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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
Hi there,
My passive-agressive WH isn't enjoying the fact that his control over me is slipping. I am guessing on that to be honest. But he did call a friend and told him that things were tough. He NEVER talks about his A, only idle crap.
He complained that I was not talking to him as much. I do know that she is starting to train him by cleaning and making demands of responsibility on him. He is broke because he is putting just about all of his paycheck in our account so I can keep us afloat. This week he did question the money a little bit more, but my answers are reasonable so I don't think that will change.
Both his friend and I think he has backed himself into a corner and is still choosing to not come out.
What should I do or not do? Who understand the passive-agressive mind a little to help me understand things. It continues to be over 2 months where he has no contact with his kids and he is still living in a crazy place, but he won't come home.
I continue to work on myself as in Plan A, but since we have no contact he isn't seeing any of it at all. Any words of wisdom?
SG
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,454
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,454 |
he's not passive agressive, he's an adulterer.
do not analyze and diagnose him, analyze and diagnose you!
You can't control him, you can control you.
~ Pain is a given, misery is optional ~
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
Ouch <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
So leave it in G-ds hands and just continue to work on me?
SG
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,454
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,454 |
yes ma'am. get yourself to a meeting tonight.
~ Pain is a given, misery is optional ~
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
What a great idea. Thank you for the brick against the head.
If this weren't so serious and real life it would be comical.
Warmly,
SG
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,454
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Member
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,454 |
just remember... God has a bigger imagination than you or I do. Let God take care of your husband. You work on fixing you and stay out of God's way. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
~ Pain is a given, misery is optional ~
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Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463
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Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463 |
I wanted to ask again if you were working your program, how many meetings to you go to in a week?
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
I go between 3 - 5 a week. I talked to my sponsor daily and am currently working on my 4th step. I ask daily for patience to G-d as I turn over my WH. Some days I do better than others. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> SG
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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