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How to "out" a cheating husband?
#1957365 10/19/07 06:42 AM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 23
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hoping2heal
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hoping2heal
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 23
Here's the situation. I just found out that a guy that FWH has been friends with since college extensively cheats on his wife. Even FWH says it's disgusting and he only stays "friends" with this guy for business reasons.
I feel the need to tell the poor wife about her husband's activities. Not my business, but I would like someone to tell me if they knew my H was a cheater. But I don't know her. I met her briefly years ago. And I don't want it known that it is me informing her because that could cause more trouble for my M.
So I don't know how to go about it. They live in another city and I don't know her email address. I thought about sending an anonomys letter but realized they would know who it was due to the postmark.
Any ideas how I can inform this woman and what to say so that she believes me?
Re: How to "out" a cheating husband?
hoping2heal #1957366 10/19/07 07:29 AM
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 4,554
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ManInMotion Offline
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ManInMotion
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Quote
Here's the situation. I just found out that a guy that FWH has been friends with since college extensively cheats on his wife. Even FWH says it's disgusting and he only stays "friends" with this guy for business reasons.

IMO that's a total copout by your H. He's giving you an excuse, and IMO a poor one at that, for his behaviour. Ask your H if he ever mentioned to his friend what he thinks of his behaviour. Ask him if he ever found himself having to lie on his friend's behalf to cover up his behaviour.

You see, that's one of the nasty things about adultery. When someone you know is cheating, and you continue to remain within their circle of friends without doing something about it, you may eventually find yourself becoming part and parcel of the cheating process. Your H needs to protect himself and your M by removing himself from that situation.


Quote
And I don't want it known that it is me informing her because that could cause more trouble for my M.

I suggest reviewing Harley's comments on POJA to see if it's applicable here.

ManInMotion
===========
(see "MiM's Story" for more details)
Re: How to "out" a cheating husband?
ManInMotion #1957367 10/19/07 08:00 AM
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Texas
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MelodyLane Offline
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MelodyLane
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Texas
h2h, I would pick up the phone and just call her. You can disguise your # with *67 and explain to her that you need to be anonymous for various reasons but want to help her.

Your H is acting shamefully, btw.

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101

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