My Tanakh says it this way - For I am mindful of the plans I have made concerning you - declares the Lord - plans for your welfar, not for disaster, to give you a hopeful future.

Jer 29:12 When you call Me, and come and pray to Me, I will give heed to you.

Jer 29:13 You will search for Me and find Me, if only you seek Me wholeheartedly.

Jer 29:14 I will be at hand for you - declares the Lord - and I will restore your fortunes.

Yep, just posted something on your stitch.

OK...DH is making fun of me for being up at 3:30 a.m.

Check ya'll tomorrow...

TMTS,

Sorry to hear you have been having such a hard time lately. I know sleep sure is hard to come by when you can't turn your head off. I spent the better part of 12 months sleeping about 4 1/2 hours a day. Anyways, I did notice something that you posted earlier that I wanted to point out to you though.


This is the first time I've noticed you recognize the value that you bring to your M. You have learned so much since you began posting here. You are doing all you can to try to bring your WW from the fog. The rest will be up to her. Just try to meet her EN's as much as she will let you, but realize that in the end it is out of your control. You must do all you can to improve yourself in the meantime because if things don't work out your DD's will need their father to be there for them. Hang in there. Let me know if you need anything.

Want2Stay

W2S - You, your W, Skins, Mark, Mr. and Mrs. W amongst others have been the ones that have got me through this. Many of my friends and family are in the same confused boat I'm in, but you understand and guide to what is real and what is self-pity. Yet you all still let the self-pity come out, so long as I do it here. If my M does survive, I will have all of you to thank for it, and if it doesn't I still have all of you to thank because I would have followed the same self destroying script that may others have followed with disastrous results. (My two Cousins divorces come to mind).

What a goober-he yells at me and then keeps posting <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Just teasin...talk at ya in the mornin'!

See your hubby doesn't post oftwn but when he does it makes an impact. He's right... it is the first time that I look at my positive part of the relashionship. Not what I did wrong, but what I did right. Now it's for her to see it, and if she doesn't well I'm sure someone else will.

As hard as it is to believe, we will be better people because of this.

Have you ever read Psalm 23? I truly BELIEVE that G-d created this in our lives because our souls were dying in some way. And he wants to restore us. And here we are and so many others reaching for G-d, learning about our relationship with G-d and trusting in others who are helping us because of G-d.

I still am at that place where only my M being restored is a success. But that's today. Who knows what time will do for us. We surely don't. We are struggling just to make it through today. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

We will!!! Have any of you read Divorce busting and after the afair? Any comments if you have?

I know football's not your thing.

But, my skins won in case you hadn't heard. And guess what?
They gave up 1 rushing yard the whole entire game. That was just a miracle. What I witnessed on that field today is what I am experiencing in my life. Perserverance for a cause bigger than myself.

A cause that G-d has FAITH in ME and YOU, that we not only will survive but be the people he envisioned our whole life.

Just think of how cool that is.

Did you say 1? Now that's defence. Did you watch the Pariots game Saturday night? That was one good comback.

You'll be sorry to hear this but I am A steeler's fan. I used to watch religouly when I was a teenager but kind of lost interest in my later years.

Well I'm going to try to meditate and hopefully get myself into a state that I just oass out til morning.

Good night (Or morning)

My father was from Pittsburgh, so I am a fan of theirs too. Nothing like my Skins though.

Yes, 1 rushing yard the entire game. It was unbelievable.

I did watch the game on and off. WH was online and I was talking to him. Didn't do much good.

Good, sleep well and we can talk later on. It's morning, 1:12 and I have to head down to work before the rest of the crowd comes back on the 2nd.

Sweet dreams and may G-d spirit tonight restore your soul.

Yikes-4 hours of sleep! But I'm not doing too bad.

Hey TMTS, I sure hope w2s misses that Steelers post! He's a Browns fan and really miffed about the Colts less than stellar performance last night (which kept us out of the playoffs). He and his cousin have a long-time rivalry b/c he is a Steelers fan, too. They are hilarious about it! He might have to give you a 2x4 for that one!

I hope you got some sleep. Skinsgal, I'm gonna start reading some of your sitch...it's a lot of pages, though! Plus I'm half cross-eyed from no sleep! Although I'm sure you know how that feels, unfortunately!

Sorry guys-I didn't realize DH was still logged in on this computer...

Well I think this may be a good Plan A opportunity. WW just called asking if I wanted anything at the liquor store. She didn't sound right, so I asked her what was wrong. She said 'everything' and especially upset about the fight she had with ODD last night. I asked her if she had any plans for tonight (hopping she would bring up the party again), but she said, no she just needed some alcohol. So I told that I had an argument about clean up this morning so she was mad at me too. Then I finished up by telling her that we could chat about it if she wanted to.

LaLa, Mrs. W. Could this be a little crack in the armor?

She could be realizing the consequences to her children. She was convinced that they would adjust and everything would be OK. Her ODD doesn't even want to talk to her or see her right now. After I was done on the phone my ODD was upset and told me that I should ask my WW to move out ASAP.
I also understand that she was sad at not being with friends and family during the holidays.

I do not hold any expectations about the next couple of days, but will work the plan to its fullest and hopefully something will stay in her subconscious.

The only thing I am nervous about is crying babble. If it comes up I think I will just shut up and keep the reverse babble to a minimum. Somehow I think I should work in a "have no contact and see how you feel in 6 months".

Please keep me in your thoughts today; it's going to be a big one.

Good plan! I'm also thinking there may be more to her "mood" than she is saying (based on your earlier posts about how she acted when you tried to make plans with her for tonight), but I don't want to make assumptions. Either way, this would be a good opportunity to get close to her. As long as you do not give in to the R talk and crying babble, that is, otherwise it may turn sour. I am cheering for you, though!! We both are! Go TMTS!!!!!

W2S has to work until 1:00 a.m. tonight and I am pretty bummed. Don't like to be alone on a holiday, but whatcha gonna do! He was with me all through Christmas, plus we never do anything on NYE, so no big deal.

I'll let the vets chime in on whether the "wait 6 months" thing should be brought up, cuz I'm not sure. Somehow I think a quiet night together (talk to your ODD and make sure she also stays "quiet") without pressure may have a bigger impact than anything...?? I would be careful about bringing up her issues with ODD...she may try to blame you or twist your words around. If she makes you mad, you may slip out a "you brought this on yourself" and that (while true) would kinda defeat your purpose. But you are strong! Get dressed up and show off the "Mr. Dead Sexy" you say you are achieving...show her you are in control and waaayyy cool. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

PS-her screen name here was Itspouring, wasn't it? I need to check out her stuff. Why did she quit posting?

Hi Lala, The itspouring thing was a misunderstanding from my part. She dosn't even know about this site.

I went to get a roast for supper and when I was getting ready for the oven, my WW got home from work and got into it with ODD right away. I just shut up. She's locked up in our bedroom right now and sounds very upset. I knocked on the door to see if she was ok and aked her if I could get her anything, she said no and thanked me.

Yes, I'm well aware that she probably had plans tonight and my comming home changed things. I think the point the vets are trying to make here is that ever if she does leave there will always be situations where she will not be able to do as she pleases. I am sure that she a a picture painted that she would be a party girl once she left. Reality will not work that way.

I would be more than happy with just a quite night watching the ball come down at NYC....

I here tham going at it again. It doesn't sound pretty.

Hey TMTS,

I'm checking in on you. I am at work finishing up a project for when the teachers get back on Wednesday.

What are you doing for yourself today?

My ex's OW completely abandoned her 12 year old daughter and moved in with my ex. Her daughter asked her dad to throw her out when she used to come by for a weekend here and there. He was always patient and kind. He gave his daughter a good example of a loving husband and family man.

They are now back together after almost 5 years and seem to be very happy.

I cooked a nice pot roast dinner with mixed roasted vegies. I find that it's one activity do well that I can imerse myself completly.

Later I will hop on the treadmill and run 5K. (About 3 miles).

One day I'm going to be asked to prove this dead sexy thing so I best stay on track. LOL

She's still looked up in that room and has not come out. I can't imagine what is going through her head.