Haven't been on tbis forum for months. Need advice again please...soon..

My H somewhat "badmouths" me to others...actually, he plays the martyr, and complains about me to others.

I am married to man who has this need to be the center of attention. He crys on other peoples shoulders, and has been somewhat successful at alienating some of our friends from me.

He is passive aggressive, and he will do anything for pretty much anybody...but me.

You know the type: the neighbor who always seems to be ready willing and able to fix your mower, plumbing, carpentry...and I can't get him to wipe his feet before he comes in the door.

I have been in and out of counseling, I am working to not be a doormat, no wonder he walks on me...I let him.

We have had a few good months, and we spent 6 days together on vacation..and this behavior of his started again.

The folks we rent a weekend place from (the wife, anyway) let me know he is doing this. She is also a long-married middleaged gal like myself, and I was glad she told me.

I confronted him...as USUAL he blew up at me..went into a rage, denied he ever does anything wrong...Yes, I make an effort to use the "this hurts me" or do my best to be non-accusatory, now some of our "friends" treat me like I am poison

O.K...I would like some suggestions on how to get my husband to keep our problems OUR PROBLEMS. we have close friends...I know he confides in, but why does he try to turn aquaintenances against me? Of sourse everyone LOVES him, and I am an evil you know what.
Help, please.