Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 53
R
Member
OP Offline
Member
R
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 53
Post deleted by RspctLostAtDay1

I am the Husband that did not want to ever be like my father. I seemed like the one during courtship, and thought that I was the one. 6 years of disrespect through neglect and now Wife is done. She sees that I was never going to stop looking at porn behind her back, and I could never own up to why. She sees that I am sexist and degrading from the beginning of marriage, which she was pregnant.

Seems like I loved her, up until I got her to put on ring, then I saw her as a "mommy", and then all the stereotypes that I denied ever believing, I started to play out. Did not understand self, and disrespected wife, many lies. Otherwise, show lots of Love.

Now she is done, sees nothing in me to believe in. I am only owning up, and trying to change now that I do not have the "upper hand" that I thought I had. Please, is there enough reason for her to want me to stay?

She sees that I am a great father, and I have shown her compassion, but not in the sexual department. I have had no sexual relationship, in her eyes, if I was lying and looking at porn behind back. Now I realize that I have been acting out sexist views that I never wanted to be. I have been more like my Father then I ever realized! Man, I am changing, but she sees nothing to look back on in the marriage, and courtship was too long ago. Where to start regaining trust? Trying so much, and seeing counselor. This site helps, but she has lost faith in MAN-kind! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> [color:"blue"] [/color]

Last edited by RspctLostAtDay1; 10/06/07 05:31 PM.
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
O
Member
Offline
Member
O
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
You don't need our opinion. You need a plan. Go read His Needs/Her Needs and Surviving an Affair. You are behind in the M department and need to get out of the selfish mode and catch up.

L.

Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 53
R
Member
OP Offline
Member
R
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 53
I've read all the info and make great advancements, but my question is should she look forward to, and how does she stop feeling like I am just one of the many men that don't respect women, and she doesn't just want me to change my opinions because I am at the point of losing my "power" over her. She has read all of the info, also, and wanted what she saw me for when we got married. I was not that. "wolf in sheep's clothing.


Engaged-1 yr.
Married-6 yrs.
Kids-4 and 6
W-3 yrs older
Young couple headed for 30.

Moderated by  Fordude 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,071 guests, and 57 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mike69, petercgeelan, Zorya, Reyna98, Nofoguy
71,829 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5