HI Everyone.

I have 2 kids and I found out my wife was having an affair 3 months ago. She told me should would end it, and then she convinced me that it was my insecurity(which I've had most of our marriage), and the affair was not real, that it was a friendship that I couldn't handle and she wouldn't be giving it up.
I trusted what she was saying and even though I cuaght them for lunch together one time, and confronted the OM, I still was told that it was a friendship and that it was over between me and my wife... because she couldn't handle my insecurity anymore. We worked it out again, and it happened again.

I didn't go to this site when it first started.

Anyway, 4 days ago, I found another email account just for communicating with him. It's so sickening to think about, but they've been meeting behind my back at every moment she can. She's been depressed for a year and off work, so she has all day with him as well, as He's an old high school teacher that she had a crush on, and he wanted to support her in the depression, but didn't tell me because of my insecurity. Eventually it grew into a very close friendship... or so she says. The affair had been going on under my nose for 8 months, and I was trying so hard with maintaining the house and all, while she layed on the couch portaying a depressed person.

When I found these emails this week, I was so mad that I asked her to leave immediately for a week. Now I'm meeting her today to discuss our plan for the weekend, and I booked a counsellor for Monday to discuss the best way to tell the kids.

I feel so powerless, as I love her, but don't want to be trampled anymore.

The OM is seperated from his spouse and has 2 girls (he's 51, and my wife is 36)... such a fantasy... But do I tell the other man's wife and all our friends about this?

Nobody knew about the affair other than myself.

It feels so sickening... yet it sounds normal...

I'm meeting soon with her, and any advice would be greatly appreciated.

thanks

yrcousin