Strive - what does bumping mean?

SG

I'm just pushing it up so that ark can see that you replied to her since your thread was on the second page...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Sometimes a poster will bump something up that interesting and thinks that other posters may find interesting or something like that...

Strive - Thank you.

How are you doing today?

SG

I'm doing well..thank you for asking...it's a nice quiet day here at work...LMAO...so far! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

The kids are suppose to go to their dad's and he'll be bring them to his parents...I hope that they have a good time...I'm looking forward to the weekend...I have alot to do tomorrow...some vol. work...

How are you?

I am hanging in as best as I can. I miss him so much it cripples me. I have so many regrets of what I didn't do and hope and pray it's in G-ds will to give me another chance.

My WH is abolutely gone mad. He doesn't contact his children to speak of, but they don't want to talk to him. I know he misses them, but he just can't bring himself to come home. That's the part I don't understand. He is living in a situation that is amazingly crazy and I find him on the internet more and more. Which is so weird for him. Part of me worries that he is planning something to screw me and part of me can tell he is just in a horrible place and doesn't know how to get out of it or wants to.

I continue to change myself, work on my 4th step in AA and do whatever G-ds puts in front of me to do. But the emptiness in my heart is inconsolable and getting through each day is absolutely a chore. Somedays I pray for G-d to just take me away so I don't have to feel this pain so deep anymore.

How do you do it? What do you do to take care of yourself?

SG

AH, I'm a crazy Al-anon...matter of fact, i'm working at the state convention this weekend...giving back...

I actually showed up at Al-anon for help with dealing with WH's A...at the end of this month I will have been attending for ten months...I rely on my friends there alot...I visit with them, call them...I was a sponge...I'm also working on my 4th step!

So, when's your b-day? LMAO

I really have worked the program in ALL areas of my life...I write sometimes...I make amends when I need too...and then I have here!

I have personal recovery...I have focused on myself and NOT what WH is doing...when I focused on him, I only hurt myself more...I have grown and changed for my benefit...

This is how I've made it! This is how I've cared for myself! By focusing on me!

Strivn -

What have you learned about yourself?

What hopes do you have for the future?

Well, i started learning about myself here...with the help of some amazing people and then, last Sept. i worked up the courage to walk throught the doors of Al-anon...LMAO

I actually thought I was in the wrong place...

With the help on my home group I continued to grow and kept going back not only to my meetings but here...I also read ALOT...

i read about verbal abusive relationship, how to reparent my inner child, passive aggressive behavior, anything that caught my attention...then i started having to face realtiy and own upp to the illusion that I was living...not easy!

Today, I am healthy, happy, work fulltime, take care of my children, and I knw that I'm able to take care of myself...

See if I don't take care of myself, then all the other balls that I was/am juggling fall to the floor...if I'm not okay, then I have no senerity and am not able to deal with the things that come my way...what I am today is what I hope for the future...

Health & happiest...but today I know that I AM the one that's responsible for that, no one else!