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#1857820 04/10/07 12:26 AM
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Has anyone ever raised the idea to the MB techie group of the existence of a invite only or private forum?

I know it has some drawbacks and there would certainly be some gains, I have noticed many instances of where the snooping WS discovers the BS seeking help and has no choice but to terminate posting here or going into hiding.

Maybe make it somewhat like only members that have been here awhile or members who have been discovered.

Several people come to mind where this has happened because the BS didn't know how to cover thier tracks to protect thier support group.

What does anyone else think?


FBH 34 me,FWW 34,
DS 14, OC-D 12 (given up for adoption), DS-8, DD-5
D-Day#1 10-12-1998
D-Day#2 2-10-2008
Recovered!
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I hate to sound stupit but what is a WS and a BS?

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yeah! thought of that tonight actually when I was making my thread,,,I left out details of my plan just in case WS was reading the site,,,you mind reader you


Me-49 and staying there, course AARP sent me my card ugh
H-49
DD and SIL
GS the light of my life! 1 and a half, full of you know what
DS med school
always working on me
•The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated. Ghandi
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still dont know what it is

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BS - betrayed spouse
WS - wayward spouse
OW - other woman
OM - other man
LB - love buster
DJ - disrespectful judgement
DS - domestic support
SF - sexual fulfillment
RH - radical honesty
SAHM - stay at home mom

If you look at some of the other forums, you may find a thread about abbreviations at the top of the list.

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RMX - "Private Forums" are unlikely for basically the same reason that the system does not allow Private Messages.

If you really want an "invite only" or a "one on one" place to talk, it already exists and is called "email." You can invite someone, or several people, to send you an email and discuss whatever it is you want to discuss via email.

But there also IS a private section on MB for those who are counseling with the Harleys and there are other forums on MB that could be thought of as "semi-private" in that they get VERY little traffic from most members.

You concern about a spouse reading is a real concern. For most, however, they are not even aware of the existance of MB unless they are told about it by the spouse who IS posting here. That works for some, but in general it is not recommended that a spouse seeking help here should tell their spouse about MB until later in recovery. While an affair is ongoing, this becomes a "refuge" of sorts for those who ARE interested in saving their marriage despite the activities of the WS, or for WS's who have recognized that they need to end their affair or have ended their affair and want to stay married to their spouse.

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There is discussion at MB about the ability to have private forums, etc. FH is correct about the private section for those that are counseling with the Harleys. But, the ability to go to a private section is being talked about at MB. It may not happen. But then again, it might. There are a lot of considerations.


Standing in His Presence

FBS (me) (48)
FWW (41)
Married April 1993...
4 kids (19(B), 17(G), 14(B), 4(B))
Blessed by God more than I deserve
"If Jesus is your co-pilot...you need to change seats!"

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Related to the discussion: My wife discovered the MB forums by taking select terms I used in discussions and then researched them using the Google search engine. That's how she found the site in my case.


BS (Me) - 33 WW - 31 Married 14 years, together 17 Daughter: 16 yrs old Separated: 12/29/06 D-Day: 2/2/07, EA/PA With Co-Worker Plan B Started: 3/6/07 D filed by WW: 4/18/07 Olive Branch offered (Plan B resumed after): 8/8/07 R Attempt by WW: 9/1/07 NC Established: 9/4/07 NC Broken: 9/5/07, 9/6/07 Status: Plan B, Pt. II (9/10/07)

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