My wife is going thru some kind of depression. She says she is not happy with her life. She wants for nothing, and has everything going for her. Nothing I do is good enough for her. I get fussed at every day for something and minor as not answering the phone, fast enough, to Yesterday she called me (during work at least 15 times a day) and I said I had to call her back. Well it was about 10 min later and she texed me. I finished my conversation and called her. I got the biggest butt chewing bec. according to her I only called her bec. she texed me. Which was not the case, I just happended to finish my conversation for work. Anyway I had to hear how much I dont love her, how much she hates her life, etc.etc.etc. This past week I went camping with my son, I wasnt going to go, she thought is was good for us. Well she called when we were camping, we talked for 15 min. I told her everyone was waiting on me, we were going to go and she would not let me off the phone, saying they were more important than her, bla bla bla. I hung up on her. When I got home she wanted to kick me out of the house. I cant initiate the hang up on the phone, she gets pissed. She can sit on the phone and say nothing but if I have to go, look out. I get told she wants to kick me out of the house every week. I am getting tired of this and might take her up on this soon.

hmmm.... could it be that it is her time of the month? Hate to ask, but I know that I can be a bit pissy sometimes during/around that time....

It sounds like major depression, and your wife needs help. Please demonstrate a loving approach by sitting down with her and expressing your genuine care and concern. It's possible that she may need medication to help her, but only a doctor can make that call. Whatever you do, don't ignore these indicators. Ask to drive and go with her to the doctor. Since she sounds needy, your offer to help and support her at this time will be a huge comfort to her. Please don't abandon her at this time - it's the cruelest thing you could do.

Sounds like there are communication issues and couples therapy would be helpful as well. I'd suggest a two-pronged approach: both a medical MD and/or psychiatrist to evaluate the need for medication and individual therapy, and a psychologist specializing in couples or marital counseling.

I wish you both well,

She is already on medication for depression. She is always wanting me to change. At the same time blaming me for all of her unhappiness. Tonite I was at home and the bank statement came in and I started to reconcile it. She ate and said she would take over. I got up and went eat. Well sure enough a little while later she started hollaring at me for starting doing the bills. She said she was having a good evening until I sarted doing the bills. I didnt ask for her help, and I was only reconciling the bank statement. Well that was all my fault. But I am supposed to take all of the hollaring and name calling and not say nothing in response, (which usually I dont). Then she said she guesses she looks like the bi--h because I dont say anything. I was only trying to help, not piss her off. I am not talking to her and she went to bed. She even got mad at me one day bec. she found out I used this website for help. I had to tell her that I deleted my account. She wanted to get my name so she could read what I have written since I have been here but I wouldnt give it to her. I really dont know what to think or do anymore. I am getting real tired but I do have 2 kids to think about. Oh and she doesnt like any of my friends, that i am not allowed to do anything with anymore.

um.... IC2... honestly there are many cases where the wife is abusive to the husband and from all the things you have shared this is really what it sounds like. Is she this way to the kids too? Do the kids see her treating you in this manner? What type of example do you think the kids are getting for their lives in the future?
just a couple questions to ponder.... LIC

Yes she is this way in front of the kids. I dont say anything to get her going. Not a very good example at all. She just goes off some times. And today she told me she was sorry for acting that way and she missed me sleeping next to her last nite. I stayed away from her on my side of the bed. I cant figure it out.

IC2.... it is great that she apologized, but that does not null the facts of what happened... the pain is still there.... have you guys gone to counseling and discussed this aspect of your relationship? Words can be very damaging and your children are at an age where they are taking in everything that happens. You guys can turn this around and start to fix it, but it requires both of you first realizing you have a problem.

if your wife were coming up to you and slicing you with a knife rather than saying hurtful things would you allow her to continue? probably not... right? well why should the actions she is taking be okay to continue?
LIC

Well we are here again. She read my work email and the sect. sent me a joke email. So I have been getting chewed out for everything I have done wrong the last year today. I didnt even get the email, so I dont know what my wife is talking about. My wife has my work address and can read my email remotely but I didnt get the email. That makes it even worse. She is like the energizer bunny just keeps going and going. Fussing and fussing and doesnt stop. I have chest pains trying to talk to her. I really dont know what to do or say any more.

I am not doing anything wrong and I am getting accused of everything. Now she hates me and its my fault she will not have a good weekend. And its my fault she is depressed. Its my fault bec. im not planning a vacation for this summer, so i must not want to spend time with her, etc.ect.

She has always planned the vactions. I said whatever she wanted would be fine.

I am really getting tired of bieng the cause for everything.

Maybe if I wouldnt be their she would see that I am not the cause.

Get into marriage counseling, and start hashing this out now. Don't put it off, make it a PRIORITY.

If she refuses, tell her that you're not doing this for her, you're doing it for you, and for the kids. Don't tell all the reasons WHY you need marriage counseling, just tell her that things are to a point where you NEED it for your marriage to survive.

And consider family counseling as well, given that all of this has gone on in front of the kids.