Well, the final straw has been set in place...it is OVER...

Found out today that OW is pregnant. I knew this was coming, but it hurts none the less.

I had said that if he had a child with her, I would never take him back, under any circumstances...mainly due to the financial implications that would mean for my family...not to mention the difficult situatin that would put me and my children in for the rest of our lives.

Even though I knew I was done before this...it still hurts and makes me sick to my stomach!

I just want to scream, puke...another little piece of my heart just died and now my love bank is completely depleted!

IHC

OMG..I am so sorry. I would do the same thing.

I too am reallllly sorry for you. I've always thought that would have been "it" for me too. OW did "claim" that she might be PG at one time, but was just yet another lie.

So sad.

Be sure to establish child support for your children. Check with the folks on the Pregnancy/Child board. It is important that your family get first dibs on CS. I don't know all the details, but you don't want to split available resources with her.

IHC, I'm so sorry to hear this. I can only imagine how painful this day is for you. You have a boundary, and all you have to do is follow it.

You have enough to deal with with your own children and your foster child, this is too much. Do that Plan B, stay dark, protect yourself against their crap. You need no part in this, NONE. Stop talking to your WH, completely. Deal only through lawyers and intermediary, which I will be happy to do for you, if you need it.

CS is all in the works...just waiting on wage assignment. The divorce is only 2 papers away from being final...so I am setting my appointment to file mine soon. He then has to file his and then maybe another court date...he wants one so he doesn't have to pay as much in CS...He won't get it lowered...no chance of that.

So even though this info does not change my plans...it SUCKS!

I don't know how it is where you are, but in Ohio, CSEA WILL NOT COUNT a child in the figures until they are actually born. Check with your state...

deltabravo.net is a great site for this info

{{{{{IHC}}}}}}

I don't know what else to say. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

Prayers for you and your family.

JinGA

IHC, I am so sorry! It means little now but one year from today you will be in such a better place.

{{{IHC}}}

It's the end of THIS road. You have a whole new wide open choice of new roads now.

sl,

I will not break my plan B. This is now a lifetime plan B. I feel like I will be fine...I just need a little time.

It's like seeing the last little ember go out!

A little time to heal...and I will be blissfully back in my new life.

UGH!!

BTW sl...I am still sooo happy for you!!!

Argh! I'm so sorry, IHC.

You will be fine. You were sounding like you didn't really want him back, anyway, so maybe this just cements things for you. You really can move on to better things, and I know that they are out there for you.

That doesn't make it suck any less right now, though. I wish there were more I could do.

(((IHC)))

EEEK!!! One of my worst nightmares! I'm so sorry, InHisCare. I can't imagine how you must feel. No matter how "done" we think we are with our M....we still feel.

(((((IHC)))))

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((IHC))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

My sister, I know exactly how you feel. I felt the same thing the day I found my exH's last cybersex A...because that was the day that I knew it really was over. OVER, over. The very last little piece of your heart dies, and even though some part of you knew it was coming, it is SOOOOOOOOoooooo sad!

May I just remind you of something? I know it feels like you will be without love in your life for a while, but I would like to remind you that God is your:
Love ! (I John 4: 16, 19)
Peace ! (Isaiah 26:3)
Forgiveness ! (II Cor. 5:17)
Righteousness ! (Titus 3:5)
Deliverer ! (I John 4:1-4)
Fellowship ! (Matt. 18:20)
Example ! (John 13:34)
Companion ! (Psalm 119:63)
Brother ! (Eph. 2:19)
Guardian ! (Isaiah 43:2)
Security ! (Rom. 8:38-39)
Sufficiency ! (II Cor. 9:8)
Fulfillment ! (Joel 2:26)
Everything ! (Phil. 4:13)

Your faithful friend,



CJ

It's true I did not want him back anyway...I'll be fine once the shock wears off...it is already starting to.

I am actually starting to feel better already...thank God.

I am not crying anymore. WHEW! The crying stopped much sooner than I thought.

It will probably hit again, but I am going to pretend it won't for the moment! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

This is just the stupidest thing someone could do...he doesn't know the 3% figure...so now he will never have a dime to himself.

IHC, this was one of my fears. I worried that WH would go out and begin ANOTHER family. What kind of sense does that make, he's already got one. You can never account for how needy other people will get, and to what lengths they will go to keep someone. The excuse could have always been, 'well, condoms break'. Yikes! Yeah, condoms break and they get tiny little pinholes in them too! Or, woopsie, I forgot to take my pills this MONTH!

Lifetime Plan B is good for you, you will be able to move on and be very sure about what kind of person you want in your life. You can go for what you need, without worrying that you didn't take the time to heal from this. I am still so very sorry that you have this blow dealt to you. This sux.

Thanks for being happy for me, in such a time when you are not so thrilled. Things are going well; we're taking things slowly right now. I do feel strange sometimes, about being back with my husband; not that I don't want it, but it's like we are back to where we were before the A, with more knowledge of how to get past this place. It's not a rut, per se, but a place where we are trying to get back to each other, instead of drifting apart. It's good. I am with you though, I would have filed as soon as I heard about another child. That's just a slap in the face that none of us deserve.

CJ,

You made me cry again!!!!

But it was a good one...because I believe every single one of these statements!


This is my future and hope...not in a man!



I did know...now I am just being directed further down that road. Every time I have wondered whether I was on the right path, new "stuff" just gently pushes me down this path!

Thank you for your kind and encouraging words!

(((((IHC)))))

Oh, wow.
That is way too shocking.
I can't imagine what the kids are going to think.

Man, when your WH digs himself a hole, he digs it all the way. He has no idea what he's in for.

I like what Chrisner said: "It's the end of THIS road. You have a whole new wide open choice of new roads now."

Thinking of you and your kiddos.

-AmI.

(((IHC)))

Just went to go grab some lunch and as I was walking back out to my car, I started grinning...my friend that was in the car asked what was that smile for?

I smiled because I realized that I still have a GREAT life ahead of me. Yes, there will be fallout from this, but my life is STILL headed in the right direction!

I still have the same concerns for my children and the ever present...who would marry a woman with 5 kids question...but...I am content with who I am for the first time in my life. THAT feels good.

Now I just hope I can keep focused on all this positive thinking I have going...

Two steps forward...one step back!

(((((InHisCare)))))

May God make His peace and comfort known to you and give you rest.

God bless.