Found out last week my W had cheated on me, and has been for some time, all with different people. When I first found out, I left. I cried, bawled, was deeply hurt, and still am. We met up a couple of days later and talked, things went pretty good. I had been staying with a friend, and over the weekend, I went to look for a place to move to for the time being. To my surprise, she went wih me. We talked more, and even became some what affectionate, kissing and touching, something we haven't done in quite some time. Ended up finding a place, but couldn't get into it until Mon, so I ended up in a motel for the night. She ended up coming there with me, where we became intimate, intimate in a way that we hadn't felt in A LONG time. It lasted for hours, not the 10-15 min it may have lasted before. She went home, and we talked more, I ended up going back home that evening, I feel I need to to help me deal with everything, where we became intimate again, this time for about 45min. It was great to say the least. Last night, same thing. We are talking about what happened, our fears, our concerns. She is going into counseling, as well as myself. What both of us don't know is if what we are doing is right or wrong, and the reasons both of us are feeling like we are when we are intimate. I feel like I can't get enough of her, something I haven't felt in quite some time, and neither has she. I think she is TRULY sorry for her past behavior, she does not understand the reasoning for her doing what she did. Wehave done the EN quiz, and I was able to answer hers for her for the most part, so I know where I went wrong. Should we be carrying on like we are, or are we just in a "fantasy" world right now. I was PETRIFIED to even touch her at first on Sun, but the more I touched her, the better I felt. The more I can talk to her, the better I feel, and I think she feels the same. I just don't know if the way we are carrying on is right or wrong. Anyone have any insight? Thanks

Off the top of my head, there is a worry about STDs.

If she doesn't understand herself, then it is likely that she will continue to do what she does. That is obviously not a good thing.

I think it is likely that the full measure will hit you in a few days or weeks.

Larry

I agree with Larry. My WH is truly sorry too and as much as we have gotten closer than we have ever been, the trust is still gone for now. It will be a very long time before it's built back up. I would be very cautious and not be too optimistic for now with the way things are going. I am not suggesting she doesn't mean what she says, just that you are both on a high right now after figuring out what you both really need and that high will end up being an emotional roller coaster as it did for us. Don't mask the real problem. I am happy that you are both going into counseling. Hopefully it will be a good counselor who will lead you both in the right direction. I am happy that you are both on the same page. That surely helps alot. I pray you continue down the same path and truly become happy again.

WH 33
BS 30 (me)
DS 7
DS 2

Married 7/19/1997
D-Day (EA) 1/07