame between when she did and when this started. He claims nothing ever happened before and of course he claims there was not any flirting, etc, years earlier, I was just being ridiculous. She was a "friend".

I am not making myself crazy trying to keep track of him. I did that and all it did was make me crazy. He quit using his cell to call her, called her from work. He also has his own side business, so I never really know where he is.

Yeah, he hasn't been open at all. Claims he doesn't remember.

No I am not sure about anything.

put a GPS on his vehicle

I bet'cha he's still seeing OW

you do need to know

*LINK HERE to GPS info*

Don't pressure
coax
argue
cry
whine
complain
.... or, have long drawn out "talks"

not any more

you get irrefutable proof using the GPS

then you present him with the info - calmly - and you say:

"Now it is decision time. Do you want to be married, or not.?
I assure you, I will not remain married to a man who is not willing to be faithful and honest with me."

Well, we did have a talk Saturday night. Saturday was really hard for me, especially after talking to therapist on Friday and her pretty much echoing my concerns. Then I went to buy a Father's Day card and seems like every one I touched said something about growing closer through the years, what a great relationship we have, etc.

Was an interesting conversation, though I really think that he is just blowing smoke up my [censored], telling me what he thinks I want to hear.

He states that he was just weak. But when I ask what the weakness was, can't really tell me. When I ask him how this won't happen again, tells me because he said so. Says he wasn't thinking. Yet when I ask him if me or our family ever came into his mind during this, he says all the time.

When I ask him why he continued after I found out, he gave me a different response than the typical, I don't know, I was stupid. He says that I accepted it. Previous answers were, I don't know, I thought I already lost you. Yet he says he was afraid of losing me. I said, you were so afraid of losing me that you continued behaviour that would guarantee that you would? He said he isn't carrying on with her anymore so doesn't understand what my issue is. I told him well, you told me that numerous times before and that turned out to be a lie, I am supoosed to believe you now? I asked what gave him the impression that I accepted it and he said, I was acting like such a loving wife, etc. My Plan A.

Accepted it! When I found out, I packed his stuff up and put it in his van. He was at work. Firefighter. Shift day. In the evening, he asked for a trial seperation. Told him no. I know sounds contradictory for packing his stuff, but he was too willing to go so I backed off. I asked and have previously asked why he didn't come home. Seemed like that would have been a pretty important thing to do if he really wanted to keep our family together. Says he doesn't know, he couldn't, wich is bs. This time he says he was scared. Of what? He had to realize sooner or later he was going to see me/talk to me.

Also tells me he knows he wouldn't have ended up with her long term. I asked why and he said because he knows what she is. When I said, but your short term plan was to go to her? He says he can't say because it didn't happen. BS. She was so nasty he wouldn't spend the rest of his life with her, but she was good enough to risk our marriage for?

Claims he never ever thinks of her, doesn't know why he drove by her house on the way home from dropping my daughter off at college, while it was clearly a thought out thing, she isn't on the way, he had to take an entirely different route, but doesn't know why he did it. Wasn't thinking.

Says he loves me and wants to be with me. Well that was the same thing he said when I was sure that he was still carrying on with her and he was telling me he wasn't. I asked if he was aware that I knew it was still going on while he was giving me this response and he said yes. I asked why couldn't he tell me and he said because he knew it was wrong. Am I the only one that this doesn't make sense to?

liars lie

get the GPS on his vehicle and STOP the drawn out discussions

they are NOT Plan A

hello, i'm sorry we have to meet here.

i think he is confused but still seeing ow

please listen to pepperband and read on Plan A

{{{{{stupidw}}}}}

denise