Plan A still applicable when WW moves out? My WW moved out now 3 months ago, and has been living in her own apt. for about a month. I'm starting to wonder if she's now in a state of ambivalence regarding our M? She shared w/ me that she's reading the book "Too Good To Leave, Too Bad To Stay". I've read the reviews for it, and a thread here in the ENs section, and it has helped me make more sense of my WW. A valid explaination for all her "secrecy" since she moved out could be not wanting to be in the M any more, not necessarily another A. Since the full blown A I discovered was long over when I found out, she may be back in the state of having one foot out the door of the M.

Before the A, she was so unhappy in the M, and was struggling with leaving me. Unfortunately she made the poor choice to have an A, but now I believe she may be back to the state of unhappiness w/ the M, hence the separation. I know most of my posts only point out the negative things about my WW, but there is much that I'm seeing that shows she's trying to do what's right. Maybe her "fog" is lifting since my filing for D and custody, which I have told her I do not want to follow through on and have left the door open for reconciliation.

She shared w/ me for the 1st time ever this weekend how she regrets taking the easy way in allowing the OM to fill in what was missing in our M. She said she knows she could have talked to me more clearer, communicated better, and stood up to me more in expressing how I was ruining our M. She actually admitted to allowing herself to become vulnerable to this OM, and I sensed a little remorse coming through. The mistakes I'm owning, that I've been telling her all along since D-Day and learning from MB, is how I took her for granted, neglected her, made her feel like an outsider in our family of me & 2 boys (geek movies, video games, etc.), not appreciating her, not giving her my undivided attention, etc. She says she is just so afraid to have her heart broken again if she were to return. I guess I have to continue to be patient and allow her to see that I've truly changed for good, not just temporarily to win her back, only to go return to my old self. These things take time, no? LOTS of time, as I'm starting to realize more, that this will be a very long road to recovery, should she decide to join me on that path.

Thanks for any advice you can offer me, as I believe I'm at a crossroads on whether to move forward w/ the D, or give our M another chance.