please see my thread

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From Penalty Kill

I've seen your thread. Did you read medc's post?

Eav, my father's cousin lived with a woman for over ten years without marrying her because she would have lost benefits had they married. She was not a divorcee, but a widow. But the OW in your case may be receiving alimony that will end if she remarries.

But, so what? Your life is about you, not the OW, not your extremely wayward husband who has been gone from your life for years and shows no sign of returning.

Eav, in the past you have been unreceptive to any post that suggests that you live a life for yourself without being "worried" or "confused" about your WH. You say that you are moving on in your own way and in your own time, but over and over you post the same things which show that your WH remains front and center in your life. Here again you are worrying about a divorce because of something you discovered that happened last year. You are manufacturing a way to make your H and his possible actions something for you to obsess over. But it keeps him in your life, which is the point.

That's fine. It's your life, your choice to live it the way you want to. It's scary to do things, to decide to live your life to the fullest. It's more safe and secure to cling to what you know.

To wait for Godot.