MIL has been on my side. She recently asked me for the number of OP. I did not give it to her because I am not sure whether it is a good idea for her to call OP. Any suggestion? Thanks!

My story: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...e=0#Post3311416

I say give it to her. The reason for exposing the A to people like your family is to see if they can assist in ending it. Sounds like your MIL wants to assist in any way she can.

Ditto. And thank your MIL.

Let her call. Hopefully the OP will be angry and complain to your wife about her mother. Excellent!

Turmoil is good. Give it to anyone who asks and wants to blast OM.

Can I have it too???? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

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My MIL single-handedly ended my wife's affair.

She threatened OM within an inch of his life.

She made him break up with my wife the very next day. He was also NOT allowed to tell my wife why he was ending it (she didn't find out for about a year that my MIL did it).

My MIL knew OM. OM was her high school boyfriend that she never really liked. My MIL knew his parents and knew he was a good ole boy. She mustered every back woods moxy she could to firmly instill in him that he was hurting her daughter, son-in-law and mostly her granddaughter and she'd personally see him dead before he ruined her granddaughters life.

She also embellished a few things which OM would have no idea about. She insinuated her own daughter was mentally unstable (which in the fog they all are) and she warned OM that I was of Greek heritage and my family certainly wouldn't stand by and allow him to steal my wife without some almost mafia type consequences. She gave OM the illusion my family WAS greek mafia (I gave her this one to use) though it couldn't be further from the truth but how was OM supposed to know.

OM bought it hook, line and sinker. OM's are generally wimps. When push comes to shove they RUN. There are plenty of other...less difficult women out there. MIL's call just blew up the affair fantasy of living happily ever after right out of the water.

You see...affairees all like to fool themselves that eventually every one else will be accepting of their choices. They purposefully hide themselves from friends and family to avoid anyone telling them otherwise. My MIL's call shattered the illusion and OM just disappeared.

May you be so fortunate. God bless your MIL for even trying.

Mr. Wondering

p.s.- I assure my MIL, prior to the call...that no matter the outcome I was sure to continue to include her in my daughters life.

Trust me...

I was very hesitant about my MIL calling OM.

I also regretted it immediately thereafter (before I saw the results of such call).

Your wife's affair ISN'T going to go away by ignoring it.

Your marriage can survive her anger and upset...it can not survive an ever deeping, secretive and never ending adulterous relationship.

MIL should be given the number.

OM's parents should be called too.

The pastor should be told and church discipline invoked.

Your wife keeps talking about being OK with God because she's TRYING to convince herself of the same. Deep down SHE KNOWS it's not OK (my wife certainly did).

BTW...despite your wife's words to the contrary LOVE is a choice. She's already vowed (chosen) to love you...EXCLUSIVELY. For her to betray her vows is to betray herself.

Mr. Wondering

Wow you are lucky! My MIL only speaks German, and says her son should do whatever makes him happy, even if it is an affair and destroying a good marriage.