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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 132
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 132 |
New here. I found out about my husband's affair 7 months ago. It is so comforting to read all your stories and know that I am not alone. But it's sad so many of us are going through this nightmare. I am giving my husband legal seperation papers this weekend. And I'm kinda nervous about it. From reading alot of everyone's posts I understand more of what to expect since my WS is following the typical pattern.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Are you seperated, sl77? What is the status of your marriage, how long married, any kids? Are you seperating because you have given up? Is he still seeing the OW?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 215
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 215 |
Hi SL,
Sorry to see you here but you have come to the right place.
Can you give us more info on your situation. Have you exposed his affair and have you tried to follow plan A at all.
Is it possible you could hold back on the L/S papers. I'm not a pro but they do say to fix your marriage it may be necessary to be separated before coming back together. However in saying that they do recommend you follow plan A at least for 3 months before going to plan B which may include L/S.
Regards
HAF
Together 10 Years
Married 14 Febuary 04
DD 6 March 2007
DS8 & DS9
BS 38(me)
WS 39
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 132
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 132 |
We've been married 13 years. Two kids. I did a pretty good plan A. But he's in the "fog" big time. I have no desire to save my marriage anymore. I suspect there were other affairs. I've gone thru all the rollercoaster emotions and the past 2 weeks I haven't had the energy to deal with it anymore. I'm doing the separation papers to give myself a little more time to get my life together before I file for divorce.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Gotcha! We are here to support you, sl77. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 132
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 132 |
I'm still astounded that my WH can still think he's a wonderful father, who puts his kids first, when he CHOOSES to not even live in the same state as them!! AHHH!
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
A legal seperation might be a good thing. The affair will undoubtedly end, and you won't have to go through all the day to day horror. Then you may still feel like taking him back.
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 132
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 132 |
I'm sure this affair will end. Just as I'm sure there'll be another one. Unless God has a miracle planned.
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