So here is my story, Been married for 4 years will be 5 this Oct. For the past 2 months my wife has been texting and talked like crazy to her X fiance who also happens to be my step sons Dad. She also had two girls nights out where she met up with him at the end of the night before she came home. I confronted her about this on May 11th and she apologized about the increased talking and texting. She said that he is going through a hard time that his Dad is dying and he is going through a divorce and he does not have any friends.

However she flat out lied and did not admit to meeting up with him on the two occasions when she went out with her friend. Since I confronted her she really has stopped all the texting the only calls that happen are calls that are made about my step son. I'm really at a cross roads as to where I should go with this. I have the proof and know that she did in fact meet up with him on two occasions. I love/loved my wife with all my heart but feel really in different to her now. We have a beautiful 2 year old girl that means the world to me and I just to not know what to do.

I do not know what may have happened on the two nights in question but if a physical affair did take place she can not break contact with this man who is my step sons father. I will have to live with this for the rest of my life.

Since the 11th my wife is acting like everything is normal and peachy. I'm to on the outside but inside I'm just a mess. Should I just let it go for the best of my family or should I pursue the truth and damn the conscience that the truth may bring?

No you should address her behavior right now. But you need to get a plan before you approach the WS.

Step back and look at your M. What was is based on at the beginning vs now?

What are your ENs and hers?

Have you read SAA and HNHN? Please read those books and call Jennifer C @ MB for some phone counseling. You definitely need a POA (plan of action).

L.

Orchid has given you good advice. And yes, all contact between them can stop if necessary. Your worst fears are most likely true since she would have no reason to lie otherwise. Make sure that you do not accept her lies as truth when you KNOW she met up with him. Do not let this rest otherwise you will be dealing with a much bigger problem down the road.

CN:

Your WW has a son with the man that is "going threw a tough time"?

Since this child is his son, many of the plans around here will be difficult to fully implement because of this fact.

Can your WW learn to set some boundaries? Yes.

Should she be honest with you? Yes.

Has this A been driven further underground? Yes.

But you will always have the relationship between mother and father of the boy. Tricky. That's where the Harleys and thier MC can help. They have been There, Done that.

You say this OM is her X fiance. When did you meet WW?

How about a little more history?

LG

CN... Look at Lilsis thread... it will show a co parents do NOT need to interact. You can be the intermediary between the two of them if need be. Short of an emergency, if they have had an affair, there is no reason they will have to communicate. Anything that needs to be said or done can be handled by or through you...
Is all this cumbersome...yep... but it is one of the unintended outcomes of infidelity.

We met about 6 years ago. The affair has ended that is about the only thing I'm certain of at this point. We are leaving on a cruise tomorrow and we had a date night on Friday. We went through the whole argument thing but she refused to take responsibility for meeting him at the end of those two nights. Claims it never happened. That all the increased talking over the last few months was about his dad and his divorce. I failed to mention to her though that I had proof that I knew that she did in fact meet up with him.

So now after a month she ended it on May 11th how do I go about opening this can of worms back up to make this right? To get everything out in the open once and for all? So I can start believing in my life again.