Hello..I am new here so let me get started. My husband and I were married when we were 19, before he went to Iraq, so we have been married for 4 years. Weve had our ups and downs, I'm not perfect because I kept begging him to talk to me and spend time with me, he never did. Then I fell in love with my bff because he always listen to me. But, I never left my husband and I told him about it and I wanted us to work out. I didn't feel this way until he left me and he said that he wasnt in love with me last year. He came back a month later and we worked it out. So we were both wrong. Then he wanted me to stop talking to my bff, which I did. 4 months ago I just bought him a brand new diamond wedding band and everything seem fine.. Then in February, were kinda of having problems and we talked about separting, but nothing leading to divorce. He recently got a military job in Maryland and every since then he has changed. He told me that he wasnt in love with me anymore and he was emailing other women and he was on myspace and he was listed single on it. I am devasted. I gave him the space that he asked for then last week he said that he thought we should just be friends and that he wanted a divorce, and that maybe things could change in a few months or years, only time will tell. I could he make a huge decision like that within a week, I have asked to go to counseling and a marriage retreat and he won't do it. I will be getting my degree next month and I want him back but then again I don't because this is his second time doing this. What should I do? Will he come back to me? help

Welcome to MB <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Hmmm... well two wrongs never add up to a right. Perhaps somebody more versed in all this will chime in.

If you are committed to saving your M, and you have NO CONTACT with OM, then I'm guessing the veterans here will suggest Plan A for you. If he's involved with somebody, it's time to expose it.

If he's saying that maybe down the road, etc., it sounds like he's engaged in "cake eating" - keeping you on the hook but playing the field at the same time. Not good.

You might want to post this thread in General Questions II because you're not divorcing/divorced yet and you'll see more traffic on that forum, and the good and caring folks there can give you some suggestions.

What changed you back from wanting to be with your OM, to saving your marriage? Undoubtedly someone on GQII will ask you that.

In support,

JinGA

Yeah, JinGA had a point there.

warning warning will robinson!!!!

My STBX said the exact same thing, when her A started Heating up! I would Move our post to Gen Q... Then start digging for the A, I bet a fresh 20 WH has a gal in the bullpen warming up...

Jim