Reading your kind words about me meant a lot this morning.

That was truly a BLESSING!

I've been LISTENING to the book ATTRACTOR FACTOR and the author states that, if you take the time to notice, BLESSINGS/MIRACLES occur all the time for you.

I came here this morning pondering on how some of my old ways are coming back and telling myself that I am determined not to let that happen.

You've INSPIRED me on my QUEST even more....

(((((WEAVER)))))

I know. Isn't it wonderful? A miracle is simply a change in perception.

I see how hard you work on yourself. I see how you refuse to back down, or to give in.

You work so hard to become the person you want to become, and I admire that so much about you. I strive to be like that, but get lazy and then you remind me by your self-work that I need to keep working on myself too.

You are a great inspiration around here to women, and to those who don't like who they are...that they can be whoever they want to be. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Mimi,

Ditto what Weaver said!

Your posts and advice to me carry weight, not just because you have been through this yourself, nor just because you have recovered your marriage, nor even that I see us as being similar personalities,,

But mostly because of the continued reflection, study, andjourney of self improvement you choose for your life AND how you so honestly and generously share that here.

You inspire me!

Hey Weaver....

Glad you're back....hope you had a great time away....we missed you.

I emailed that post, btw...the one that you did in Oct. 04 that helped me even though I misunderstood it and got tubed <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />.

I heard a radio discussion about a book The Power of Appreciation whose author stated:


And:



Pretty poignant,huh? At least I thought so.

It seems to go along with the "Attractor Factor" and your statement is so true, too, Weaver:


I didn't read the thread on which you complimented Mimi, but I'm glad you've both started this thread theme. It's a big part of how my H and I have been able to reinvent our M after 32 years of acrimony. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Thanks,
Ace

Hey Ace. I had a really good time on vacation, thank you.



I used to read anything I could get my hands on in spirituality (taking a break from those types of books now though), and I read something that has stuck with me and gives me strength during those times when I fall back into old patterns and resort to old maps I had held of life and the world. It was taken from "Quotes from Conversations with God" that Spacecase has on his website 2long helped with.

"The most important question is not Who are you, but rather Who do you want to become"

I love this because this gives us the freedom to lose the restrictions that we and others have placed on us.

I used to get together with my siblings when my folks were alive and it was like as soon as we all were together for more than a few hours EVERYONE fell into the role they had in our own family dynamics.

I was the middle child and the rebel. The older ones were the brains and the most likely to succed ones. The younger two were the babies, etc.

It was awful to be forced to remain someway just because that was the way you fit into the dynamic, almost like a place card that allowed (or forced) the others to keep their place in the dynamic.

There is a spiritual leader, and I don't remember if it was Kahil Gibran or some other prophet who disenherited his past, COMPLETELY. He said I choose to have no personal history. He had to do that or he would have been able to become what he was to become.

I don't think we have to get that extreme, but it sure does help to see people changes themselves, and to give them the freedom to do just that.

ACE, I haven't been in email and hardly ever am. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to write back. I am not very good at email.

Not a bad idea....

I've been fussing at myself today about getting into MY OLD PATTERNS... as you say, Weaver...over the past two weeks...

Those PATTERNS from CHILDHOOD are so ENGRAINED...CHILDREN REALLY DO LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE...

Why not wipe it out? Start from today and move forward...

It's so hard to do Mimi, especially when you are still around all those people. They need you to stay the same as you always were so they don't have to change.

It is very difficult to do in a long term marriage as well, because you spouse may get scared, or uncomfortable.

So I think the fact that you and Ace's husbands are on board in improving yourselves and changing up things, is a really, really good thing.

I am an avid reader. I just want to pop in here and say that I just started Bad Childhood, Good Life. It is good. I believe everyone could benefit from it in some way.

Susan,

The book that first made me question my childhood, my parents and most importantly my responsibility to "get over it" and live well was "A road less travelled" by M. Scott Peck.

I was pretty young, and my dad was still alive (an alcoholic but sometimes sober back then), and I remember calling him up and just laying into him. I had so much anger at him for the first time in my life, I could barely contain. And him, being the gentle soul he was would just get very quiet on the phone and say things like "yes, I understand", or "okay, honey" while I lambasted him.

It was the beginning of my learning to love people for who they were and not hold them responsible for my life. It started out as intense anger at my parents though. Worked through it and then I could help, espcially my dad, when he was not able to function any longer.

Man, that book caused emotions in me I still can't believe to this day.

HEY, SUSAN!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I have that book and haven't read it yet. I think it will be next on my list.

Weave..I'm gonna go back and read THE ROAD LESS TRAVELED again, too...

THANKS, YOU GUYS!!!

nothing much to say mimi ...'cept hello.

just wanted to thank you for getting me to sorta standing on my own feet...sorta.

i remember that i said to you last year...the reason at times you go thru what you are now...is to help illuminate the path for others....some may not like the medicene you give at times (can i get a amen)...but its good medicine.

just wanted to say luv you and thanks for helping me the best you could.....

nc007