I have mixed feeling today about the wedding. Part me is saying good ridence, two cheaters making a life together. She has controlled their realtionship from the beginning making sure we would not get back together. playing all sort of games.

He is not the same guy I married. We would have been married 17 years next week. He had totally changed and he lets another person control his life. That's not a man, its a wimp. They have their own website where you could have watch the wedding live. Believe me I didn't watch the wedding, I wouldn't have put myself through such pain. I did visit their website out of curosity, she must have spend a least 25,000 on the wedding, I don't know how she got the money but living in Vegas now, I would not be suprise she did something seedy. Their wedding song had this line "Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars Pointing me on my way into your loving arms. This much I know is true That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you" Please their broken heart.


The only thing that bother me other than the song, was the guestbook, friends who support me and were disgusted what he had done to me, sending their best wishes. That hurts. Did they forget that these two were cheaters and all the hurt they had done to me.

My in-laws went but they didn't want to. I understand they want a relationship with their son and I fine with that, but I know they are displeased with their relationship. The have reassured me that I will always be part of their family. Believe or not when we get together for family gatherings we don't even bring up my Ex and we have a wonderful time. I get to see his brother's 3 year old daughter grow up and she just adores me and there is another one on the way due on my B-day. My Ex only have seen here 3 times.

I might have lost an ex but I have a wonderful family because of him. I'm totally free now. I go out with girlfriends who everytime we go try to fix me up with someone. In fact there is 24 year old who is interested in me ( I say he is too young) but he offered to cut my grass if I go out with him. It's nice to feel desired. Only the best is to come for me, for them they are stuck with each other.

HD2

Do not expect anything from "friends" and you will never be disappointed.

I pray a blessing for a season of light and hope for you from this day on.
{{{{HD2}}}}

{{{{HD2}}}}

That's got to be difficult, no matter how far down the path of healing you are.

I'm glad your inlaws are supportive of you, that's important, particularly if you have children (don't know if you do or not).

Living well is the best revenge... and like you said - they're stuck with each other.

24 eh? Yeah that's a bit young, IMO - but dang lady - that's flattering <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

JinGA

HD2,

Sorry to hear about the wedding. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> Certainly don't wish them well. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Here's an {{{MB Hug}}} from me 2 u!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Aloha,
L.

Hi <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

My condolences (sp?) on the loss of the person you once knew.

It probably doesn't diminish your sadness but the OW didn't marry the person you once knew and will never experience the marital relationship that you and he enjoyed.

I'm sorry for your loss, but I certainly wouldn't want to be in either one of their shoes either, kwim?

Luv the story about the 24-yr-old! LOL I had a similar experience except *my* 24-yr-old (actually he was 23!) was on the landscape crew where I live. Even though I think that it was probably part of a bet or something, it was the first summer that I was separated and it was fun to be flirted with by someone who was younger than one of my kids! LOL

Thank you everyone for your well wishes.

I never thought 17 years ago, I will posting about my WxH wedding. I wanted to go out with friends tonight, but everyone is attending weddings, this seems to be a popular date.

My girlfriends keep telling how beautiful I am not only on the outside but more importantly on the inside too. They can't understand how my WxH left me for her. It is his lost. I flirt with men now but I'm not ready to go and date. I even got the attention of a 24 year old, who is willing to do anything to go out with me. I actually enjoy being on my own, even though sometimes it gets lonely, I do miss the companionship with the WxH. Even my MIL is tring to fix me up..she told me I deserve someone better than her son.

As I mention several times, I couldn't have made it without my in-laws support or the support I receive here on MB. Through out this I didn't let anyone see the bitterness and anger, only here on the message board. I held my head up high, didn't do anything wrong and decided if I shown bitterness or anger, I would have been only hurting myself, not them. The OW couldn't stand that I didn't go crazy, she was depending on that, so it would make her look better in everyone eyes. I wasn't going let her have that satisfaction.

I earn the respect of my in-laws. They tell me everyday how much they love me and are proud of me on way I have handle this whole situation.They are even throwing me a party when they come back to celebrate me. They are the only family I have and love me because who I am, and not only because I married their son.

I am so sorry for the pain you have today. No matter where you are on your own path, it still hurts for the loss of the man you married and loved for years.

Does anyone else see the irony in the Vegas wedding? As in 'Sin City'?

I am not yet sure where my journey will end, but I, too, have had the goal that no matter what happens, I will have conducted myself in such a way that I can hold my head high.

You should take a GREAT deal of pride in yourself for that!

Not to mention that 24 year old! WhooHoo! You Go Girl! If it does nothing more than give you a boost, you deserve it!

Blessings to you as you move to a wonderful future!

I thought I did pretty good this weekend, didn't cry or feel blue, maybe a little sad but went on with my life.

Today, I just want to cry for no reason. I haven't cried for months. I don't know if its because I realize that my WxH is now married to the woman who destroyed our marriage or I just having one of the days. Maybe I just want closure.

I wouldn't want him back now, I realize I am better off without him. There are times I wish I could have save my marriage but the OW made sure that would never happen by moving him thousands of miles away. I wonder if we could have made it if he stayed in the area, All I wanted is closure now, and I didn't have a chance to even say goodbye to him. He never called me to tell me he was getting married. He came back east with the OW during Christmas, but they said they will only come back if I wasn't around. What were they afraid of, or she was afraid of? If their union was meant to be and their union was strong, it should have not matter if I was in the area or not.

It's over!! It's a new beginning for me. They are stuck looking into each other cheating eyes. I go out now but not ready for a relationship, I don't how to truat again, and I believe trust is an important part of any relationship. I guess its going to take time but at least I'm out having fun..

Just know in your heart that THEY can NEVER trust each other.

NEVER.

She will always worry about you being out there. And she should.

By the way, let the guy cut your grass. And for the date? Have lunch - it's safe.


SB

ask yourself.....if you were in her shoes...knowing how she got this guy. Would you trust him?

dont know about any of you but when i got married and did the "deed"..it WAS FUUUNNNN but after 6 weeks i asked myself....is this alll there is to sex?

then it hit me (not the pan...the thought).....you are making love to your BEST FRIEND...thru thick and thin.

That how the loving became intense.....my friend...my equal...my trust.

so you see....OM doesnt have that....."my equal...my trust(my [censored])"

worrying how long it last...(and trust me it cross their minds)...is no way to live a lifetime.

You be awsome......God is in control.

all you probably had in your prev. M was bread......now let God fix you a Sandwich!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

HD,

I wanted to let you know I thought of you on Saturday, and I didn't know you'd made this thread. I remembered.

You're remembered, 'k?

And I have a replacement story you can hold for the 7/7/07 thing...heard it on our local news...

They interviewed a new mother, Saturday...had her son shortly after midnight...and get this...that's not the only 7 tie-in...that boy is the seventh grandchild on both her and his sides of the family...they have been married seven years (and there were three more 7's I now forget)...

And to top it off...they have a baby girl together...who was born 3-03-03.

LOL!

Delight yourself...because you are delightful. I laughed so hard when you mentioned the 24-year-old and offering to cut your grass (I'm older than you are!). Please don't even do lunch...you are more mature, balanced and AMAZING. Hold out for your own caliber, experience...knowledge and wisdom, 'k?

Your xH doesn't have that...he remains fogged in a foggy marriage...not right in the ol' head. You ARE. I'm so glad you didn't go further on that website. Thank you (from me) for protecting your heart, cherishing reality (like your in-laws) and knowing they BOTH made choices...OW no more than xH...from really messed up thinking.

I know. I remember. Thank GOD I'm not xH or OW. Thank you for reminding me I didn't get that far, last that long, tear up such goodness in that way, at least. Didn't continue it.

If I could've signed their guestbook:

"What a day of full-blown sorrow. My condolences on your fantasy nuptuals...to have walked that broken road, because you're both broken people right now, and that road is littered with so much destruction from both your hands and hers its set your marriage on a foundation of harm and fantasy. I hope you learn to grieve well your loss of trust, radical honesty and reality. No amount of lucky 7's in the world can bring you real love. From a true friend...LA"

Then again, I wouldn't have gone. Maybe just to sign the guestbook and lick the cake?

You're going to rebuild your trust in yourself, HD. You've grown so much...you're worth trusting, knowing, loving and celebrating. Listen to your in-laws...they know their stuff.

LOL!

Grow more...let go and grieve, feel pity and sorrow for the very hard life xH signed up for, for who he once was...don't miss any of those stages...because there's not one thing broken in you, 'k?

LA

Amazing how some folks can take a "good song lyric" and twist it into a "self-justification" for SIN, and then try to invoke God's blessing on that broken Commandment.

I wonder how they "handled" the part of the vows about "Forsaking ALL others and keeping myself only unto you, until death do us part?" They already KNOW that part has no meaning to either of them, so while they held hands, were their other hands behind their backs with the fingers crossed?

It's good to read that you have some supportive friends, even the ex-in laws.

As for the friends who "signed the book," they sound more like acquaintences and not "true friends." Keep them at arms length or avoid them, they don't have the intestinal fortitude to take a STAND what is right.

God bless.