In this verse, the apostle Peter emphasizes the need for a husband to understand his wife because she is a "weaker vessel." Your wife wants a man who understands her and her needs.

Your wife needs to feel safe, secure and protected. As her husband, it's up to you to provide that security. I was reminded of this years ago when I attended a conference for couples. During the conference, a young woman was raped in her hotel room.

As the speaker told the other conferees about the incident, I noticed an interesting phenomenon. Instinctively, as though led by an orchestra conductor, nearly every husband in the audience tenderly slid his arm around his wife. Likewise, almost every wife slipped closer into his protective embrace. It was a physical gesture of a woman's need for safekeeping and a man's natural desire to protect his wife.

People use locks, burglar and fire alarms, and lighting systems to protect their most valuable possessions. When you invest in protecting your wife, you are making a statement about her value to you.

Certainly you already protect your wife physically. You wouldn't think of having it any other way. You discourage her going out at night if it is dangerous. You protect her by encouraging her to lock the car when she goes shopping. And you provide the kind of security she needs at home for the times you are away.

But are you protecting her from other muggers in her life, such as:

Over scheduling her time?

Her own unrealistic goals or expectations, which set her up for failure?

Burnout at work? At home?

The children, who would take advantage of her weaknesses that they know so well?

Obviously, you can't protect your wife from every pressure, worry, fear or loss. But you can do your best to anticipate many of these problems before they occur and to establish a solid security system for her protection.



Discuss: Talk with your wife about how you can protect her in different areas of her life, especially those listed above.

Pray: That God would give you wisdom and courage as you seek to protect your wife from negative outside forces.[/quote]

Excerpted from "Moments Together for Couples" by Dennis and Barbara Rainey. Copyright 1995 by Dennis and Barbara Rainey. All
rights reserved. To purchase the book, visit


Famlylife

Now wait a minute, AJ, I have a PISTOL and my H DOES NOT. I am hardly "weaker" than him!

Mel<------locked and loaded, baby!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

AJ,
That was great

I think, however, this is one of those communication issues maybe because of the translation - I don't think he is saying that women are weaker, but that like a fine piece of china, we are fragile <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> and we are to be protected as such.

To me, there is a huge difference in weak and in fragile

just my 2 cents

Of course another really big mugger to protect one's spouse from is the OP: either protecting them from ever having to deal with an A, or if it's too late for that, protecting them from ever having to deal with another OP. I am grateful for every day I am well protected from that, for almost 2 years now.

This really makes me think of what both spouses can do their best to protect each other from.

I think a H should not only attempt to help his W be protected from over-scheduling her time, but also over-scheduling his time. You can even get in your recommended 15 hrs/week together and have your time overbooked.

Obviously the family needs to eat, and a house is nice, too, but I would rather drive old cars, wear second-hand clothes, and have more time to spend with my family. In point of fact, I do drive an old car, I do wear mostly used clothes, but I get to spend lots of time with my family, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I often need to be protected from my unrealistic goals and expectations, though with nurturing I am getting better at that. It makes me wonder how much trouble men have with this, or if it is mostly just a woman thing.

Probably the men need to be protected from the little bogey of self-doubt, but if we wives are doing our job meeting the admiration need, it should help keep that at bay. When they know how much we respect and admire them, it will give them the strength to slay dragons for us. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> (And you thought rats on the doorstep were bad.)

Kids are sure a biggie. Our kids have always gotten in trouble for trying to go behind one parent's back to get a different answer from the other, and they still keep trying it. I can hardly imagine how hard it would be if one of us were a softie, always giving in and undermining the other one. We have to back each other up, or those little hooligans would divide and conquer!

I think it was Arkie who posted about being the woman in the sportscar, of being excited about our H's dreams and aspirations, even the impractical ones...that it's not about necessarily having the car, but having the attitude of being willing to be the wild woman cruising down the road with the top down, hair blowing in the wind.

It is so much fun when both spouses can dream impractically with each other. Most people are not so selfish and absorbed as to bankrupt their families to get all the toys they want. Most people are willing to be practical, but it doesn't stop them from wishing.

Scene 1:
Husband: Look at that gorgeous boat! Wouldn't it be fun to have a boat like that? We could go spend time out on the lake, and go swimming together.
Wife: Are you craxy? We can barely make our house payment! How can you even say something like that? Men, bah! I'll never understand them!
Outcome: They do not get the boat, the H feels dissatisfied, and wonders why his W doesn't want to spend time with him, and the W is massively irritated at what she sees as her H's selfishness.

Scene 2:
Husband: Look at that gorgeous boat! Wouldn't it be fun to have a boat like that? We could go spend time out on the lake, and go swimming together.
Wife: It's beautiful, and I really like the color! Yep, that would be fun all right. Hey, how would you like to take the kids on a picnic and go swimming this weekend?
Outcome: They don't get the boat, not for another 37 years, anyway, but the H is happy and feels understood, and the W is glad her H cares enough to think of spending time together as a family, whenever he sees something that looks like fun.

My mom always told me, "The wife sets the tone for the family, but the husband sets the tone for the wife." She was exactly right, though after almost 11 years I can see that the wife also has a lot of responsibility to set the tone for the husband, too.

Every day, we each need to look for ways to protect and encourage each other.

Ha ha ha, I have been hogging the computer, so AJ doesn't even know yet that he shoulda ducked, since he's got an armed Texan lady on the wrong side of the sights. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

MoFo, I liked the way you put that. Certainly in many ways women are not the weaker sex. My mom emailed me something a while ago, wish I knew where it was, that told what the world would be like if men and women traded places. One of the results would be that the human race would die out within one generation after men discovered the pain of childbirth, lol.

Even when there is something I am fully capable of taking care of by myself, on my own two feet, no problem at all, I still relish the protectiveness and concern that AJ shows. But then, I am fine china. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

AJ had a good laugh, too. He said he knew somebody might get riled up, but he had good intentions.

This whole idea of the "weaker vessel" and "submission" are so often misinterpreted, but very worthy of study.

Mel, I'm gonna tattle on that boy. He asked, so she has a pistol, but does she know how to use it? I told him don't be silly, she's from Texas - she can shoot anything. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

(He used to be a tactical firearms instructor.)

You are right. Of course, I can use it, I AM A TEXAN!! DUH!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Mel<----- who has the target practice thingies with some BULLEYES hanging on the garage wall to prove it! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

*snort* (I'm still trying to snort like a Texan.)

Every once in a great while, AJ takes me out in the backyard to fire off a few rounds with the shotgun. He is really good, I am not too bad, and needless to say we would fit in much better in Texas. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Neak <------ who has just realized that even this thread is now about Texas than the Left Coast.