Alright Coach. Who do we play next? The OP's

I do need some time to sharpen my survival knife and eat some 3 bean Tacos with hot sauce and cayenne pepper. Maybe I should fry those for good measure.

OWWW, BC...you were alter boy for WAAYYYYY TOOOOO LONGGG!

Chris, I think you need to send him back to detention with CJ...he needs some DISPLINCE! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Ya know...I think I may disagree...I think BC should become the team mascot!

MASCOT?

How am I gonna gut Infidels if I'm runnin around trying to start the wave, picking fights with the umpires, and dancing to Beat It at half time.

I'm Friggin Rambo man, I'm a WARRIOR, I have a Cajun Battle Cry.

AAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

I don't have time for Detention, I don't have time for Shenanagans, all I have time for is.......wait a minute

ooohhhh a Beer

excuse me for a moment

who says shenanagans anymore? That is so yesteryear <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

I think BC could be just as easily distracted with a steak at the end of a rope...

oh that sounds GOOOOOOD

Hey, folks. I presume this the new Killer Bee's thread. If it is, time_for_change is in the midst of reevaluating her strategy and determining when (and will soon address, "how") to go into Plan B. Would any of you be willing to go to her thread and offer support and advice on how you determined when the right moment was, and things like that? I'm sure she'd appreciate it.

Plan B: 111 Days.
Contacts: (4) 1 at Attorney’s Office, (2) House stuff move outs, 1 at Court.
Last Contact: 28 Days ago in court.
Divorce Status: 23 Days (June 13) until Magistrate can/will approve D

There is more light on the far side of Pluto than this Plan B. Is there a trophy for darkest Bee?

Unfortunately as the soul mates are not living together due to MIL’s rent free enabling, the lovebirds have yet to really discover how special they both are. I definitely have a toothless Plan B. No wonder it is so easy to keep it dark.

I assume Gollum is still her love stallion but in truth I have no idea. If not, just based on the fog talk and behavior at court and from what DD tells me, she would have to be on OM2. I could see that as a possibility.

MIL once told me that she had no intention of meeting, or letting BIL’s (now former) MOW into Infidel Hotel until her divorce was final. Way to make a tough lasting stand against infidelity! Waywards everywhere were quaking in fear. I assume she is holding Wayzilla to the same tough love standards. It cuts down on embarrassing moments such as, “Wayzillypoopsy, please don’t moan and shout Gollum’s name so loud. It wakes your father.” (:{0}<<<<<< Sigmund Freud Puking Emoticon

WW is either trying to semi-Plan B DD19 herself or has other things to do. They go almost a week now between short phone conversations. I don’t know how she can do it. It would drive me nuts to have that kind of relationship with DD. The damage on this one will take a while to repair.

Day 9,503 of 9,526. 99.75% Over. Bummer. I miss my wife, but I will do fine without Wayzilla.

Chris,

You'll be just fine, especially when me you and anchorwoman are drinking beer and eatin chicken wings. Send me an email. Let's make some plans. I'm ready to get the he11 outa dodge.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> I don't want to hear this from you, chrisner. As long as you are both breathing, there is hope.

If she is on to OM2....I think that is a good thing. She may start going through men trying to find the happiness she can only find within herself. She will come to that realization someday. At that time, I think she will also realize what she has done to you. She WILL eventually "see" again what your M was, and miss it.

There is no possible way she completely erased you from her memory. NO POSSIBLE WAY!

I think she is hiding from you. And from DD19, too. She cannot face you. She's trying so desperately to get away from what she has done, but she is only digging deeper. Especially if she is on OM2. She is searching for something....and she will only find it in herself.

Time, chrisner. Divorce or not, things will change. It won't always feel so stagnant. You are an incredible man and father, that does not go unnoticed.



This is going to sound kind of funny..but..she probably misses herself, too. And she can't find you again until she finds herself.

I'm impressed with your Plan B. I'm a Plan B flunky.... I have too big an urge to push back when he pushes me. I don't think I better break contact down like you did. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

We had a babysitter that used to tell me everyday when I dropped off DDs "make it a good day"...I always wanted to smack her (I'm not a morning person). She meant well, but darn it sometimes chit just happens, you don't always have control.

So I'll tell you, since I'm too far away for you to smack.."make it a good day!" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Thanks Cowgirl.

You will really like this. This Sunday DD19 out of nowhere says, "She did not run away from us, she is running from herself. But no one can win that race."

Not bad for a kid.

I still think it is Gollum. She was really hooked on the little puke. But based on her fog it has to be someone.

I can only say.....Wow! What an incredible young woman you are raising. As you can tell, I agree with her whole heartedly!

Hang in there, chrisner. You will get what you deserve. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> You already have, in part, with DD19. She is a reflection of you.

Waywards have a tendancy to isolate themselves from others who don't support their A. My WW used to talk to her sister everyday before the A, but she would avoid her and all of our mutual friends during the A. Only now is she talking regularly to her sister again, and her relationship with our mutual friends is still damaged because she is afraid to talk to them because "they probably hate me." She has also avoided my parents like the plague, even though she says that she likes them. She hasn't seen them in almost a year. In the wayward state of mind, anything that kills the fantasy of the affair must be avoided at all costs. Unfortunately, that means your WW is going to completely ignore your DD for quite some time unless she starts supporting her decisions (doubtful).

little puke...that is a good one...almost better than skanky ho! But one is a man and the other is a woman...I feel new abbreviations coming on:

OM = LP
OW = SH

yes, I like it!

Yep and to the OMW (a nice pretty woman who I met a couple times three years ago) my darling wife is the skanky Ho.

Question: Does it bother you a lot what your wayward spouse has done to the OP’s spouse and children? I am finding myself thinking more and more about the truly terrible thing WW has done to OMW’s 2-year old son particularly. Without thought or a shred of remorse she has changed this little boy’s entire future and relationship with men and his mother. She has inserted herself into their lives in the worst possible way and they will pay for that for a long time.

I know that in Gollum’s case if it had not been my wife there would have been another because he is a committed serial cheater, but it was my wife. Her only defense to this was lines like, “I never meant to hurt their marriage”, and “I don’t want to know anything about their marriage”. Profoundly and insanely stupid fog talk! Their personal recovery has to cross this bridge someday. How do you live with it?

I am so grateful I am the betrayed spouse. I don’t know if I could live through the shame of the other side.

Chris,

I think about that quite often. SH (skanky ho) is also a serial cheater. I feel for her husband and kids.

I remember when I first found out about the TM and calling and such I kept saying please don't break up someone elses family. His reply I'm not breaking up anyones family.

That's what is different about this A. The first one was a single mom with no BF at the time. This one hadn't even been married a little over 2 years before she started with my H.

Still

Chris, I'm right there with you on being the BS. Yes, the hurt and devastation are horrible, but I did not hurt anybody else, I didn't take anyone for granted (after the A was discovered). I have a clean slate. I'm a lucky dog...

I never had to think about what the A did to another family with children, but I did think about the first A partner's BH. I know his pain inside and out. She went back to him pretty quickly, but she just had to bump uglies with someone else BEFORE doing so. Yeuchk! I'd call her something much worse than I've ever read here, but I might get the boot for it. Hurting me is one thing; she doens't know me beyond "Hello", but she hurt her H, and my son; and that just pissed me off to all get out!

Chris, she's struggling with something, judging by her demeanor with your DD and how she 'looks' lately. You know those thoughts that bang around in your brain at night, post trigger or something similar. Imagine what's thumping around in WW's head; it can't be good, all that white noise. Especially when you couple that with taking the extra time beyond hearing the white noise to try and justify it's existence, without blaming oneself.

The SH knew he had 5 kids and didn't care...

What kind of a person can do that?

I agree, I could NEVER be that person. I would have divorced first, then done my own thing. (Not that I would have...I was happy...oh wait I forgot...it was miserable the whole 13 years...silly me!)

In my case SH had been D for 3 years, and was married 13 before that. BDS is officially at the 13 year mark today (Can we sing a rousing rendetion of Happy Anniversary?) so they are both very committed people...LOL!

If by committed, you are thinking LOONY BIN, then I AGREE! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />