To All,
My husbands affair has been going on for about 7 months- is it too late to expose the affair to everyone and/or too late for Plan B? I was in shock so I have been hesitant to try things.

Thank you.

If the affair is still going on, NOW is the time to expose, and expose to everyone who supports your marriage, and that can make a positive influence on your H, to get him to stop the A.

Plan B is only effective after a very diligent Plan A, and that's what you should be doing daily now.

Shattered Dreams,
Thanks for your advice. I am very sad everyone tells me to give up. People can call my husband but I have told them not to b/c I don't want him to be embarrased. I am at a loss as to what to do. I want to save us but I am at a loss. Unfortunately, he is angry with me for past feelings and Plan B is just causing him to move closer to OW. I am guessing she is turning him - she has a lot to lose if he comes back. Thanks for any advice.

You don't want HIM to be embarassed?!??! We as people have guilt so we know when we've done something wrong. I usually don't post but... HELLO!! Stop enabling his behavior. HE SHOULD BE ASHAMED! would you shield a child molestor, or a drug addict because you don't want them to be ashamed?

If you have people who can put pressure on him, GOOD

YOU CAN DO THIS.

I don't see any mention of your plan A. Don't even think of doing Plan B until you've done plan A unless you are already living seperately and have minimal contact. Plan A is to demonstrate your ability to improve you and to meet the WS's needs. (its NOT easy)

ITS YOUR CHOICE TO TRY, ITS YOUR MARRIAGE, NOT SOMEONE ELSES.

Plan B is when the spouse is sucking up all the benefits of plan A and still isnt budging from the fence thier sitting on. (*EDITED*) Its also to seperate yourself from the pain to preserve any love you have left in your love bank for your spouse, not the WS, but the S. (*EDITED*)

Correct me if I'm wrong .. but your name indicates to me.. that your a Stay at home mom right, and he brings in the majority, if not all the income for the household right?

If thats the case then you AND your kids depend on this man to support financially, cherish and protect all of you, his family.

I dont mean to be so crabby, but i just found a fly in my coffee and I need a cigarette.

You AND your kids have ALOT more to lose then the OW. You really want the OW's hands in you AND your kids financial resources?

Shut her down (OW), its time to take action.

Sahmom - you have been on MB for 12 days and you have 13 threads. There is no rule about how many different threads you can have, but jumping around to so many makes it extremely hard to figure out your story.

Please stick with one thread. From what I've been able to figure out from your posts, I think your marriage is very saveable. Please post your story on one thread and stay there. Include how long you have been married, number of children, problems in marriage before the affair, and how your husband and OW met, and OW's situation.

Then the folks here can help you get a plan.