I think sometimes people need something more to take action. Whether it be a graphic picture, a 2X4, etc. In the end, we are all here to help one another, and each poster reacts to different styles...

Jerry had I had known that Mimi H and your W were affair partners, perhpas that would change the words I would choose to use. I apologized once, I will do so again for having not known these facts.

Also, to BobP and others that took offense... I do not know what in the world you expect me to say when describing something. Bob, I think you are being hypocritical here in that I have never seen you once complain about the rutting like pigs comments which the vast majority of people would find more offensive than the clinical terminology that I used. Please consider that for a moment....I think you were offended because I chose to take on the other board regarding an issue. In fact you said so. But what I do not understand is how you can be offended at the words I used, but offer no offense to terminology that is more graphic and offensive. I think the issue here has more to do with my other sentiments that while you may not have agreed with them, I consider to be whole heartedly true.
I care very much how people feel Bob...very much.... that does not mean I will be muffled because someone got their feathers ruffled. It's not going to happen.
I do not offer apologies unless I mean them... I apologized to Jerry very early in this thread... just because you and Jerry have decided that it is not heart felt enough does not mean it wasn't genuine.
I like you Bob, always have. I never intend to offend you and am sorry whenever that might happen. If it happens to occur because of a truth that I feel needs to come out or be spoken, then at times that will happen.... just as you have hurt others with some of your truths in the past...Kiwi comes to mind.
So again, I mean no disrespect to anyone by using what I consider to be the LEAST offensive terms possible. If you or anyone else cannot accept that, I don't know what else to say. Obviously, not every BS saw things as you two did...it was not an affront to "every BS." Only those that took offense to the words... and to them, I am sorry.

exactly my point, where is the "help" in this grphic post?
I stand by my words/ I don't know if MEDC will, but with serious reflection, I think he will see his error; but he may never admit it!

J

I'm very confused. Is Jerry (Screen Name: ShineThrough) the ex-OW's BH in Mimi's situation?

A few on this thread seem to think so.

Jo

This quote is from a poster that many felt I was being too harsh with...she personally thanked me.

I want to thank everyone here who chimed in on my thread from time to time... and especially those who delivered some serious 2x4s. I absolutely would be still diligently destroying myself had it not been for you all. And I am forever grateful.

Wait just a cotton-pickin minute..Mimi with her arms crossed in a huff.. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

I don't know where in the world this came from but IT IS NOT THE TRUTH...

The OW in my case was NOT MARRIED..that PYT was as SINGLE as can be during my H's affair with her...

I don't know who in the world Jerry is..

I just heard of him today...

Now, this is how GOSSIP gets started...

I'm PLAYING but I guess I should be really upset but I'm not...cause this is so FARFETCHED...

Yeap, that's why I asked.

Go look at Bob's thread and a couple other folks on this thread.

I'm sure its a misunderstanding where Jerry simply hasn't answered them, or I missed the post where Jerry did.

Jo

Here's a couple of them

I got exactly that same impression in the very first post when it says "Especially when that OW was my wife of 32 years". I'm not sure if it was implied or I just inferred it but BP read it exactly the same way I did.

And for the record, that comment of MEDC's definitely pierced right through me when I first read it on that other thread. I don't have MEDC on ignore but I generally skip over his posts in threads.

I don't even know if the HO is 32 yet..just kidding..she's probably 35 by now... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

Holy Cow,
How could anyone come up with a convuluted theory like tHAT?

For the record, I am the BS of my lifelong wife, Gail, who betrayed me after 32 years of M. She did it with her boss, who was quite an adept predator and took advantage of every weakness she displayed to him.

It's exactly why I wanted my W to read this now locked downed thread. To help explain the "Why" of what she did and how it came to pass so easily. But the thread has been tainted by hurtfull and hatred words. Thus my disappointment,
Jerry

I'm sure it's just the way the first post was worded.

Here's how Jerry.

Following your initial post (excerpt above), several folks responding to you asked you if you were the OW's BH in Mimi's sitch, but you never responded to their question.

Like Pio said. Its probably the way in which your first post was worded.

Thanks for clarifying for everyone.

Jo

Perhaps we need to realize that our terminology could be hurtful and tone it down. I used to use the "rutting like pigs" phrase - got it from Mel I think, until one of the FWW's let me know how hurtful it was to her. So I stopped using it.

I know exactly why the phrase hurt me so much and far much more than "rutting like pigs" ever could.

Rutting is an animal act. Pigs genarrly wallow around in their own shyte and there is something totally inhuman about that phrase.

OTOH, what MEDC said was purely clinical. It was cold and calculating. It takes away all emotion.

I can forgive WW for getting caught up in blind emotion. I can forgive her falling to human weakness.

What I could not forgive is a cold, cruel act simply designed for physical pleasure without a thought as to how much harm that would do me or the family. It implies (or I infer) premeditation. That hurts.

MEDC:

I missed being HURT that particular time by you...

I've built up my resistance, I guess...or maybe I didn't read your post carefully..or maybe I didn't expect anything different from you. I don't know.

But I recall having a discussion with you in the past about this..how you have SEEMED mean-spirited and how I don't like meanness...

Wow,

I apologise sincerely, somehow, I never saw that and I'm sure MiMI didn't either,

I think I explained in previous post my sitch. If you're really interested, it's in the achived posts of this forum. That's probably exactlyly where it needs to be!

I've been here too long.

Sorry MEDC, carry on. It's long overdue that I just fade away from this forum, I have nothing further to add.

Blessings to all of you,
Jerry

Mimi....the problem with you and I will always be an issue that remains.. I look at you in a way similar to what Lem described....so, my personality will always rub some people like you the wrong way. I actually have frequently considerd your posts mean spirited and thoughtless...but then I realize it isn't your intent. Others have called you on that too...but I don't think your motives are ever bad so I read your words again. I actaully think yours and BR's thread today was very pissy and a back door way to slam a few people. I chose to stay off and out of it.

As for the rest of you...I have said my peace... if it wasn't enough for you, I have no more to offer to this discussion.

Take good care, Jerry.

I was offering to dialogue with you..but you came back with this..which I find to be argumentative and provocative and I wasn't trying to go there...

"PEOPLE LIKE YOU"..Oooh that sounds awful...but you're welcome to your opinion about this AWESOME CHILD OF GOD...



Sorry you felt that way. BR and I were expressing our thoughts and feelings..that's it...

Why would I have an agenda to slam anybody, MEDC?

I have no need to slam anybody.

Why would you make that assumption about us?

We are here because we have been victimized and traumatized by infidelity. We want to heal and to help others to heal..not TO HURT or TO SLAM anyone.