Yes believer, I have gotten to the point now where I know that I no longer NEED my wife. I am capable of living my life without her. I just don't want to. It has taken time to get here, but when I see her now I am a long way from the pathetic needy sobbing mess that I was before.

Also I am totally confident and capable with our son who is 2yrs. We share custody and I have am really enjoying every minute of it. The thing that gets me down is when I see other families having fun together and I think of our situation and I just think its wrong, wrong wrong! I always get dressed up nice when going to see her too.

Any other changes you could suggest?

I would do some thinking about how you interact with your parents and your wife, since that is one of the things she was complaining about.

Yes, I actually did that. 2 months ago I went home to europe for a break from all this. I spoke to my mother and sorted out a lot of things and WW knows this. The problem is that with the exposure of the A they all know everything and can't believe that I still want her. Its like just when I sorted things out she went and dug a bigger whole!

They really don't understand the WW and the fog etc. If I am happy to stay married to her they will support me but they don't condone what she is doing and don't want anything to do with her at the moment.

What am I to do?

Glad you got it sorted out. I didn't realize your parents lived so far away. I thought they were close, and always rubbing your wife the wrong way.

Exercise, stay in good shape, and make a nice life for yourself. I'm sure she will be along shortly.

I spoke to a friend today and he said his wife picked WW up from work on thursday and she was very upset but did not go into details. She also finished work early on friday and saturday because she was upset. This is all after my exposure on wednesday. I really am starting to believe that the A is finally over! How long till my wife reappears?

I am just a little confused as to where I go from here. Should I just stay clear of WW and give her a little time or should I suggest that we all go to the beach on sunday as a family? Its her weekend with our Son and I don't want to come accross as putting pressure on. What do you think?

Invite her, but don't expect her to want to go. She still wants to "wait". If she doesn't, go without her, have fun and take pictures to share with her.

Ok. I just don't want it to look like I'm chasing her you know? The idea is for me to attract her back but its hard. Where's Melody?

Oh, she might be spending time with her husband.

Don't chase her, just casually invite her. If she says no, then go and have fun. Then leave her alone for another couple days and invite her to dinner - family things are good at first. And try to have fun, and don't talk relationship talk.

I just got a call from WW she says we can't keep going on like this. She has called the solicitor to resend the letter. She wants to sell the house and says we need to move on as we are still emotionally and financially attached to each other. She said its not all about the OM she was not happy for a long time. She said she gave me nothing and vice versa.

She says its not fair to keep going like this and she will always be looking for someone else. I asked her to talk to steve harley and she refused. She has made up her mind. I then asked her to look at some info on this site and she says I am pressuring her again. I said I was not. I said I am totally in love with her at the moment but I so love her. I asked why I was the only one willing to work to turn this into something wonderful? She says thats impossible and thats all fairytale stuff and doesn't feel that way and never will.

What do I do now? This is really unexpected the A is over

Wait another week. This is just more fog talk. Go out and enjoy yourself.

Also I wouldn't show her this site just yet.

I am not so sure beleiver. She sounded very calm and had thought it through a lot. I just want her to read the basic concepts and maybe do an emotional needs questionere. She is just so sure that she will never be happy with me

A lot has happened. WW is sending solicitors letter she wants to sell everything. Sould receive it later today. Went home and found she has set up another email account and has contacted OM! He replied once with a new email address. So far she has sent 2 more asking him does he still want her and she loves him very much but he hasn't replied yet? I got a little drunk last night and sent WW a few texts about leaving OM alone and working on marriage etc. I told her cousins husband about her still begging OM and he had a fight with his wife (WW cousin) about it.

WW went to see cousin earlier and then phoned me saying if I don't leave her alone she will get a restraining order against me? We are over regardless of OM blah blah......
Her cousin's husband then called me and said she had called him too and he says she is going to the cops. I have not said anything threatening to her ever all the texts have been about working on marriage.

I think I need to go to plan B at this stage any advice?

Where is everyone?

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> What in the world is she going to tell them? "Mr. policeman, my H called my cousin and ratted me out for my affair!!!" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />

Don't go into plan B, just sit back and take it easy. You did right to call the OMW again and keep her in the loop.

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.......................................................................................................................................

I haven't told OMW about contact through new email accounts. I don't want to give up my source just yet. I want to wait and see if OM replies to her and if so what he says. Maybe he is trying to let her down gently? So far he hasn't responded to her asking if he still wants her.

Oh and I told her it was pathetic what she was doing begging a married man.....is that a LB? Couldn't help it. She then said I was pathetic and SHE DOESNT WANT ME ANYMORE. I am getting close to giving up? It sure sounds like she means it with or without OM

And her cousin and her friend sat her down and said she has to stop stringing me along and move on with her life. Thats why she wants to sell the house etc.... These people are SO NOT HELPING

Tell her you are not interested in selling the house but only interested in working on the marriage.


oh yes, and she sure is clear headed, now, isn't she?? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Vladie, please calm down. She is a addict who is going into withdrawal right now. She is not in her right mind. Just ride this out and stop getting excited at every fogbabble that comes out of her mouth. When she talks, here is what it really is: Vladie's wife <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Ok I will try and calm down. I will have to see a solicitor though and tell them I am not interested in cooperating with her and try and drag it out.....

What if OM replies and its all back on again? What do I do then? Exposure doesn't seem to be working?