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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31
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OP
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31 |
Since making a 100% decision to divorce my husband, I feel guilty and depressed about it. Although he has cheated, chose his girlfriend over me, abused me physically, emotionally and etc.; I feel like I am doing him wrong by divorcing him. Is this normal? I am tired of him treating me like this and yes, I really want him out of my life but why do I feel like I am doing him wrong? I have never had so much fear and doubt. I have been thinking about it all week. Regardless of these feelings, should I go on and divorce him? I have gone through this marriage problem for 4 years and I would think that I would not care how my husband feel or if I am doing him wrong but I do. I have always been the type to make a decision without second guessing but I don't know. Please give me some advice and opinions. I am a nervous wreck!
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 921
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 921 |
Guilt is 100% normal. I felt sooo much guilt for filing for divorce that it almost killed me. Now, 3 years later, I feel I did the right thing. She had no respect for me or our marraige vows.
It does not sound like your WH has any respect for you or your marraige either. Can you tell us why you would want to be married to him?
He let YOU down... you did not let him down.
Keith
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 634
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 634 |
Tania,
I think you are feeling the guilt and fear because of the unkown for your future. He has not given you a reason for you to stay with him and try to work it out. Respect seems as though it has gone out of the window on his part and that is a sign that you are doing the right thing.
"May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day, and may their arms be too short to scratch."
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,398
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,398 |
Most of the time people fear breakups and divorce because they are afraid of their unknown future. They fear that they will never meet someone again or that their lives will be unfulfilled. That is BS.......over time things will get better and better, and trust me....after awhile you will say "what was wrong with me? How could I let myself be treated that way" "I can make it, I can and have moved on" "life is great"!!!
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31 |
Thank you for your reply. I really don't know why I am feeling so guilty because he did treat me bad. Maybe one day I will be glad that I made the decision to divorce him. I am just so uncertain and yet I am sure that this is the right decision. I don't know why I would want to be married to him. Infact, at times I wonder why did I remain in this marriage so long.
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31 |
Hi StartinOver, I am looking forward to things getting better. Yes, now that you mention it I am having lots of concern about my future. It's just that I had such high hopes and dreams for marriage and I was let down. Now I wonder will I ever find the man that will love, respect and honor me. It is such a let down. I put all of "me" into this marriage but my husband did nothing. I can't wait to finally move on with my life and enjoy every minute of it!
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31 |
Hi tally, I do fear my future. He do not respect me like he should. My future plans actually included him and now I don't see how I could go forward with the plans if it has been interrupted like this. However, I know that I am going to have to go on with my life and accomplish my goals. It will be hard but I guess it is not impossible.
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