WW finally agreed to MC and IC.

Please any final minute advise before we go into counselling? Counsellor is pro maggiage and reputed to be versed in the art similar to SH.

Please pray for me thx.

A lot of times WWs are extremely defensive, so be very gentle and talk about how WE can improve the marriage. Don't insinuate D or anything like that, but frame it under how BOTH of you can improve the marriage.

thanks i am going now......that means a world to me

Also...dont bring up the past right now. She will! But you dont. Remember the Harley focus is the future, not the past. So, the idea is on how to make a marriage that both of you need and want in the future...NOT rehashing the mess of the past!

Good luck. Prayers for you both!

This may help...my WW mentioned to me her reluctance to work on the M is b/c she fears it'll end up happening "my way". I then explained to her why I strongly feel we should see a MC, that we need an objective expert to help us BOTH.

So, try to avoid making her feel like this is happening "your way".

SP,MM

Thanks nufff (alot), well i ammmmmm baaaaacckk!

So it didnt go quite as planned (to say the least) but i smiled knowingly as i saw the book HNHN on the shelf beside him. So here goes.....

Ding,Ding.........Round 1

MC : How can i help.

Me: We have issues with son and also difficulty with communicating w/ each other.

MC: HMmmmmmm.........explain.

So i launched into the difficult past year w/o bringing up OM or A to him and the reading up of SH materials and the help i need to improve myself.

MC: Hmmmmmmmm...........i see (DO they teach "hmmmmm" at the medical facility?).......anything to add WW?

So as predicted WW launch into her "speech"

I tried not to keel over laughing.......

MB is sooooo good in giving us the WS script ahead of opening episode.

as it continued , i realize the true nature of her wanting to leave.....apparently WW sorta met OM last week by the office and DS blurted out in their conversation..."My daddy said NOT TO TALK TO YOU, YOU ARE AN EVIL MAN"


(OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD................please dont make me burst out laughing!!)

didnt even had to point out OM in a line up, DS just knew.......funny isnt it.


So exposure to OMW didnt work..."they are just friends" she said.........hah!

Anyway. WW was shocked when i agreed to her wanting to leave. i said to WW "Look....i would move heaven and earth, go ****** and back....even KILL anybody that mess with my Family.... but once my other half wants to leave...i will step aside and lay down my sword"

WW looked stunned.

MC: Well are you two planning to DV or work on your M because it look like you both have made it a foregone conclusion.

WW: Well i am not talking about DV, just time away to sort out myself and to not be under the same roof.But we can still call and talk to each other and be a family

(Where DO THEY BUY THEIR SCRIPT?)

Me: No i cant...... I need time to heal and grieve. I cant talk or see you for now.

WW: Yes you can

MC: No he doesnt........(ding,ding...WW suffers a lightbulb moment)

MC: How is he now at home?

WW: Excellent

oh excuse me guys...............WW jus called (3rd. time now)

WW: Well i hope we can work out the future and be together.

ME: Hmmmmmmmmmm

(SO NOT!)

ME: There cant be 3 persons in a relationship. So i wont stop you. I tried for nine months to fight for our M so now i lay down my sword.

This is what you said you want and i respect your wishes.

So in all that 1.5 Hr. Drama......Why do the ****** i feel so happy about going into plan B?

trying to change the subject topic, little help here please.

NC:

That went well.

Plan B may happen soon. However.

Lightbulbs for WS are always good things.

Nice Sword. Always nice to know when its time to lay it down.

And if WS knows this, it decision time for her.

And WS hate to make decisions. And really hate it when others start making decisions for them.

Good Decision NC.

LG

Hi NC!

I think you did good. Consider not answering the phone when your W calls. Let her cogitate for the afternoon.

-ol' 2long

LG,

It is almost like a relief.........when my heart says enough!

It is my 6 y.o that i will now cry for.........funny when MC said " Well if you both get back together or if i decide to move on ....i must make sure change is geniune"

WW ask about changing for her.....MC said no offence but i cant "do this for you. Has to be for himself"

And trust me.....Because of MB....I have changed tremendously.


but in all the drama.......i am scared in not knowing what to do for my 6 y.o.


any advice?..........i honestly want to be a great dad and not someone he is dissappointed in years later.

sometime i cant help but feel worthless from the "father angle"

ever had that feeling that you could have done something more for them?

Simple:

Always stay vigilant. Keep improving yourself. Keep standing up for truth and integrity, and treat others fairly and thoughtfully.

And you will never go wrong.

-ol' 2long

2Long

"Consider not answering the phone when your W calls. Let her cogitate for the afternoon."

****snicker,snicker******

could actually HAVE FUN DOING this! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Well she just called B4 i read this so.......DANG...theres go another oppertunity. ah well......theres always THAT other call <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Remember not 2 play games, though. I'm not suggesting you play games with her. Just that, if it bothers you that she keeps calling, or if you think that by answering you're just helping her avoid really looking inward, then don't answer. You don't have 2 be in constant contact, even if you're madly in love. Live does go on, regardless. There are jobs 2 do, lawns 2 mow, kids 2 feed and nur2re.

-ol' 2long

IS it not wierd when you actually agree with a WS and they give you the look of "OK whats the game plan here?"

actually feel good to let them guess for awhile.

I am starting to LIKE the OM married and all to his "intelligent" W. Hey maybe......just maybe WW likes being 2nd. in all things pure and true.
including relationships!

K 2long......OK

No games....ok ........

Just some stuffi wanted to do......like finally getting that SUV, (need my own transportation,WW sorta claimed the car........i am fine with that)

and starting my model aircraft business (profile flying WW2 scale models-all balsa)

the possibilities to do things are endless...and also keeps me out of "trouble"

Hey cool...

My son and I have dabbled in RC planes. He's got a trainer that he's flown a number of times (with the Hobby shop owner as an instructor on the weekends), and we both started building electric RC planes. I wanted 2 build a Fokker triplane, silly me. It's still not done!

But we've been distracted by other things for the past few years, so the planes haven't been touched.

Now, we're restoring my other Model A Ford, which is a bit more expensive than the RC models! But my son is 20 now, and more interested in cars than RC airplanes.

-ol' 2long

So OMW is perfectly fine with OM hanging out with a woman he used to have SF with and wants to leave her H for?

Don't worry, your WW will come CRAWLING back after just a short time in plan B. Get her a plan B letter to make it official. With OM recently married, your WW will come crawling back if OM doesn't jump at her right away (and hopefully he won't be able to because his W will be watching him, regardless of what she says).

lets hope so JM i kinda still love her. So i will be doing may exam studies on "plan B 101".......hoping to swat and pass.

I know that i am ready for it because unfortunately my LB$ is in the red.

So what do yall do fer fun round ere?

I am a bit giddy though i must confess. I feel a burden being lifted off my shoulder. I can seriously focus on myself......for a change.

Is it freedom?........should i feel shame? Hey it has been 9 months of plan A.

I think that i am just about done. She still is at home and her head looks like it is spinning. I am still loving her right up till she has gone.......Then....i go dark...can we say ....."ghost recon?"

Maybe i can go to Negril......Chill out for the weekend.

Oh yes......she is fine with it. lets say that she is a .....ummmm...errr.....society woman?......a doting society woman.

What would a little greenback editor know about her prominent loving H that has been thru the SAME thing that i am going thru now? How can he possibly put another humanbeing thru the same thing?....yadda,yadda, bla,bla..black sheep have you any wool....sorry wrong forum.

So JM i am not fighting anymore.....guess mimi was right. They just went further underground and hid obvious trails.

I am not into this though......i am praying that God is working on her heart and help her find her way.

But i feel that i cant stay. I am sorta ok with her finding herself.