Wow, what an awesome day! Take everyone else's advice about not sharing this thread and keeping to Plan A, and no expectations, and her withdrawal. It is going to be a hard road and you will still need to come here and talk over events, so a new name might be a good idea for a while.

I can't wait to hear how OM gets his [censored] whipped. Poor gf. She is a victim too. It is likely she will call for more details when the smoke clears. Be rady for that.

All the very best congratulations TMTS. You worked so hard for this day.

Nina

Damn, and just before the 100 Page Plan A Award too!

Seriously, congrats. Take it nice and easy for a bit. Oh. . wait. . I forgot who I was talkin too. . nice and easy is your middle name!

Glad to hear it man! Hopefully you two will have a nice "honeymoon period". It doesn't really fix anything, but nothing wrong with a ton of sex, is there?

Ya we think he is pretty great!
I think you are a big help to him also!

Congrats TMTS. Don't forget though - you may have won a major battle, but the war's still ongoing. Don't let your guard down.

Um...I know you're probaby busy right now TMTS, there will be so much to do and talk about....but any chance of an update?

Here we sit like birds in the wilderness...

Hehehehe...I sang that song half the doggone day, Marky!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Where are ya TMTS!

Uhhhhmmmmm..I have a few guesses......is he in the bathroom?????

Hi All,

Well as you all pretty much guessed we've had one busy day. After calling everybody in the family, of course it's back to plan A, and made breakfast (I make incredible scrambled eggs, but they take 15 mins to cook) after that we needed to take care of everything associated with the apartment. Pick up girls bunk bed (Futon bottom style which we needed for the basement anyway), Mattress for the top of the bunk bed, go to phone store to get her cell phone number changed (Which they could not do there, which is good and you’ll see why in a minute), pick up a bottle of Baillie’s and case of beer for the neighbors.

We have more to do tomorrow regarding this. Call mediator to call off the LSA, Call super to let them know she wont be moving in (but until she rents it to someone else it will be known as the love shack) call cable and electric company to cancel hook ups.

So on our way to pick up the bunk beds I get a call from ODD, saying that somebody called for me but hung up when she asked who it was, at the same time DW (That is so nice to be able to type) gets a call from POSOM, he's loosing it! "Why is your H telling my GF she balling her eyes out because of this" I'm wanting her to give me the phone something bad. So he continues "F off and don't ever call me again." DW said "thank you don't". So now the NC letter is becoming a FU, NC you are a POS letter, if you ever come near or call any of us it will be an automatic restraining order (we should have it done tomorrow). But I don't think he will dare do anything. My Rev was right, these guys are big time cowards. He had my cell number but called her instead.

So we got home and had to get ready to go out. We had originally planned to go out for dinner with the IL's for my BILs B-Day, well instead we all went and invited my parents to join us as well. Well you could imagine the tear fest that as when we first got there. My M would not let her go and they stood there crying in each others arms for 5 mins. My D could not even look at her without having tears come up. It was a wonderful dinner and went a long way to start the healing process.

When we got back, we left the kiddies at home and went out for a few drinks at our favorite local pub. Had a very nice discussion about some of the things we wanted to take care of ASAP. Figuring out where our finances are setting up a "Get away fund" She is talking Caribbean, but I'd like to surprise her with Hawaii. We are going to do it as a second honeymoon and set up to renew our vows (This was her idea).
We talked a little on what started the change in her mind, and everything that she came up with was directly related to plan A. Being civil, no LBs, getting her surprise little gifts, the obvious gathering of emotional strength, the tough love that really made her think that she could loss me as well (She had already figured out that OM was a POS but kept her poker face on, which I complimented her on).
Then last night when she saw I was upset but not in a weak way, then hung out with the neighbors all night and didn't say a word to her, that was the final straw where she decided to talk to me in the morning to see if we could work this out

Then we came home, she went straight to bed and I’m here.

As far as the comments today, thank you to all, this would not have been possible without your help.

I fully understand that all the work so far was just to get us to the starting point, and the difficult part is ahead.

As far as showing her MB, we talked about it tonight and we will first read SAA together followed by after the affair, and then will come to the board. She is very nervous about that right now not because of what she would read in my posts, but worried about being 2X4d senseless. I told her that this only happens to WSs that are just trying to cause trouble, FWS are some of the most respected and appreciated folks on the board, and so long as you are honest about things you will be just fine. So I figure that it will be at least a few weeks before getting her here.

I like the idea of changing the name and starting a thread in the recovery section.
So I got a couple of name ideas.
The obvious one – TMTS
Or the one my cheerleaders seem to like laundry boy.

If there are other suggestions out there, let’s hear them.

Oh BTW, did any of you actually buy that we came home and she went straight to bed? She did but not to sleep. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Well, DH is typing like mad, so I'll keep this short! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Congrats, once again, and I am so very happy for you. You deserve all the happiness in the world!! You have been a shining star here and a perfect example of what can happen when the MB principles are followed to a T!! I'm sooooo glad you did not have to go Plan B, though.

Enjoy your time together now, there will be plenty of time down the road to work through all of your issues together.

Oh and BTW...thank for keeping us up till 3:00 a.m. for the update, ya chithead!! Just kidding-we were up anyways. Night owls, we are!!

TMTS,

I'm suprised you had the strength left to type all that! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Seriously, TMTS, I am so happy for your family right now. You have a very good plan lined up. After all the work you have done here I'm sure the two of you will do just fine. Besides, if you get out of line, I'm sure everyone here wont't hesitate to give you the 2x4's to whip you back into shape! Congratulations!

Want2Stay

Is that another name idea? LOL

DW is not much of a reader but will sit and let me read to her. So this will be good as we work through these chapter by chapter.

She kept on thanking me today for not giving up on her. I did explain that some of the things that she saw a difference in was a direct result of what I learned here. So that kind of sparked her interest. I also told her about the DVD workshops and she is interested in that as well.
I think the best thing that happened today was the call from the GF and then the call from OM. GF confirmed that his is a POS and he proved it when he called later. I hope this poor girl doesn't fall for his bull.

Lots to do tomorrow, On top of the stuff I mentioned earlier, we got curling with YDD, got to set up wireless network (She bought a laptop for when she moved), finish putting together bunk bed.

Oh ya we got to go set up the Love shack... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Hey TMTS!

Man, you don't know how good it makes me feel to read your most recent posts!

This is why I'm still around here on MB. Yes, you guys still have a lot of work to do, but you now have a plan and a direction.

Rebuilding will be painful and it will take a long time, but as you can see from the past couple hours... it IS worth the efforts.

I salute you and your willingness to fight for your family! Please give my regards to your DW and let her know that we will welcome her when she feels comfortable in joining us here.

Semper Fi,

RIF

I'm glad things are going so well TMTS. I hope it continues, but try to remember not to rush things or have great expectations right now. Take baby steps. From what I hear recovery can be a difficult road too. See, you KNOW all the MB stuff, and so you are in danger of trying to share it with her because you think it is the best thing since sliced bread. But as others have said before me, best not to try to educate your wife when she is not yet ready to hear. It may well be all to much for her. She has been through a tough time too, and is probably still in the fog a little bit(and withdrawal).

Your Plan A magnificence is what she needs right now, and lots of it. Take it slow.

But boy I am so pleased for you! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Great job - right down to the wire and before liquidating the family net worth for the LSA. The getaway will be a great move.

definatly laundryboy! that's too funny!!

what a great family get together that must have been, yeah for the whole family!!

Aww TMTS,

Your going to make us cry.....I am happy for you though, but then again we never doubted you could do this.

As far as Laundry Boy goes, does this mean I lose out on your services????

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Not to totally douse you in reality or anything...

BUT.....

There will be ups and downs and probably more downs for a few months.

They may in fact see each other again or want to see each other again for "closure"

A very wise poster, Snowbelle said this about withdrawal....


It will get rocky and bumpy TMTS and your wife will start spewing fog and will probably break NC a few times.

The affair may also continue further underground.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad tidings.

Congtarulations on this important breakthrough - you won one battle but will have to be vigilant to win the war!

AHHH!!! TMTS!!! I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! I haven't read the thread to see how this came about... I am going to read now, I was just SO THRILLED to read this!!!

I am sooooo happy for you!!! This just MADE MY MONDAY MORNING!

RIM <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

TMTS,

You know you could come by to let us know what's going on occasionally. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Mark