How to link by keystroke

The post is in the middle of the page but I forgot to change the post number.....sorry. You can find it by scrolling down.

Hope that helps.

Ace

LH, Good morning Dear.

Go to your first post and edit from that one. It's should let you change it still.

Be careful he's not just keeping the door open for a cake eating extravaganza. The reason I say that is that it seems that every time he visits he has some sort of carrot that he dangles in front of you last week was this talk he couldn't tell you anything about (Did he ever man up to than one?) Now he visits and dangles this in front of you.

What is his angle? Here is a guess. He is still in full flight A, but is scared that you will L up and imposes a tight visitation schedule. So to keep the door open he has to carrot dangle.

This is a guy that a couple of weeks ago just about let the gas get cut off so in terms of trust he hasn't earned any. And maturity, well that's another story...

I'm sorry but IMHO he is just playing you so he can control when and where he sees his DD. If he was truly interested, he would cut off the A, agree to NC and get his sorry a$$ back home.

You worry about yourself and my little sweetie! You are more mature and stronger than he is anyway so guess who really looses in this deal. He just doesn't know it yet.

I am with TMTS on this one. He is playing you...even if his feelings are real, he is obviously cake-eating and doesn't want to commit to anything because he has everything right now! Only you can decide how long you will let him continue this behavior. I say Plan B has got be be around the corner, though, b4 you lose all your love for him.

Knock him off that fence b4 you start LBing each other...leave him in the dark now that he has started to have his so-called "change of heart."

Whachoo think?

i Know that and i guess i am kinda doing a little of tough love right now. I don't call him or text him..... if he does either to me sometimes i am available sometimes i am not. This week he had said he wants to do something together and i told him he will have to check with me that day cause i have plans a few nights this week.... which i do. He has called and talked to me each night now for at least half an hour and at the end he keeps saying thank you so much for talking to me ... yada yada. I know could all be malarky. He wants to try the AD to help him think clearer and he knows that this can't go on forever he has said he is tired of it and he is tired of living out of a suitcase.

I know actions speek louder than words so i am letting him do that i keep trying to plan A him when i have a chance but other than that i give him the distance i need to help myself heal as well. For the past week since i have been distancing myself we have not done a single LB either one of us. I don't know what changed in me to keep my mouth shut and not say another word about him coming home or him being with the OW. I know it's there and he is with her or talking to her or whatever but i just can't do it any more i am trying to wall myself off from that for now.

I know everyone thinks i should go to plan B. I just don't know how to do it yet. I have such a hard time with everything right now i just wish i knew where all of this is going. I keep composed most days but some days it just gets so hard to keep focused on me and not on what he is doing.

I hate the thought of knowing that he is probably spending so much time with her and he has left me and his daughter. I absolutely hate it right now. I don't know how to get past the anger at this POS that would do this to another woman and mother. I HATE it more than anything in the world right now.

I am sorry for sounding pathetic but i am just having a low dip in the roller coaster.

Well dear, this is the home of pathetic. I thought you said you read my thread. Geeze I've done well if I go for more that three days without sounding pathetic. But you see, what the good people made me understand early on is that the WS can not see this, so you come here to do it.

Here's the kicker in your thread. From what I can tell your the strong on in the M. You'll need this down the road, so don't give up. When you're down come see your friends here.

((((((LH and BLH)))))))

LH4E....

How long have you plan A'd your husband? If you've done a good plan A, you have to go into plan b before you lose your love for him. You know this right? If you grow to hate him, you may not be able to find your way back to him.

Please read about plan B. Here's a start....it's the Killer Bee's thread.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...part=1&vc=1

You don't sound pathetic, Loving. We are here to help you and support you. We want you to be able to get through this and be happy no matter what. I know that sounds hard to believe, but it is possible.

You will make it through this...just be patient with yourself, OK? You have a lot on your plate and the fact that you have maintained your sanity is enough for now! Better days are ahead and you will find your way back to happiness.

(((((Loving))))))

Thanks for the boost y'all have given me. I just keep trying to hold on to some shred of hope. I did not sign up for this when i got married and as my parents recall my WH driving an hour and half to meet with my parents and asking/begging for permission to marry me. I also did not sign up for this when we tried to have a baby and had two miscarriages and then i had to fight my body to even keep the precious mirical i do have. I feel so let down and it doesn't take much for him to give me some sort of hope. I just wish it was more than he is giving me. I just wish he would come home and say he will work things out. He keeps telling me that he has to decide if he wants to stay and work things out with me or move on to someone else.

From the sounds of things i am not to sure things are working out to well with the OW. I could only be hoping against all odds right now but who knows. It gets easier the less that i do see him then when i saw him frequently. I guess cause i am not constantly reminded about him and her and i guess cause i don't wonder as much.... who knows.

He says he wants to start doing things with me and he just has to find time from his "work schedual" you know me the brain thinks that he has to fit me in so the OW doesn't know he is going out with his wife. I could be over analyzing things and i know i have a tendancy to do that.

I just don't want to be sad about this any more. This was supposed to be a happy time in my life having my first child and now i have so much more on top of it all that it is almost taking away from her cause i have ten times more things to do besides taking care of her. I am in the process of trying to find a part time job so that i can take care of the bills cause they just seem to be piling up on top of everything i have here.