Hello everyone! I am a newbie here as well as a new wife. I guess it seems too soon for problems to be arising which is why I joined here. My husband and I just married in November. I grew up in a Christian home and his father is a pastor. The problem I am having is with a career change that could potentially change our lives forever. I know it may seem small but we have never been apart in three years. New career could call for months away from home any time of the year. Please pray for me and my husband and that he will make the right decision regarding me and our marriage. I am torn because I have to try to be supportive and agree to him leaving for a month or longer when we have only been married for 5 months. Plus, I am going into a new job and I need him during this transition. My husband says it's for financial reasons but jobs aren't guarenteed in this career move. I try to be supportive but I can't do it! Everytime I try, I just get upset and we end up arguing. I am not upset because he is going for his dreams but of what our lives will become after this whole thing. Thinking of throwing in the towel already just so he can be free to pursue his dreams. Pray for us! BTW, I just bought POPW to help aid me in my journey for a stronger marriage.

BW,

Both of you will be prayed for. If your H were to read this, I would like to tell him to really reconsider this postion. One because you are not in complete agreement about it. The other is, from an outside perspective, it seems like the job is more important than the marriage.

I don't know how much more money he would be making, but I would ask him if the amount he is making is worth the possibility of destroying his M to you. Traveling is rarely good for a M and unless the two of you have developed a very strong bond between the two of you, separation making the heart grow fonder is not always the case. Sometimes it distances the heart.

Being the child of a pastor is rarely easy, so many expectations. But if he has understood the love of Christ then he would know that God will be more inclined to bless him if he places his M as a higher priority than his.

I swore I would not get married until I could support a W. The day I got back from my honeymoon, I was removed as the manager of the store where I worked. Essentially cutting my income in half. God wanted to show me that he is the one that can be counted on to provide. I ended up being unemployed for over a year shortly after that.

The "love of money is the root of all kinds of evil." I would attempt to tell him not to chase after to wealth, but chase your wife and strengthen your M. Then together, seek blessings. You've got plenty of time.

Anyway. Prayers and blessings to you and your H.

S&C

Thank you so much S&C for your advice and prayers. We have been talking about this situation for about 1 month or so. Doesn't seem like a long time but to me seems like an eternity. The emotional stress is draining. Surprisingly, we have already been talking about the fact that it makes me feel abandoned and that I feel that he is chasing money instead of a happy marriage and family.

The more I try to explain to him, the more he feels like I am taking something, "his dream" , away from him. He constantly is fighting me on this one and we can't agree either way.

He is very family oriented and I know that his parents won't approve of this which is probably why he hasn't told them. He is supposed to be leaving for California in June. We live in Florida. I told him that I am just not ready to deal with this seperation right now and maybe after we have built our marriage more then we could consider him doing this.

The other thing is he always talks about having a family and babies but I can't bring myself to do this because I don't want to be in a situation where he is always traveling or away and I am raising the family alone.

Anyway, thanks again for your prayers. BTW the career change is acting. A great dream for him except not the most logical choice for us right now.