Having a hard time figuring out how to reply to a post--thanks for everyone's ideas. They make good sense.

I have thought about your advice. I agree that I am basing so much around what my H is doing, who he is seeing etc. that it does feel like a huge weight on me. I am not doing the things for myself that I should be doing.

I do feel depressed that even though I am doing everything I can, he is still thinking of someone else. It makes me so sad.

However, I am at the point that I can doing nothing more. I feel like I will explode if I sit idly by and watch him fall into an EA. I know that I can't change him but I am very nervous about what I am seeing. It's like watching a horror movie in slow motion. Terrible.

Is it a DJ to tell him about the risks of a friendship turning into an EA? How do i do this so that I don't sound like his mother?

Again, I am trying to control things that are out of my hands really. I guess that my love and the time I spend with him are not enough--he still needs more from someone else.

Of course she is cheery and fun, full of energy for their shared pastimes and I am tired of working 40 hour weeks, taking care of our home, raising our 3 kids. (3 teenagers!!)

I sound like a basket case. I really need to get my mind around taking care of me. I need to get right on that.

Thanks for listening everyone. I'll let you know the little steps that I am taking.

Please continue to give me ideas. I can't tell you how comforting it was to read your suggestions. It was like fresh air just blew through my house.

Thanks, Sandy