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I need as much input as I can get. I think I made the worst mistake today, but I'm not sure. He is so angry at me. And I am so scared that I've ruined any chance we might've had.
And I'm really losing it emotionally. I had to take an Ambien CR to go to bed tonight & it hasn't kicked in yet.
So any help is so much appreciated.
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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Hey LA,
I'm heading over that way right now...
Semper Fi,
RIF
Me, BS
Her, Forgiven
Married Dec 86
Multiple A's that ended '90
Rebuilding In Faith since then...
Currently deployed to Iraq, but TEXAS is Home!
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Thank you so much! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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Thank you Big Kahuna for your post.
I am off to bed. Hopefully that sleeping pill will kick in. I need to sleep with no dreams of him for 1 night.
Thank you all for your support & guidance.
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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Hi there --
I certainly am NOT a military person, but four things about your post really popped out at me:
Xanax, Lexapro, Ambien, Atavan
That's a LOT of medication to be taking all at once, much of it prescribed by different doctors (hard to tell from the posts).
That you would feel unbearable anxiety at a time like this is absolutely understandable. And I'm sure that's a horrible understatement.
But if you're taking all of these meds, I am wondering if you should see a doctor who specializes in mixing these kinds of meds -- a psychiatrist -- Maybe one recommended by the therapist?
5 children 7-19
Married 20 years
* * * *
Before you speak or write, just ask yourself three questions: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it helpful?
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.
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Oh..don't worry. It's only down to 2 medications now! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
I take Ambien CR to sleep at night and Effexor for the anxiety/panic attacks/depression. The other ones got thrown away.
And yes, I am seeing a psychotherapist and she is wonderful.
And hopefully I'll be making a trip to AZ next week to meet with my husband.
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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I am sticking with my 2 emails to him each day and txt msgs. And I also called his Capt and asked him to please return my call. Also sent an email to SIL to please respect our privacy and my attempts to save my marriage.
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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People, LA needs some support over on "Just Found Out". She just heard from her husband's captain. Anybody? Thanks!
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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I took an Ambien CR. I'm gonna take a nap. I hurt too bad to stay awake. My hands are shaking too bad to type.
I can't stop crying. I just can't.
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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I know WS has the day off. I see he has bought gas in Phoenix. I wonder what he is doing? I wonder if he is with her? It's just eating me away inside.
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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Your supposed to be sleeping! Which is helpful. Trying to track his actions from hundreds of miles away is not.
Give your brain, and emotions a well needed rest!
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LA:
I have been in the military for 15 years and can tell you most likely his chain of command also wants this issue resolved in the best possible way for all parties.
I know that you are worried about what he is doing right now, but it is more helpful for you to focus on what you can do to be strong and knowledgeable.
Hang in there,
onmywayhome
Me - 40
S - 32
Married Jan/2006
5 kids from previous marriage
1 son from current marriage
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I tried to sleep & couldn't. So I balanced the checkbook & paid the bills due on the 15th. I wrote a few emails to friends thanking them for help. And my therapy appt is at 7:30 p.m. And I'm gonna go there & lay on the "couch" and cry into the fabric. I did drink a bottle of water today and ate a protein bar. Which for me is good. I also put on some makeup! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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I just want to tell you I know exactly how you feel. I've been there... You were given some excellent advice in your thread on the other forum. Try not to despair, you will get through this. Sending you some cyber hugs your way.
FWS (me): 38 (EA in May-June 2007)
FWS (H): 35 (EA from oct 2005 to oct 2007)
DS1: 7
DS2: 3.5
S decided he wanted a separation: October 5th 2007
S moved out: October 12th 2007
S moved back in: November 10th
We are working together, one day at a time, one step at a time to build a love that will last forever. Thanks to MB.
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Thank you again everyone.
I went to my therapy appt & the therapist even agreed that I need to be given a chance to mend my marriage. I wonder if this is an EA and not a SA? I dunno fer sure. But I am going to Tucson. I am going to talk to him.
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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Hey LA,
Hang in there and focus on Plan-A... your H's anger will eventually subside. Work on showing him your best side!
I've got to run outside the wire for a bit but will check back with you later on this afternoon...
Semper Fi,
RIF
Me, BS
Her, Forgiven
Married Dec 86
Multiple A's that ended '90
Rebuilding In Faith since then...
Currently deployed to Iraq, but TEXAS is Home!
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RIF, I know what "outside the wire" means. Please, please be careful. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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Posts: 6,087
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Hey LA - Had a safe trip... hope you got some sleep this evening...
Semper Fi,
RIF
Me, BS
Her, Forgiven
Married Dec 86
Multiple A's that ended '90
Rebuilding In Faith since then...
Currently deployed to Iraq, but TEXAS is Home!
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 665
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Nope. No sleep. Up and down all night. Ambien didn't help. Now I've got a stiff neck and puffy face.
I am going to one of the local AFB's today to seek legal counsel. I need to protect myself.
BS(me) 40
WH 40
D-day 10/03/2007
***Recovering and growing wiser and stronger.***
I was divorced 10/08/2008.
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LA, You might call the AFB first, before going. My experience has been the military legal dept, avoid personnel issues such as this.
Just don't want to see you make a trip, only to be disappointed.
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