Post deleted by iiiwideopen

The more proof you have the better. Waywards lie like pros, and do it in a bold faced manner.

Purchase and read "Surviving an Affair". Critically important, as all the advice you receive here will be based on Dr. Willard Harley's principals.

In the mean time, read all you can on the website about exposure. It is done as an "act of love", not vengence, to gain support from your WH's inner circle of friends and family in your efforts to save your marriage.

Sorry you have a need to be here, but it's as good a remedy for marriages impacted by infidelity as exists.

Don't discount the idea of hiring a PI to get irrefutable evidence of the affair before any confrontation with your H, because he'll have every excuse in the book, and will deny, deny, deny until he cannot do so any longer, because of the evidence.

Post here and learn all you can. Read as many threads as others, and plug in responses to others to your own sitch. Affairs and how waywards act are remarkably similar, and common.

Do not expose or confront until you have sufficient evidence, or you'll give up your source of info, and that will make the affair harder to bust when it goes deeper underground. In the mean time, snoop. Look through credit card records, receipts, locations of purchases, meals, gifts you didn't receive, or lingerie. They all slip up and leave evidence, you just have to be clever enough to catch them.

Lastly, the boards slow way down over holidays and/or weekends, and this is both, so don't panic if you don't get a bunch of responses. The site it typically busier during the work week <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Best wishes,
SD

In my signature area below, there's a link to a thread on Exposure, friend. I think that thread can give you some ideas you can adapt and expand on.

Hang in there, okay?

Thank for the reply. But let me clarify some things. I already been here. I read all the books. Followed all the steps (at least the ones I could follow alone). Thought they worked but they didn't. Now there is nothing left to be done to save my M. I married a serial cheater and I'm getting out as soon as possible. But first I want to let the other people involved know what they are upto. My W does not live with me anymore, I have no access to phone records, credit cards, emails etc. The only evidence of her current A (which I will not disclose yet) happened by chance because she made a huge mistake (sometimes I think she wanted to get chaught again). So my biggest issue is that with this current source I have enough to convince me but I don't think it will be enough to convice the OMW. So for the moment I will have to play it cool (I'm seeing her today) and hope she slips again :s

If you have no further interest in working on the marriage, friend, just supply the OMW with what you have and let it be done with. You aren't in the business of "convincing" OMW. You're only giving her a wakeup call to let her know her marriage is in jeopardy.

As for other folks, I'd keep to the high road here. Don't stoop to spitefulness. Revenge isn't nearly so enjoyable in retrospect.

You really don't need to "prove" that there is an affair. Sometimes just a "heads up" will do the trick. I KNEW there was something wrong in our marriage, too many strange things were happening. But I didn't suspect an affair. If someone had warned me, I would have put two and two together.

Thanks guys. Maybe I'll just do that. But I will have to wait till monday when I will hopefully find OMW while he is at work.