I really appreciate the additional information about exposure.
"if the affair is over, then apart from OP's Spouse and your children, there is no need to further expose - that would just be punitive. "
Here-in lies the problem - If I expose to OP's Spouse it WILL BE full exposure. He will make sure EVERYONE knows what transpired. I believe he would ONLY use information about his wife with my H to paint their on-going divorce in his favor.
Please don't blast me for not getting the concept that I should tell OPS. I'm still considering it.
Weighing Risks of exposure: "Possibility of re-awakening feelings of the OP and your WS due to the correspondences necessary for the exposure" and "Violence on the part of the OPS"
I think those are very real risks. OPS is an "angry" person, and recovering addict - don't know of him actually acting out though. But worse, I think I don't want my husband thinking about OP and what she's going through. I think OP finally detoxed out of my H's system about 3-4 weeks after D-day and no contact -- and I don't want him to have new reasons to think about her.
I'm going to check out suggested threads - and check back.
As far as proof. I have my H's full admittance - which he won't recant. I have my word - I really don't think anyone would question my knowledge or intent, including OPS. But just in case <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I saved a few photos of her posing for my H that are quite disturbing. Maybe I should sell those to OPS? I AM TOTALLY KIDDING!
