A friend of mine is married and has two small children. Her husband started an affair and left his family to move in with OW. He behaved exactly according to the WS script, claimed that he had found someone who understood him so well and took their children along with OW to "family" activities. But now (after 9 months) he has broken up with OW and apparently he has been really nasty with her for a while.

I also heard a story about a woman who started dating a man she thought was single. After a month she found out that he was married but he told her he was going to divorce his wife. The OW fell pregnant and the WH promised her that he was going to take care of them and even went with her to the hospital when she delivered the baby. But then things began to change, he started acting cold and finally outright mean to her and eventually he broke up with her.

My guess is that this is something which happens when the tension of the affair is building up and the WS starts to feel that the reward is less than the price. Any other experiences or opinions?

Why...

Reality replaces fantasy, pure and simple. The relationships that WS have with OP don't involve the day to day responsibilities of simply existing. The illicit partners can focus on each other more intensly. They can usually do this because their own spouses are running things while they are out betraying them.

My WH really ate up all the focused attention he got from OW but got reality right quickly when she started demanding more and more of his time and began to bother him with her ongoing financial trouble saga. Once she started expecting him to fix her broken life, he got pretty scared and starting retreating.

Who

Yes. It is very common.

After a true final breakup some WS's can not stand the site of their OP.

For some WS's the OP is a constant source of temptation.

It all depends on how the WS's handle it.

That is one of the reasons that the Harley's recommend NC EVER FOR LIFE with the OP. It is VITAL for NC to be maintained for a marriage to have a chance at recovery.

I guess that is good news for my friend’s marriage. Her husband has not shown any interest in recovering their marriage while he has been involved with his OW, he even filed for divorce even though he has not taken all necessary steps yet. But if he really doesn’t want anything to do with OW the affair is definitely dead.

My friend simply cut all contact with her WH when she found out about OW and she says that he has to show her that he is ready to commit big times if he wants to have a chance to come back home. For their children I hope they will recover their marriage.