My last couple posts, on reflection, maybe inappropriate for the title of this post.
I apologize if it's offensive.
Mods please delete offensive posts if necessary.
Thanks.

I'm not sure if you have said so in any of your other threads, but I feel you really need to speak asap to one of the Harleys.
It may also be of help is you keep to one thread as its very hard to follow across one to the other, it just may help those who been through similar to advise you or give you ideas etc.

I do note you saying as of Aug 1 you & the kids are moving ... is that correct? I do feel that it is a wise move as your kids seem to be really upset with the inlaws and mum coming & going at all hours.. maybe they feel unsafe? not secure? be very certain to reassure them YOU are there for them.

Obviously subject to what the experts say it may be a good idea to plan B from what you express your feelings are right now. If so, be sure you are doing it the right way & get some good advice from the harleys & those who have done it here.
If teh kids don't want to visit mum right now make sure some indepenant person logs that? Counsellor appointed by the court? someone like that. Maybe a lawyer can advise you on that.

I do wonder if you have come across to your wife as lecturing over the years??? It may be a result of your job/ profession but sometimes that can have a very negative effect on a partner over time. Such a action may have allowed your WS to use it as an excuse.
It of course just may be the manner you write to try & give a quick picture of where your M is that gives that impression, however it did hit me quite solidly.
But regardless, just so you can be clear on it, there are no justifications for A, no matter what. Your wife CHOOSE to act as she did and is doing. I am a FWS so I know that is 100% true. You didn't 'make' or 'drive' her or to do anything, she CHOOSE.

I suggest that there are probably long term issues in your M and have been for some time. Again expert advice and evaluation is really required to help you in my opinion.

Its probably a good idea to vent & discuss here but also as I said get the Harleys onto it.

Hope the move goes smoothly.

aussieswife,
Yeah, my posts are getting scattered (brained). Sent a message to Harleys.
The mention of lecturing. I so agree with that. My counselor has helped me to better my conversation as to lessen that. My wife has said she felt I was lecturing too. Kids too. ME too.
It's gotten better. Kids haven't complained in awhile. I've worked really hard at it.
Intersting the connection you made between my work and lecturing. Never thought of it that way. I just thought I was an "as**hole" as my wife would say.
I wonder if years of reading manuals and writing data sheets have done this? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
I'm actually planning to take some writing courses this fall. Maybe that can help the way I write. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I've read SAA, HNHN, etc. I would like to hear more about others Plan B.
The divorce and me leaving are to get distance and detach as above. I hadn't thought of it as a Plan B or LRT, at least not initially. I just wanted to be out of this mess and as I didn't see any hope at a R.

Thanks.

Aussiewife,
I had a consultation with S Harley on Mon. Thanks for the tip. What a guy he is. He though I've been guided well by my couselor. He heard my Plan B letter also.

All,
I've moved my kids and I out and have taken the majority of the household. I will also by filing for sole custody. Sent the Plan B letter today.

My current saga, including Plan B Letter are cronicled here:
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...ID=#Post3285970

Thanks.

Bump. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />