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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 6
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 6 |
I wanted advice on my situation.
I am 43, H is 36. No kids - that is an issue. Only options for having kids is adoption or surrogacy. We have been M 4 years, together 7.
He began an EA beginning of Nov. I found out & it became a PA in Dec. It is long distance. They have flown back & forth & seen each other about 5 times. I moved out at the start of February. I wasn't able to do Plan A while living with him - just didn't have it in me.
Since I moved out I have been doing Plan A - talking a lot on the phone and seeing him on occasion. He tells me he really values the friendship we have reestablished but he needs more time to think about things - esp the kids issue. He isn't sure he wants to adopt.
He has told me things aren't going well with the OW & she is not planning on moving here at this time (as she was at first). He has indicated their R has become quite rocky - but he hasn't given her up.
I plan to go forward with the divorce by the end of June so I can start to adopt as a single person. I told him if he ends it with her that I will wait on the D - but that I need to see some action on his part.
My question is, I think he is seeing that I can meet his needs, so should I go to plan B to let him see what his reality will be like without me in it? Currently he calls me all the time - we talk on the phone several times a day or see each other at work (we work together).
Opinions?
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Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463
Member
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Member
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463 |
How can you listen to these things that he says about OW?
I don't think that you are ready for Plan B...just my 2 cents...I think thatyou need to PLan A more...work on yourself...be all that you can be...
Pre-A what was the M like?
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Member
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Member
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996 |
Plan A for now ... too soon for B
what are his parents like?
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