he feels my friends and I railroaded him into getting married, even though he asked me, called the preacher and set the date. We;ve been married 4 years tomorrow.

Friday before Christmas I discovered he'd had a cell phone texting affair with his boss. this is a small small town, and there are no other opportunities. he says we can't leave b/c we just relocated our elderly parent here.

At first I thought we would be ok, we talked a lot. Then, he just sort of withdrew - literally and in so many ways. I thought he was grieving the loss of this "intense friendship" yet is still seeing her everyday at work.

Now, yesterday, he says he never wanted to marry me, he's sorry he didn't stand up for himself then, and he's not sure he wants to be married now. One moment he is happy and affectionate and the next mean and grumpy and unclear on what to do. He wont go to couseling, or read much. He says he is numb, he can't feel anything, can't think, doesn't know what he wants...and where does this leave me? We hav a ten year history of being really tight friends, then married - what happened?

The last few years have been stressful for me, my mom died on the other side of the country, then dad got sick and I stayed with him two months. Then I came home and was sick, turns out it was my gallbladder, but I was still sick after. Later diagnosed with fibromyalgia, then right before christmas (and DD) that I have rheumatoid arthris. I am applying for disability because I am literrally unable to work, and that is when he really started getting wierd on me.

My 16 year old is refusing to go to school, hasn't been for three weeks. My job is stressfull and bad, I hate that my job is high profile, when I am out, which is more and more frequesntly as the stress piles up, I get into more and more grief from my boss who denies that we are overstaffed or that I am sick.

Now my dad, 91, is in a nursing home having cardiac problems.

WHat do I do first? I've been on my knees, please help pray with me!

I know ultimately in the end, I will be ok, its just this LIMBO that I cannot abide.

Thank you in advance, I have more to write but its cold here and my fingers are getting stuck. need to warm up.