Any ideas on how to find out where OP works? I'm having trouble locating this info. She has left her previous employer - I called for her there to see if they would tell me where she works now, but they said they don't know.

I need that info to find out if she's occupied during the day or not and if her employer is a possible point for exposure.

I have a feeling that she isn't working, but I'd like to know how she's maintaining her household as a single mom if she doesn't have a job.

Also, I know she was never married to the kids father, but I do know his name. I haven't been able to find any info on him for exposure to see if he may have some leverage there.

I want to find out how to get in touch with her mother in case that is an option for help. Her dad is deceased, so he will be no help.

I know she has a car, but couldn't find out about the registration and there was no listing for a current driver's license. Is there a way I can get this info? I have a terrible fear that the car is somehow tied to my H.

Any ideas would be really helpful.

I would suggest hiring a P.I. One that some have used here is Frank Music, whose info is listed on the Spying 101 thread. He does a good job and charges reasonable prices.

Have you googled her name?
Have you checked www.intelius.com?
Does she own her home?
Google your county property appraiser then go on their website and search under her name. Also google your county court. Then go on their website and search records with her name.

KLD, on second thought, don't you already have a PI working for you? He can get all that information for you.

I do have a PI, but she was unable to find out where she is working. I got the name of her children's father from the PI, but they've been unable to find any more info on him.

I went to intellius and couldn't get much complete data on her. She owns a trailer on an acre of land - PI found out that she inherited the land when her father died, but couldn't find any more out about the trailer and if it has a mortgage or if it's paid for.

What info do you have ie. name, addresses, previous employers, vehicle make & model, phone #, etc? You know, sometimes just tailing her, and paying a bribe at a business she just came out of can provide lots of info? People are greedy, take advantage if you can.

Can you not tail her or the PI tail her to work one day?

Do you have access to the WS's cellphone? It may provide a ph#.

Hi KLD
I'm pretty good at getting information as I am a computer geek but haven't really followed your story.

Can you tell us what you do have on OW now?

For instance, do you know how they met, where she lives, her phone number, name, address etc. Often a little lateral thinking will get you there.

Oh and do you have access to any electronic records from WH such as backups of his computer or phone records? Backups often contain data deleted from current records :-))))

This is a long shot, but a lot of mom's sell on eBay. You know where she lives. Do a search on her city. Use the closest mileage you can find to her. Check the profiles of both active and non-active sellers. Many have personal info on their "Me" pages.

Like I said, this is a long shot, but there you go.

My PI tailed her for 2 days and she never went to a job - but my WH was there those 2 days so she could have taken off work. She lives 4 hours away from me, so just tailing her isn't as easy as it sounds. I've already spent a fortune just proving he spent the night at her place for 2 nights this week.

I know her name, address, cell phone #, home phone #, father of her kids name, what kind of car she drives. The report my PI pulled up had no vehicle registered in her name and no driver's license in her name, but she drove around for the 2.5 days my PI was there.

I did search the property ownership records in her county and got the same info I already had.

Maybe I don't need more info than I've got, but I sure do want to know who may have influence over her so I can expose to people who know her.

I will try the eBay route and see what turns up.

Hum so possible she is using two different last names as the car registration and licence have to match. Unless she moved from another state fairly recently?

Do you know what work she has done in the past? This might give you some clues on where to start looking.

Call the house during the day (withhold the number of course) and see if she answers. If she does, she may not work or may do something from home.

KLD, usually the only reason one would expose at work is if it is a workplace affair or they hold a position of public trust, ie: minister, mayor, etc. I don't think in this case that either would apply.

I would be interested in finding out her source of support, though. I wonder if there is any way to get her tax return or credit report. Is employment listed on credit reports?

I would not be surprised to find out they are also 'married' in some fashion ... "OUCH!"

This situation has some whiff <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> of bigamy to it.

Agree with Pep. At the very least, he has a very elaborate secret second life going on here.

KLD, you don't know me from Adam...

However, this is what I would do if I found myself in your position.

I'd 'expose' this week. But not the usual way. You already have more than enough 'evidence' to expose.

I would leave a copy of OW's driver's license in your WH's briefcase.

I would take her actual license with me during exposure. AND, I'd take some other things too. I'd take our marriage license. My wedding photo album, and a camera of some sort.

I would drive the 4 hours to OW's home. I would wait to be certain WH was not there.
I would knock on the door and say:

"Do you know who I am?"

I bet you OW has been told (and is convinced) that YOU (if she even knows you exist) are terminally ill, in a mental institution (or need to be), or are in some other way not his actual wife he lives with.

My money is betting on ~~~> she does not even know you exist!

I would introduce myself:

"I am Mrs John Smith. Please call me Jane."

and then I would say:

"I found this (her driver's license) in my husband's briefcase. Would you like it back?"

The wedding album & marriage license is to prove you are who you say you are.

and you are not dying
and you are not crazy

I would also take the opportunity to ask OW (who may think YOU are the OW by-the-way) this question:

"Is my husband paying you proper child support?"

Do not ask if he is the Father, word the Q to her carefully .... as if it is a known fact.

Be prepared - she may be more shocked than you!

By NO means give WH any clue/hint/indication that you have any of this planned.

best of luck.

PS .... your WH may have an alias ... hence the PI could find no info on the bio dad of OW's child ! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

PSS .... the OW is also a victim if she does not know of your existence ... tread carefully.

I think, if I remember correctly, KLD has talked to this OW on the phone. OW spoke in a rude or hostile tone. I think it is a woman that KLD had some concern about a few years ago. I recall that KLD's WH assured her OW meant nothing to him and that he would sever contact with her. Now maybe that was another OW, but that is what I recall.

More than likely, WH has spun an amazing yarn about KLD--something along the lines of a marriage of convenience (only stated in far more basic words of course) But I do think this OW knows of the marriage/relationship and knows of KLD. She is probably someone with poor boundaries who would love drama as long as it only involved good potential gossip to talk about at the local diner and did not involve her in the courts in any way, shape or form. I doubt she views lawyers, judges, police as potential friends.

If what you say is true, then I am 100% wrong ! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
and can be ignored 100% <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I wouldn't be a bit surprised if my WH as a second life with OW. However, what Lake says about my history is absolutely true. I have spoken to OW and she she definitely knows of my existence. WH has promised more than once to sever ties and has vehemently denied any contact with her.

If she was truly a victim, I'd let her know what she was dealing with and help her howevber I could. That is not the case here, though.

I'm pretty sure she doesn't work. I'm going to try to find out if she's on government assistance. Anyone know if there's a way to find that out? I guess I can ask my PI, but didn't know if anyone here has had experience there.