My WW had an affair that started six months ago. She continued contact throughout Nov. In early Dec, I told her no contact and no lies or I would be moving out. To this day she swears there has been no contact. I recently found out that her friend has been a mediator for them, and when confronted, my WW swore she only knew about two calls to her friend from the other guy to see how she was doing. In March, she left for her night class at 5 p.m. and didn't return home until midnight. She never even called me. She said the class was cancelled and she went to a pub with her girlfriend, she didn't call cuz she thought I would tell her to come home. I recently received cell phone records that showed that she was 30-40 miles away from where her class is located during that time. Two weeks ago, she decided she wanted to try with me (she has been on the fence for six months). She totally denies that she didn't drive to her class and says we just need to focus on the future. I am having a hard time letting this lie go. My friend says to forget it and move on. I don't feel I can move on until I know the truth of what has been going on for the last several months when there wasn't to be any contact. I would like opinions on whether I should just forget it and move on, or push her to tell me the truth of the past...I think I deserve it, but I don't want to be foolish.

put a GPS on her car


do you have kids?
how long married?
first affair?

Sorry to hear about what you're going through. When you find out the truth, what are you prepared to do? If you have kids, I hope you think of ways to protect them from this.

Lots of luck.

This is eriely like my sitch. Not knowing for sure and being lied too hurts and sucks.
I tried to believe and believe in my spouse also.
My story may help you with yours:
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...e=0#Post3275828

My friend says to forget it and move on.

__________________

easy for him to say! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

don't deny what you are feeling.

your wife is NOT being open and honest w/ you and it is killing your marriage.
i would insist on MC...and tell the MC that you NEED to know what has been going on behind your back before you can consider doing what it takes to recover your marriage.

Your wife is fence sitting. She is trying to have her emotional needs met by you and the OM. The best way to remedy this situation is to knock her off the fence.

Once a liar, always a liar...

Your experience is so totally similar to mine. I agree with your friend -- it's time to move on.

If you want to install a GPS, make sure that your name is on the title to the vehicle. I used the "Live Wire" real-time GPS from BrickHouseSecurity. You can see your vehicle's location on a real time website. Their service uses the cellular phone network, so there is a monthly fee.

My wife's patterns became really clear once I knew where she was parking. Also, you can correllate those locations with the cell bill.

In the end, however, this will all simply confirm what you already know. If you need the confirmation (I did), spend the bucks. Based on what I have learned, I'm guessing that you already know what you'll discover...

Take your time (it took me nearly seven months after being married more than two decades).
Make up your own mind.
Respect yourself.

Peace,
LiesRedux