|
|
Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 344
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 344 |
What an insult this is! I got notification that my Child Support is increasing for Cost of Living Adjustment (COLA). The notification is sent from the "Probation Department" from the county I'm registered in.
You get this thing in the mail with a return address "Probation Department" making it sound like your some kind of common "thug".
Isn't that sweet?
*Together 16 yrs.
*Married 13 yrs.
*Daughter born 1/96
*Separated 4/15/00
*D Day 6/20/00 (her HS sweetheart)
*10/01/00 STBXW moves with daughter 3 hours away
*Divorced 9/10/01 (day before US attacked)
*XW got married 9/21/02 (her HS sweetheart)
*In a "committed" relationship since 2003.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,638
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,638 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 1,717
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 1,717 |
Is this the first Notice you've received? I would find that odd seeing as you have been divorced since '01.
Several states permit (COLA) adjustments to child and/or spousal support. Some do it annually, others bi-annually. There should be language in your divorce degree stipulating how often this would occur.
I agree that the Probation Dept. stigma kinda sucks.
ba109
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199 |
Cat, I thought you'd dropped off the face of the earth.
How are you? I hope life is treating you well (other than this).
I thought (if you are still in our state) that parent's could request a reassessment of CS (due to pay raises, etc), but most don't. So I'm guessing this is from your X's state.
Most of us don't like the court system, and this is a good example of why.
It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 344
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 344 |
"What state are you in?"
NJ
"Is this the first Notice you've received? I would find that odd seeing as you have been divorced since '01.
Several states permit (COLA) adjustments to child and/or spousal support. Some do it annually, others bi-annually. There should be language in your divorce degree stipulating how often this would occur."
No. I'm not complaining about the COLA, only the way I'm being branded as part of a "probation" entity, like I'm some kind of pedophile or sex offender.
"How are you? I hope life is treating you well (other than this)."
Doing well Newly, hope you and your girls are too! Thanks!
"So I'm guessing this is from your X's state."
No, it's from Hunterdon County. I'm a Probation Thug!
*Together 16 yrs.
*Married 13 yrs.
*Daughter born 1/96
*Separated 4/15/00
*D Day 6/20/00 (her HS sweetheart)
*10/01/00 STBXW moves with daughter 3 hours away
*Divorced 9/10/01 (day before US attacked)
*XW got married 9/21/02 (her HS sweetheart)
*In a "committed" relationship since 2003.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199 |
I may be in that courthouse again soon. You no longer live in the county, do you? Does it always stay here? I still drive down your old road frequently.
X is threatening to sue for more custody. (it's a shame that he doesn't use all his custody now, or take any time when offered). I don't remember if you read last year when X filed a suit because I moved 25 miles. Judge was not happy with X given the wording of the decree, and thought it was a huge waste of court's time.
I hope you are seeing your DD as much as possible (given the distance). It would be a shame to miss out on how smart they become as they grow up.
It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 39
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 39 |
Hi... I would have guessed NJ. I was just up at a lawyer training class in NJ this week, and we covered some family law stuff, and that's where I heard the term "probation department" for the first time. Don't feel too bad about it. It seems that it's the standard process for child support. For what it's worth, NJ is taking a concerted effort to keep the psychology of divorce less alienating than before ("parenting time" vs. "visitation").
WBF
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199 |
And NJ leans more toward shared parenting (ie. 50/50) than many other states).
Last edited by newly; 08/04/07 10:32 AM.
It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 5,575
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 5,575 |
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> oh my god...i run a kids probation community service program and recieve tons of mail everyday from them...never ever thought what the postal people were thinking!!! lol <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> they probably think were a bunch of degenerates!!!lol don't sweat it!
what we do in life......echoes in eternity!
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
|
0 members (),
151
guests, and
35
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,622
Posts2,323,490
Members71,947
| |
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
|
|
|
|
