I was divorced about a year and a half ago. I have to children ages 5 and 10. In the divorce decree I demanded for and am the residitial parent and custodial parent. We have 50/50 custody and I get my boys every other week for a week.
My children have attended school and daycare where we have lived for 4 years now. I chose to stay were we lived to provide stability for my kids.
Upon leaving me my ex immediatly moved out of the area and school district my kids are in to be with her lover. She recently married (after she got pregnant) the man she left me for and just had a child a few weeks ago. When we exchanged the boys this week she told me that she would be getting a lawyer if I didn't allow my kids to switch to the school district she lives in. I had already talked to my lawyer about this because I knew that this would happen eventually.
I told her that she can do whatever she wants that I would not move my children out of the stability they have had. She only wants what is conveinient for her again at the expense of her children.
Does she have a leg to stand on? Would the court reopen a custody case just because she wants conveinience?????

Courts tend to try to keep things "status quo" as much as possible. It will be up to her to justify why now, after four years, it is important to move the children away from the district they have been in this whole time. And "just because" isn't a valid reason either...and I'm sure the judge will agree.

I'm sure the court would probably re-open the case, but that certainly doesn't mean that she will win. In fact, perhaps you could use that opportunity to argue for more than 50% custody. Is she reliable in her time with the boys? Does she ever try to get you to take them during her time? What kind of mother is she to the boys (besides the fact that she just married the OM and had another baby, how is she with the two boys)?

If the courts need more than a just because why and how quick would the case even be heard?
She is good about her time with the boys. She tries to take them from me more, for example she planned her wedding on my week with the kids...so I had to give them up 2 days early so they could attend...pretty immature on her part IMO.
She continues to put the boys in the middle of her wants. For example, she is now trying to get them signed up to attend soccer in the city she lives in because she knows its difficult for me to attend or get them to practices because I work and she doesn't.
I have waved child support...but now that she is married isn't it based on household income??

Your situation is very different than many in that you have 50/50 and you are PPR (parent of primary residence).
I have a friend who is pursuing moving her children (and a father who will object).
She has found a wealth of information on various state websites which actually define what is in the best interest of the children.
She met with a lawyer who says she has a good chance of moving the kids to a new school (about 20 minutes away). She'd considered moving farther, but thought more about it.

How far is she planning on moving? If it's not far, the courts might tell her to just drive the kids. They really try to favor the children in these cases. Trust in the courts, they've seen it all.

So, rather than worry, do your own research now to find out all you can. To use up your worry energy, take what you've learned and begin drafting a "court" document addressing all the key points. That way, if you do need to get an attorney, you'll have it all in writing to hand off to a lawyer, with your own documentation and view of the situation, which will save you time and money later.

"Trust in the courts." Oh boy.

Stay on top of things, and don't let her get you on a technicality. Since you have primary custody, things should go in your favor, but that doesn't mean they will. I would push the stability issue, and the fact that she chose to move away.

As I understand it, child support is only based on the parent's income, not household.

You could tell the ex that if she chooses to play this game, you will go after child support from her. Might scare her off.

My lawyer told me to tell her that I will go after child support and that since I have worked for the best school district in the area for 4 years that if things get reopened I will request to move to that school district not the district she moved to...which she moved to before the divorce was final. I took my lawyers advice and she laughed at me and acted really cocky and immature about...not to mention she alwasy brings these things up during the exchange of the children rather than contact me alone.

I have kept a log/journal of all the events since day one so I have that and my lawyer is well aware of the situation. I am just curious how long you think it would take to reopen a custody case that was just finalize a year ago and she really has no change in circumstance other than the fact that she had a baby and is tired of driving the other 2 kids back and forth on the weeks she has them.

She can file to open the case whenever she wants, but your attorney can tell you that. I would make sure and NEVER discuss the issues during and exchange. Let her ramble on, just ignore her. I would also just do things over e-mail so you have a record. If need be, video tape the exchanges to "keep her honest." Then it won't just be your word against hers.

I thought I read earlier that you felt you had a better stance by asking to keep the current stability. I read that your attorney suggested a move to your school district, but if you take that angle, why would your suggested move be better than hers? I'd stay away from that one.

I think he wanted me to do that to put a scare in her. I have no plans to move.

Interesting the contrast between your actions and those of most women on this site who have been cheated on. I don't hear you demanding her out of the kid's lives, or ripping her off for money. Quite the opposite of the "weaker" sex.

I am proud of you, and would act the same if I were granted custody. Sad that most of the bitter women here act like they are God and dad has no rights except what they confer upon him.

Keep up the good work, you are the stability in your boy's lives.

thank you

I have leaned on God and continue to be the rock that my children deserve.

You have it right. Do the right thing and it will work out.
Trust in the Lord.

How far is she talking? Out of state, 10 minutes drive, this really does make a difference.

I do believe in doing the right thing, but remember it is in God's time, not ours. I have trouble with that currently, since I continue to do the right thing and continue to get my rear handed to me by the courts.

But I will not be dissuaded, I still believe God is in control.

Good luck with your battle. Hopefully she is just spouting off.

I'm really struggling today with these recent events...I could really use some words of encouragement

Different events? Please expand.

Just about my ex wanted to file for residential rights when just a year ago she did not dispute that right being given to me. She recently had a child with OM and lives 40 miles from where I live and our children attend school and have for 4 years.

Do you have a support system? Family, friends, clergy, with whom you can talk about this, get advice, ask for help? Anyone who is also connected to exW who can help you mediate a solution? If nothing else, arrange a lunch where you two can talk about the issues in a neutral setting? Without judgmment or disrespect, just to solve it? Sometimes you just need to ask for help. It makes people feel good to help others, lol. Can you find someone?

I have attempted to resolve this with the ex but its her way or the highway. I just don't feel that because she left and moved away that I have to reorganize my life AGAIN because she lives somewhere else with her new hubby and its just to inconveniant to take our children back and forth now. I fought for nothing in the divorce except for 50/50 custody and residential rights. I just feel that she wants her cake and eat it to as was the case throughout the divorce...when there is something she wants its her way or the highway...she never wants to compromise.
I just feel as though my kids have been through enough and switch there school after 4 years and only a year and a half after the divorce is not in their best interest.