Ill try to make this short . . . been married for almost 9 years, been together over 11 and have two kids. I have always had trust issues from previous BAD relationships so from the beginning I had a hard time trusting my husband but gave him the benefit of doubt.
I always suspected him of using drugs even after I warned him several times about using once we got married. He always 'seemed' to comply. He had a habit of staying out late, well after midnight several times a week during the beginning of our marriage. That behavior dwindled down to about 2-4 times a month of the staying out late.
Finally a year and a half ago, he confessed that he might need drug counseling. I was SO devistated because everytime I confronted him with his odd behavior he made me feel like I was crazy. But strange things kept happening.
Over the last year, the drug use has subsided from what I can tell (but who am I to judge right?) Just in the past month, he has been out til 2-3 in the morning during the week. We are both 8-5'ers so I dont know how he does it. He normally goes to his friends house, 'for something' and he will show up HOURS later.
He took me to lunch not even two weeks ago to tell me everything is going to be different 'you will see'. Well just Monday he called at 10pm to tell me he was on his way home and he'd be home in an hour . . . well 4 hours later he finally made it home. We havent spoken since. I havent shed a tear cause I have no emotion left.
Weve been through marriage counceling, my parents know, Ive talked to friends etc etc etc. Am I just asking to much?? For my husband not to be out late, or to tell me he is goig to be home and then hours later he finally come home?
His cell phone bill had over 75 text messages posted to it, he is not a text messenger person, not to mention there are a vast number of LATE phone calls during the times he is out late.
Is this just a lost cause?? What am I missing?? Am I crazy or is this just obnoxious behavior. Is this normal for husbands to stay out this late? He's 44, he should know better by now right? He should be an adult right?? Or is that just in the eye of the beholder.
What am I missing or have I been that snowballed that Im starting to think its ok. agh!!
