Hello, I need help!
I really don't know what to do, after speaking to parents and preist, I am confused. I am going through the most horrible time of my life. I don't want to eat and I feel bad. before I go on any further, I will say what is going on in marriage. First, my husband is somewhat immature at times. He sometimes doesn't take things serious or me. He doesn't worry about things as much as I do. Also, he is very careful with money at times, not all the times but at times because he doesn't have a good paying job as me. He can be tight. He is sometimes cold, like he doesn't take me serious for my birthday and on valentine's day, he didn't even say nothing, becuase his sister had an emotional problem. Another thing, since he had nothing to offer me when we got married, 8 months ago, my parents decided to let us use the next door apartment which is next door to their house, they are the owners, and they didn't want us to pay rent because they knew he couldn't afford it. We had been living in this apartment since we got married. My parents and family use the shower room and kitchen because their house is under construction, but they try to give us privacy. They never budded in or asked us for money. Their belief is that my husband would be treated like a son because of me. But, my hubby wouldn't take the trash because he claimed that others dirtied the place or kitchen. I would tell him that he had to be grateful for being in the place for free. I would ask him that if he didn't work, and their was no milk or groceries in the fridge, to get some , but he always responded that he never ate at the apartment while I was gone to work, so why bother. I would get upset because he wasn't acting like a family member. I would ignore when he spoke to me. I would call him names, put him down. To make a story longer, he just starting disliking my family. He didn't really like it if I spent time with them.If my parents went to the apartment to get something from the fridge or whatever, he would go to the bedroom and close the door. So we would fight constantly because I wanted him to love them as much as I do. But since he didn't, then when I would mingle with his family, I wouldn't really say much, I was quiet because it wasn't fair that I show manners and love towards them when he didn't do the same for my family. For any reason, I would threat him, and I would not give him sex when I thought he didn't deserve it. I would tell him that if he was tight about things, then no sex. But, just the other day, we had an argument because I took out 200 dollars to spend in a casino. and he was mad, and I told him he was tight and I told him I wanted a divorce. He got upset, and he started socking the steering wheel with his hand, while in the car. I didn't know what to do, so when we got home, I ran to my parents and I told them about our argument and they got upset. During the argument, he told me that I always give things to my parents like money and lending them the car. I told him that he was selfish. So when I told my parents about our argument, they were upset and hurt that after all they have helped him and treated him lilke a son, he was talking bad about them. So they advised me that he was no good for me and that he was a tight man who was going to always be crying about money. SO, i told him I wanted a divorce, because I was mad. WHen I told him, he didn't want to do it,but I told him that it was the best because of his tight attitude and our problems. When he was moving his things out of the apartment, my parents were there and he didn't even say thanks , he was quiet the whole time.He left without saying thanks or nothing. He just left me a note where we slept, the note said he loved me. We foughtt a lot. I guess because he is different than me. I was raised to not worry so much about money to the point of being cold and selfish. And his parents were the type to work and pay bills and make money. Well, I feel awful now, since he has been gone. I miss him. I feel empty without him. I did fight a lot, but now that he is gone, I regret everything. But he hasn't called or nothing. I wonder if I should proceed with the divorce? My parents and family tell me he is immature, ill mannered and selfish. But I love him even though at times he makes me mad, I love him. I felt comfortable around him. I am really scared for what might happen with me. I cry and feel bad. But at times I felt he didn't value me and took me and my family for granted. That is why I couldn't enjoy being with his family because he didn't care about mine. I guess what is confusing me is: should I stay with him even though he has been disrespectful to my parents.For I care for my parents and I will always help them, but I feel this bothers him. He hasn't called or looked for me. I am so scared he might want a divorce. I feel bad, I miss my partner. It' s only 8 months since we married.My parents tell me it is better if he don't get back with me because he is selfish and by his side I will suffer because he is disrepectful and selfish. He may not be a man like the other men who are really manly and he has a lot of defects, but I love him even though he is weird sometimes!
