The Sun is brighter in Louisisana Today!

Outstanding performance of athlete ability last night by our guys! I'm expecting Dorsey to go in the 1st round of the draft! AND WE'RE NUMBER 1!!!!

GOT TO LOVE THOSE POLLS!!!!

GO SEC!!! That such was some great Tigerbait! GRRRRRR!!!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I have to say I was worried in the first quarter the way we started out with that run for 10! But my boys came throught!

I'll be searching for new shirts for me and the boys...

Think we proved ourselves to be THE REAL TIGERS!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

What you think E? LMAO

Beautiful day! Absoletely BEAUTIFUL!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Fight For LSU

"Like Knights of old, let's fight to hold the glory of the Purple Gold. Let's carry through, let's die or do to win the game for dear old LSU! Keep trying for that high score--come on and fight, we want some more, some more! Come on you Tigers, FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT or dear old L-S-U! RAH!"

"Hey Fighting Tiger"

"Hey, Fightin' Tigers, fight all the way! Hey, Fightin' Tigers, win the game today. You've got the know how, you're doing fine, hang on to the ball as you hit the wall and smash right through the line! You've got to go for a touchdown, run up the score. Make Mike the Tiger stand right up and roar--ROAR! Give it all of your might as you fight tonight, and keep the goal in view! Victory for L-S-U!"

Congratulations for your Tiggers!

I'm always glad when OSU gets knocked off... they're a pain to deal with in our conference when they get the big egos going <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Sounds like you're doing well.. just keep your prayers and your eyes focused on Him and you will get the direction you need.

Thanks James...one thing I have learned through this whole process is that STBX is not the center of my universal...there are other things in life...wonderful things...

I may be considering Recon. for down the road...but one things I don't think you all understand is that I'm not settling...granted he has really stepped up to the plate with that boys and that is WONDERFUL! I'm glad that they have that, but FOR ME, I need more...

I have met some wonderful people and it has been hard to get use to be treated so well...it's still hard...I have learned alot about me even within the last few weeks...

I just don't want you guys to think that I'm going to settle, I wouldn't be happy and personally I've found that I like being happy...instead of angry and resentful all the time and If I settled then I would be right back to where I was to begin with...that's not a life!

Oh Yeah, OHio needed a little something, something! They are bleeding Purple and Gold today! LMAO <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Yes, they proved themselves to be the REAL Tigers this time.

This time!!!

Get Out of here! I hope Clemson was watching last nigth...they could use some pointers on how to play football! LMAO...

:Oh, I'm in trouble now boys and girls!: LMAO <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Too bad our teams cannot play each other so this argument can be decided on the field.

Remember we POJA'ed to agree to disagree on this topic <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

But did we POJA to end the conversation? Or not pick on each other?

I DON'T THINK SOOOOOO!

BLAHAHAHAHA!

Yes, I would love to see that and you would never live it donw with we kicked your butt! LMAO <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I was thinking maybe I don't know what "normal" is...so what's reasonable treatment from someone that loves you?

Does that question may any sense? When you are in a relationship with someone what should you expect?

I guess on my birthday, mother's day, etc...I didn't know if I was going to be getting something or not...is it wrong to expect that? Or a surpise gift, card, flowers from time to time? i didn't get that either...would have been awesome!

I don't think I even know what I'm trying to ask...

Well.. what I'm reading into that is:

Now that I've set these expectations for what I want from a husband in my life, is it ok to lower them if they're about little things like gifts and tokens of affection which would mean that my EN for affection isn't met the way I'd like it to be?


My answer to that.. if what I'm reading is what I'm reading: No, it's not ok.


I'm sure over the time you've spent, you've come up with a pretty good list of things you'd like to see in a man.

I'd say take the top 10 most important of those, and toss the rest.

Either that, or look at your EN's questionnare.. take the top 5.. if he can't completely meet those top 5 needs, or you can't meet his.. you're settling if you stay.

you are not wrong to want or expect those things.

love should make you feel like the special and unique person that you truly are.

Love is much more than a feeling...it is a choice that is backed up by actions that are always in the best interest of the person you choose to love.

Rin, I suspect strongly that what your H has given you is anything but love....turn what he has given you 180 degrees and most likely you would be able to define true love.

Rin, NORMAL is what got us all here in the first place.

The MB Plan is not really about NORMAL. It’s about doing the extraordinary to care for your partner and protect your boundaries. His Needs Her Needs, POJA, defining and protecting boundaries, the 15 minimum hours of contact etc..... All the things most of us were not doing before finding ourselves as destroyed newbie’s at the Gates of MB.

Rin, POWS did not commit adultery because he wanted to be alone and on his own. And now he is alone and guess what?; it’s time to be nice to Rin again. Start to be a Dad a little bit again? Coincidence? Probably not.

Rin, spend a few hours and reread your whole thread/s. Where have you really been and how far have you come. Rin, please be careful and protect yourself and your boys.

Okay, you know I said that i needed to do the ENQ again a while back...but I didn't I'm going to take it again today and REALLY LOOK at THAT!

Yeah, I can definitily say that my EN were not met...i'll have to take a look at which ones were not and which were were and put that together...

that will give me a good basis for anyone in my life...

I do know this I liked doing for him...I like doing for OP...it's the way I express myself...I got awefully tired of doing for him and not getting anything in return in my mind...

Thanks guys! I'm going to figure this thing out yet...I KNOW I'm not giving in...

I can be very stubborn and hard headed when I want to be and you know what -I want to be right now!-

Chris- I will do that...I happen to have printed most of my threads up until Sept.'s court date...I keep them in the trunk of my car...Two three inch binders...since you mentioned HNHN, perhaps I need to read that again also...

Oh, I spent a whole lot of time with him but it was not undivided attention...the kids, the TV, the computer, the MOTORCYCLE...something was always involved and I felt like he was uncomfortable spending time with JUST ME!

Your WH needs to come back to you BROKEN and REPENTANT..bottom line...

Do your reading and your learning for your NEXT RELATIONSHIP or for your R with him if he REALLY comes back to you being a CHANGED MAN...

First there has to BE SUFFERING..before he is CHANGED...

DO NOT RELIEVE HIM OF HIS SUFFERING!!!

I got you Mimi...I'm thinking for my next R, this is strictly to know ME and what I need/want...b/c personally I believe that the growth he would have to achieve at this point in time is more than he can handle...to be with me!

It occurred to me that he is still falling and I can't impede that process...

I think that the reason I have been going back and forth on the process is BECAUSE he is familiar...

I'm going to get out of his way...i'm recapping this stuff for me...


yes, he came over last nigth, we watched the game...didn't tlak about anything else...course, I wasn't exactly happy that he was coming over anyway after reading the posts here...he was just taking up space as far as I was concerned...

We didn't sit next to each other...I won't have allowed that anyway...he ate, he watched TV, he played with the kids until it was their bedtime and he left immediately after the game...

I went about my life while he was there...i was Tming my mom and SD, a few friends... I checked my email...whatever...

He was TMing whoever...and I didn't care...I thought this is no different than before except I have a life now! ME, i'm different, not him, except with the kids...

needless to say that got me started thinking this morning...

I'm not doing a PBL...I got to see what I needed to...with you all's help! Thank you! I just need some more help getting where I'm going!

I can't relate to you having NO REACTION to him INVADING YOUR SPACE..gives me the shivers...

A MAN WHO HAS TREATED YOU SO BADLY, HAS NOT EVEN BEGUN TO APOLOGIZE can just sit there....

I am much more TERRITORIAL...

To me that is ICKY, Rin...

I could barely sit in the same room with my WH without my heart beating fast..I wanted to leap out of my skin..looking out for the WH to return... when we first began RECOVERY...

THE WALKING WOUNDED is what we were...

You seem so APATHETIC...

It's creepy to me...

You felt that you were FREE to do anything that you wanted with him sitting there..YUCK..

You are not RESPECTING yourself, Rin..

He has NO RIGHT to do this...

He needs to DESERVE the HONOR of YOUR PRESENCE...

This is NOT GODDESS BEHAVIOR...

Rin,

IMHOI, I agree with Mimi. He should not have that kind of access to you now...or ever. Frankly, I wouldn't trust him....nor would I want an abusive, cheater that has stolen from me sitting in my home watching a game.

Keep things in perspective.

I got bored with watching the game with him after awhile...

he agravated me about an hour into it when that Darn phone...

I even said something about him having a GF and he said that he didn't have one and kind of like rolled his eyes or made a face...I asked what the face was for and he said nothing...

I even said something I shouldn't have about him being on that phone enough tonight...he didn't like that either...

I told you guys I don't feel that I'm in danger anymore...he would have to be angry with me to begin with...he's not the type to JUST do something...the only time he has ever done anything he has been angry...i -KNOW- this man...I've spent the last 15 years with him...

i felt like I didn't know him when he was doing that stuff...


I think I gained some from last night and today...thank you! Perspective that is...

I agree that he was abusive, I agree that he is a cheat...i don't agree that he is dangerous...and I agree that he has taken/stolen things that didn't belong to him...most community property...

I got the point the first time