Good morning eveyone, any advice would be greatly appreciated. I'm getting married in less than 2 weeks and fiance chose to go to a strip bar with his buddies when I told him I would be highly offended and disappointed if he went. I told him two weeks before to make my feelings clear. When we talked about it he said it was no big deal, guy thing, how much he loved me and how he wouldn't do it again -- just a "guy thing". I repeated my convictions but I'm online because we had a really big fight last night. He didn't considering my feelings and went anyway. I feel disrespected, not only because I don't like the idea of the man I love oogling naked women, lap dances etc., I'm mostly upset because he doesn't respect or honor my hurt and chose to gratify himself and neglect my concerns. I told him it hurt me and all of my calm explanations that then escalated to screaming and walking away -- he still can't respect my pain. I'm very angry and very hurt.[color:"black"] [/color]

treasure,
what a perfect name! Seems like your fiance doesn't realize just how much of one you are. I suggest counseling before this marriage. If he thinks this is no big deal, then you have big problems already. I would not have allowed my H to do strip bar under any circumstances, and when he did decide to impress the guys 23 years later it cost us our marriage. 4 kids, so much pain that may never be healed.
Do you future a favor, he needs to understand NOW why impressing the guys is something he had to do over your feelings. This is clearly a lack of respect. You deserve to be married to a grown up. Not a pubescent teen male pleaser. If he thinks you are hurt for nothing, then maybe you are. Maybe he should be nothing to you. Maybe you are being spared a miserable life by seeing him for the selfish jerk at heart that he is. Selfishness destroys marriage eventually because selfish people feel entitled to THEIR happiness at any cost. Your kids will mean nothing one day when he decides to impress the colleagues at work by stopping off at the bar on Thursdays, saying it's a business mtg., then when the local ****** figures out he's got a house, good job, and is vulnerable because he's selfish ******, she'll make her moves, and because the guys are egging it on it'll go too far, til he can't stop it, the ****** will ruin him, and you, and your kids, all because husband is a selfish [censored] who only thinks what he wants matters. This has been my first hand experience. Hope it gives you something to think about.
Also, i don't know if you are a Christian, but if you are, run, don't walk from this man. Marriage is too hard to marry someone with different morals.

HBC