Thanks, off to read it.

I so want to e-mail OW at her new e-mail account to tell her to stay away and to let her know that DH told me about the e-mail.

Give me some good reasons why can't I e-mail her??? I won't let on that I'm planning on exposing her. I just want her to know that DH is telling me everything. Is there anything wrong with that?

I know I am all over the place. Things had been going smoothly until now.

I have a draft of what I will say to the DH and follow the script.

I also drafted an e-mail to OW, simply saying:

"I believe he has been VERY clear with you, he wants no contact with you. On Friday, he was just making polite conversion with your daughter.


Stay away. Do not contact him again."

This lets her know that I know about the conversation with her daughter and her recent e-mail.

I haven't sent it yet...

I'm no expert, but I would think that even telling her that would alert her to the possibility of "maybe" being exposed and gives her time to come up with some really good stories, etc...and a new email account.

I think keeping quiet until the entire payload is dropped will be quite more effective.

But when I expose I have the e-mails from her old account that she used to e-mail DH from which was her primary e-mail account and her husband knows about this account. Don't ask how I know...

All things on hold.

While I was on this computer, my dogs got out any our much loved corgi was hit by a car.

things are very sad right now.

BF, hoping that your dog is doing ok. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

As far as exposure, I would just pick up the phone and call the man without delay. There is no reason to delay and no reason to analyze this to death. Just do it and get it over with. AFTER you have exposed to him, THEN tell your H. If you tell him beforehand, that gives him an opportunity to forewarn the OW and you don't want that. If she is going to expose him at work, she can do that no matter where she lives. So that is not a legitimate reason to delay.

In the meantime, you need to put a stop to the OW contacting your H. Everytime she contacts your H is a new temptation for him to overcome. When the inevitable weak moment hits, he may not resist. You may be able to prevent this if her H knows and there are 2 people watching from both ends. But until her H knows, she is free to contact your H at will.

I would suggest that you give the man your FULL NAME and contact information so that you can stay in touch with him. Touching base with him will help ensure that contact does not resume.

Get er done, BF!

Dog died immediately. Such a sad day.

In my upset, angry at myself that I was focusing on her when the doggies got out, I fired off an e-mail to her. Just telling her to stay away and not to contact him again.
She has not replied.

You are right, she could make trouble just as easy from across the country as she could from here.

I can't do it tonight, still to upset about the dog. I'll call tomorrow.

Thanks everyone.

Sorry to hear about your dog. I know how hard it is to lose one.

Has your husband written her a no contact letter? That is a must.

Also expose to her husband. He deserves to know what his wife is up to.

Just wanted to express my sympathies about your pooch.

So, so sorry.

BrighterFuture, so sorry to hear about your dog.

Thanks Maz for bumping and linking gsh's thread on 'how to expose'.

I, too wanted to "tell that OW a thing or two". Don't waste your precious brain power, emotions, thoughts or efforts on her. She is a liar and will most likely deny everything anyhow.

Focus on fixing your marriage. Tell OWH what you know in one fell swoop, no warning, no gradual build-up. He might be the one factor that can stop OW from continuing to try getting to your H.

Wish I'd known this on D-Day #1.....probably wouldn't have had 3 more if I'd exposed immediately. Please learn from my mistakes. If my errors can help just one, maybe there is a redeeming reason for them afterall.

Ace