My wife and me got married Sept 8th but we have been together for 2 years. Everything was great until about a month after we got married. I'm in the military living in Washington and she lives in California. She was suppose to move up here in November job or no job but she didn't want to when november came. I went there on leave in November and found out she was talking to someone else that doesnt even live in californina. She says they are just friends but I was able to intercept some emails and found out that they were more than just friends. I also found out that he visited her while i was gone for a week and slept in her bed. She said nothing happened and he was a complete gentlemen. I was infuriated with this because nothing like this ever happened before. I told her i forgave her and told her to cut contact with him and we can move on, she agreed. Things did not get better, a week later she wanted a divorce. We talked things out and agreed to try to work things out.

She came up here fo xmas and new years, she was very secretive with her phone the whole time. The time we were apart she neve showed any affection or even act like she cares about me. When she came she was still the same way and says she just needs time to get the feelings back but she doesn't know if she can. Again she told me she wanted a divorce. When i took her to the airport the day she was going to leave she got a phone call about a job she applied for and she took the job to move up to washington with me.

She goes back home and puts in her 2 weeks notice all the long she says she really doesnt want to move, but i try to convice her its the best for us. She told me last weekend that she wanted to go to San Diego for the weekend with her friends because it would be there last time together and i agreed. Come to find out she went there to meet the guy she has been messing around with me with. i confronted her and she again said she wanted a divorce and out of the marriage. the next day she said dhe still wanted to come up here but she doesnt know if we are going to work out. Sshe is suppose to move here this weekend. can anyone tell me what is going on with her and what i should do. By the way she said nothing has ever happened between them, they never kissed or had sex, should i believe that?

Hello,

If you believed that nothing happened then you are delusional. He slept in her bed for a week. She is seeing him behind your back. I feel for you but you need a reality check. She is acting like a single woman and has totally humiliated and disrespected you. If you have been intimate with her then you need to be checked for STD's. I do not know how she can say she has not been physical with him without laughing. I hate to be harsh but she is playing you so badly. I would contact a lawyer as soon as possible. She is married and lets a man visit her at her place and slept in her bed for a week....Oh please. Surely you can do better than this and not settle for a wife who is so blantant about betraying your marriage like this. I wish you luck.

Welcome. You might want to copy and paste this in General Questions. Your wife is having an affair. You will get better help there.