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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 215
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 215 |
I have just started to read Surviving an Affair and the opening chapters are very close to what I'm experiencing with my wife.
Is it a good idea to get her to read it as well.
Yes (100%, 1 Votes)
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No (0%, 0 Votes)
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Together 10 Years
Married 14 Febuary 04
DD 6 March 2007
DS8 & DS9
BS 38(me)
WS 39
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464 |
Not if she is still active in her affair.
You could show her the Infidelity FAQ's on this site though
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 566
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 566 |
IMHO it wouldn't do much good. I printed out copies of the Infidelity articles from MB and put it on the table. WS would occassionally take it up and read, and can still remember those times I didn't want to disturb it, like reading it was going to give her an "AHA!" moment and break the spell of the fog. It gave her some stuff to think about, but in the end I don't think it did much good in my case. Your mileage may vary <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Dev
BS - 31 (me)
WW - 29
M ~2 years, No kids
DDay - 2nd Dec 2006
Exposed - 15th Jan 2007
NC started - 14th Jan 2007
NC broken 23rd Jan 2007
NC broken many times since
Status: WS moved out 22 March 07 "to think"; A ongoing still; 2nd July 2007 - signed Divorce papers "I'm done!"
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,058
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,058 |
Chris,
If the A has ended and she has completed withdrawal and is really committed to rebuilding the M, then reading it is a good choice. That is, if she is already actively working on recovery, it might help her. OTOH, HN/HN or FIL/SIL might be a better choice to introduce the MB concepts.
If she is still engaged in an A, then I would not suggest that she read it, because you will lose your advantage of knowing the plan you are trying to execute. It would be like giving your opponent in the Super Bowl your play book two weeks before the game. It also would only make her feel more polarized, more of a case of him vs. me and since she would still be too foggy for it to sink in, would be a waste of time.
JMO
Mark
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